


My Love (Loki x Reader)

by redlacegirl



Category: Loki - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: 18+, BDSM, Bloodplay, Bottom Loki (Marvel), Chains, Choking, Dirty Talk, Dom Loki (Marvel), Dom/sub, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Good Loki (Marvel), Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Knifeplay, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Magic, Marvel Universe, NSFW, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, POV Loki (Marvel), Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Protective Loki (Marvel), Spanking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:35:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 27
Words: 71,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29354304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redlacegirl/pseuds/redlacegirl
Summary: "Having affection and respect does not make one weak nor naive"Although you had lived for 1.067 years, no time went by longer than that you were forced to take, without a choice, you are stranded on the unsuspecting planet Earth, waiting for him, waiting under his promise.Many would say you were a fool, but not you, you knew his promises were worth, as long as they were for you. And you were never wrong.You're Sygin, goddess of fidelity, you are soul bonded to Loki, the love and respect you have for each other is strong, you chose to stay separated under the threat that is Thanos to you and him, until one day he comes back, and with Loki always comes trouble, good thing you love trouble****A FEW NOTES:If you are under 18 please DO NOT read this fic, idk how inappropriate it'll get. However i will be putting warnings on the chapters that have mature content and any other necessary warnings along the way.Now the reader technically isn't y/n, i wanted to make her Sygin because i always liked the idea of her as a character, but it'll still be a y/n pov, kinda 😂
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

The deep green scenery was gorgeously intimidating, miles and miles of tall pines and soft grass extended ornamented with the morning mist, thick gloomy fog glazed over the height of the mountain, hiding whatever trace of nature was on it in an almost embracing, gentle manner; it's smell, light, mixed and danced with the smell of pine and eucalyptus. And to top it off, absolute silence, so much silence, it was almost loud, it was all almost overwhelming.

Waking up, even still inside the cottage, you could feel it, the heftiness of the mountain, claiming, reminding you of it's size and disposition. But you loved it, you had always been one to adore nature, the forest, the clouds, the grass in between your toes, the humming silence in the morning.

Your feet dragged out of bed, the always shocking contact with the cold wooden floor making you groan, eyes still closed, hair long and messy, you dragged your hands through it and stopped behind your neck, sighing at the start of yet another day...alone. You rubbed your arm stepping to the kitchen, looking forward to the nice touch of a hot cup of tea.

As the kettle warmed up you went back to the bedroom, glancing at the 'too big' bed as you pulled a different more cozy sweater into your arms over the long dress you had put on. Too big? Or too empty? You questioned to yourself as you turned to glance at it once more before leaving the room. You estimated the kettle would be ready in about 20 minutes, maybe more, you hated doing things too fast, it always left you with too much time in your hands, time you couldn't make use of, and had to spend lonely, in the stillness of a lonely house.

You opened the back door besides the end of the kitchen counter, your eyes squinted and your breath hitched slightly at the sudden steel cold in the air, you sled in your boots and made your way down the few steps, already feeling more energized at the mixture of cold morning weather and the landscape in front of you.

A bucket in hand, you came to a stop a few feet away from the cottage, looking around briefly before licking your lips and bringing your hands to cup around them, you breathed slowly. A high melody escaped your mouth, coming slowly to a low stop and picking up at the end, the mountain mimicked you in the form of echoes and you continued singing the ancient melody. 

At first sight, or hearing, it sounded like a beautiful smooth chorus, but it's notes were enchanting to a herd, you had found it worked greatly on animals from Midgard, some Asgardian species would be inmune but the more simple creatures on your now planet of residence were hypnotized by it, it didn't even need to be perfect, yet, you sung it high and straight, like you were taught to. At the fourth wave of your song, you saw the cows approaching you in a trot, you smiled to yourself.

-Hello everyone- you said as they met you to a stop.  
\- Crispy morning isn't it?-

Your fingers scratched down the chin and neck of one of the creatures, she looked up at you and you mimicked her face, kneeling down with the bucket under her you rolled your sleeves up and started pumping with your fists.

-Almost done...- you spoke to your side to find a hungry calf waiting for it's turn.  
-Thank you gorgeous- you patted her side from your crouching position when you were done.

As you rolled your sleeve back down you sensed movement nearby, when you looked forward into the forest you caught the fiery eyes and fur of a red fox, your lip curled up in a grin as you locked eyes with the gorgeous predator, standing up slowly, you both held the gaze, enchanted by the sight of each other, it took a few steps forward, your fingers lightly stretched towards it sending a comforting wave of magic it's way, she, it was a she, you figured through the magical touch. She came forward in security and you sat down again, feeling the wet grass under your thighs; when she was close enough she gave your fingers a sniff or two before rubbing his face against it, you chuckled as you gained her trust.

-You hold your own magic too don't you?- you looked into her eyes again  
\- In those eyes...-

Even though her eyes didn't resemble them at all you still drifted back to the memory of the last set of eyes you had seen that held such magic in them, they were out there, somewhere, and you'd wait for them, longing to lose yourself in their iceberg blue once again. Zoning out, your free hand fidgeted with the small pendant that hung from your neck, the small distant tingle of energy holding your body weight in hopes, in patience. 

You stood up as the fox trotted away from you slowly, the sunset orange of her fur disappearing into the deep green of the forest. 

-Lovely to meet you friend- you sighed to yourself.  
Midgardians are surrounded by such beauty, what a shame they lay waste to it. 

The weather grew nicer throughout the day, with the sun out and not many clouds it gave way to a warm coat over the mountain, though the breeze remained cold, balancing it perfectly.  
It was a beautiful day, it almost felt Asgardian in a way, you frowned to yourself at the thought, you weren't fond of it's constant sunny weather, but home is home, and you hadn't been home in a long time.

Speaking of home, you reached the pull of your magic to a high shelf in the tall library standing in your living room, there was only so much one could do when hiding in a foreign planet away from it's population with your magic as your only companion, therefore the books only multiplied in number, so many brought from your personal collection back in Asgard, you wouldn't usually read them, they reminded you of him, everything reminded you of him; your soul a pathetic mere piece of something scattered somewhere in the vast universe you couldn't possibly look for, an empty heart forced to wait a return that tugged at the back of your head with anticipation that never ceased. And a danger that plagued your worries, no matter how strong it's opponent was. 

You weren't exactly cheerful at the idea of not doing nothing, you were a warrior after all, what worse than forcing an Asgardian warrior to stay out of battle? You used to know a few names that would go insane at the thought of it; but you were a sorceress as well, and spells required patience, and you had quite the load for that. The options for you at the time were taking a step (a galaxy length step) back and go into hide out until the time was right, or risking your life in a battle you couldn't win...again.

There was always reasoning behind your actions, and it remained strong even after 5 years, even if your spirit longed for his connection.  
You weren't reading the book anymore at this point, sitting on the front porch feeling the breeze in your hair, skirt and arms, now bare without the sweater; so deep in thought you didn't notice the distant rumble in the sky.

In the midst of your third dissociation of the day, you were brought back in a second, an alarm sounding in your mind, that strong tug pulling at the back of your head, catching your attention, your eyes twitching, moving as though you were searching for something in your own mind, they slowly rose up and to your side, your breath hitched at the familiar presence growing closer, what is it? 

Closer, and closer, and clearer.

Your eyes shot up in a frown, your mouth agape with anticipation, your legs buzzing nervously as you stood looking forward to the field leading to your house.

But your home wasn't behind you, it was in front of you.

Four figures were advancing, two you didn't recognize, three you didn't even care for, and one...one was all you had promised your heart for 5 years.

He was back.


	2. New Danger

He was here, he was really here.

You didn't have much time to feel happy about it though, because he was barely walking on his own, being held by his adoptive brother, the God of Thunder in the flesh. You ran the steps down from the front porch and forward to meet the group of men, and a creature Midgardians knew as a raccoon, glancing up at you with confused eyes. 

Loki had his head hanging low and he held his left arm to his chest, his expression of exhaustion and effort, soft groans escaping through his teeth; sweat, rubble and blood stained his sharp features all the way down to his boots as you approached them.

-He needs a caretaker- You heard Thor speak with a red mouth and a rather desperate tone. 

-Yes i can tell- you replied looking into Loki's barely open eyes.  
-Bring him inside, now.- you turned on your heel and trotted up to the house once again.

-Take him to the bedroom and lay him down quickly- you spoke in a rush pointing to the bedroom.

While putting your hair up in a ponytail you ran to the bathroom and opened the cabinet under the sink to reach for the medical supplies you had acquired, it wasn't something you always used but in your cunning it felt right to have them around, and thank heavens you had.

You entered the bedroom again to a groaning Loki on your bed and a few very confused men, Thor was kneeling besides his brother and shot his concerned eyes up at you again when you came in, he moves aside to let you examine Loki.  
His ribs were broken, his right shoulder dislocated, he had a cut on his lip and eyebrow, along with some more on his arms and chest, and the epicenter of the situation, a stabbing wound on his side. It ached, seeing him like this, but now wasn't the time, you took a deep breath and got to work.

You undid the upper layer of leather he was wearing, tossing it behind you without looking and working to take off the vest under it, you had unclipped his cape and left it sprawled under him. Once the vest was off you took a quick scan of his chest and torso, filtering the new bruises and scars from the old ones, then his face, he carried more of an annoyed expression than hurt, you let out a sad smirk at the reason why, and stretched your body across his to his shoulder, having to take care of it first before his healing factor ruined it. 

1...2...3 

Your breath hitched and you pushed down and out until you heard a loud pop, like you were trained. He let out a small choked huff and his expression angered, you patted his cheek quickly.

-Now now darling, we've been through worse haven't we?- another sad smile was sent his way and his breathing evened out.

Now onto the stabbing wound, it was big, not terrible, but big. You needed to turn him around.

-Thor!- you turned to face him, he seemed momentarily shocked at you knowing his name.  
\- I need your help turning him around okay? And when we do it press this gauzes against the front of the wound, understood?- 

He positioned himself and you slowly lifted Loki's frame, leaving his back facing upwards, pink deep scars traced his back, the thick jagged stains of a torture long ago, now outshined by the purplish green bruises and the fresh wound on his side; there was an exit wound, and you got to work, you could hear the muffled groans he let out as you cleaned it up.

Thor's gaze shifted through mild shock and confusion as he stared at his brother's back, you wouldn't expect anything more, considering how little Loki let him know of the suffering you two had endured, but mostly his little brother. You felt sympathy for him, he never gave up on Loki and he didn't even know the half of it.

There wasn't much else you were inclined to do, Loki's stamina and healing factor could take care of this, but you did have to clean him up at least, help the process a bit by avoiding infections. And you looked around at the other two people in the room standing and waiting awkwardly and also slightly confused.

-Gentleman if you'd be so kind to step out and I'll be right with you- they nodded and walked out -Thor, it's okay...- 

You called at him and he looked up, still a bit dazed, but tired, you could tell in his eyes.

-I got it from here, thank you- you said softly at him, and shot him a closed, comforting smile, you spread bandages across his waist and Thor lowered him down again on his back, and slowly left.  
Now the room was only filled with your rustling and his deep breathing, which slowed and calmed down after you re positioned his shoulder, he was exhausted, you felt it, and soon he seemed to fall asleep.

Wiping his face from dried blood and dirt, you paused to look at him, his high cheekbones sharp yet soft, the bridge of his nose strong as always, his mouth in a thin line and his brows in a frown.   
Same old Loki.  
You smiled at the thought, and leaned in to place a kiss on his warm temple, he was back.

You stepped into the dining room to find, once again, these three individuals, looking at you, were they worried about Loki? No, that's not what their shifting positions said, yet none of them would speak. You raised your brows.

-Right, would anyone like a cup of tea?- 

Thor's mouth fell agape for a second.  
-Ah, yes...thank you-

You nodded and turned to the more confused, shorter and older looking man, and the raccoon...  
They both shook their heads and you headed for the kitchen, soon after you heard Thor's heavy steps besides you.

-You have questions...- you started.

-I do, -he paused- how do you know Loki?-

You knew he'd ask that. You snapped your fingers over the stove and a flame sparked up, you placed the kettle on top of it.

-That's quite a long story- you smiled, it really was.

You walked back to the dining room where the other man and the creature had sat down, you gestured offering Thor to do the same, and he did.

-Didn't know your brother had friends- the raccoon looked at you.

-Then who are you?- you joked, signaling at other man and him.

-I'm asking the same thing- he continued.

You shifted your weight and smiled.  
-I'm Sygin- 

The shorter man spoke.  
-Are you Asgardian?-

-Yes, although not always proudly- you cocked a brow and smiled bigger.

-You're from Asgard, then how are you here?- Thor spoke.

-I've been here for a while, it's safer...- you started- And i'm sorry, I didn't catch your names- 

-Rocket...- the raccoon said.

-Sorry, Bruce- the man extended his hand and you shook it.

You heard the growing whistle of the kettle and walked back to the kitchen, leaving yet a more confused group of people behind you, truth is, you didn't know just how much Loki and you would want to share, you weren't aware of the circumstances and until you were, you'd play the mystery card. 

You came back with a cup of tea for the god and handed it to him.

-How is Asgard? Still obnoxiously sunny?- you laughed lightly.

Thor placed the cup aside for a moment.  
-Asgard...is gone, is was destroyed- 

Your smile faded quickly, your frown formed, Asgard was gone? The entire planet? How? Why? Thank god you hadn't told them anything before speaking with Loki, there was much to talk about, is that how he got himself injured? You two never cared much for Asgard as a place, the last years of your life there hadn't been exactly a bliss, and none of Loki's had been either.

-I'm terribly sorry- you finally spoke at Thor, he too looked disappointed.

-How do you know my brother?-

Poor guy will soon have a long story to hear.  
-I feel that is not my story to share...i think you'd much prefer it if he himself told you about me- you flashed a sincere look at him.

You loved Loki, but you did not want to meddle with his family, not again, that was his mess to clean, or theirs, better said.  
-Loki said he'd be safe here- Thor stated -I need to get in touch with my fellow Avengers, there's new danger out there that needs to be taken care of.-

Once again your smile shrunk as you felt the tingle of your cunning telling you who "new danger" was.  
-It's not new...not at all.- you breathed in, worry forming in your chest as you replayed the venomous past.

-Thanos...- you mumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dont be afraid, you don't need to worry about Thanos, not yet 😏


	3. A Child

About an hour had gone by of Thor telling you about Ragnarok, about his father, that struck a nerve in you, you wondered how Loki felt. You evaded every question he threw at you, your cunning, that always present sixth sense your sorcery had gifted you with, told you it was best if Loki got to do the talking first, and you couldn't agree more.

Nevertheless Thor didn't seem angered or annoyed at you constantly returning his every hit, he was rather intrigued, and he was much more fun than Loki always described him to be, no, you had never met the god of thunder before, when you first met Loki you loathed the royal family, from that point on there weren't many chances to meet them, and Loki wasn't exactly the "come to my parent's for dinner" type of man.

-I wish you would at least tell me how you and my brother met- Thor said in an inquisitive tone.

You laughed lightly at the memory, Loki had sneaked out of the palace after a fit with, yes, his father, and found his way to you. He taught you magic in exchange for escape, back then you weren't in control of your strength, you made a deal, and the rest is history...  
-Common interests- you told Thor, never losing your smile.

It was nice having some good company, Thor had assured you him and his super club could take on Thanos, you had your doubts, but didn't express them, not yet. All would fit into place when Loki woke up.

Speaking of the devil, you heard rustling and an exasperated groan from the bedroom.

-I think someone's up- you got up from your seat. Thor went to stand and you raised your hand.  
-Let me, you know how cranky he can get- 

Thor looked confused, yet again, you couldn't get enough of the confused expressions on people's faces, you loved to imagine what he was thinking.

A hint of excitement and nervousness peaked at your chest before you stepped into the room, your fingers grazed the pendant lightly as you opened the door.

Ah, there he was, that bratty little bitch.

Leaning against the headboard with a very annoyed expression, scanning the room, you knew he didn't like it, he might've hated being a part of a royal family, but everyone knew he loved being a royal. Your own gaze travelled through his body, had he gotten bigger or had you forgotten just how wide his shoulders were? His eyes landed on you quickly. Iceberg blue.

-Syg...- he mumbled, his voice dry and gruff.

You couldn't help but smile. 

-Loki...- you nodded at him and closed the door behind you.

You walked over to the side of his good arm, the other being supported by an improvised sling of your making, you gathered your skirt in your arms and sat by the edge of the bed, his hair messy and dirty, forming wild locks that fell to his shoulders, you ran your fingers through one of them, and then down his temple checking on his eyebrow cut, and down his cheek, now cupping it as his eyes admired your face, your mind drifting back to all your time with him, and all of the time without him, and how far you had felt him from you. Tears stung the corner of your eyes as you remembered the time some years ago when he faked his death, and how terrifying it felt.

-How do you feel?- you said as to distract you from the memory.

His signature smirk curled on his lips, and after five long years, they found yours. Desperate breathings were drawn by each of you at first, his lips were warm, and soft, and so familiar you lost yourself in nostalgia; the kiss slowed down as he cupped your face and drew his fingers up your jaw into your hair, your lips and tongues slowly dancing rhythmically as to savor every second making it as long as you could.  
You pulled away, pecking him at least three times before stopping, and you both smiled against each other's mouths.

-Best I've felt in 5 years...- he said, soft and low.

You bit your lip and chuckled, your eyes still closed, afraid that you'd open them and he wouldn't be there, again.

-You scared me...- 

He pulled away from your face to look at you with concern.  
-I think I've been through worse- he cocked a brow.

You laughed.  
-Not today, although you looked terrible today, 3 years ago, you died...and i felt it, it was terrible.- you whispered.

-I'm sorry my darling...- he kissed you again- i had to...-

You huffed.  
-Yeah, I thought you'd say that...- you kissed him back.  
-Mm by the way, your brother happens to be in the living room-

A deep sigh, you chuckled.

-Tell him he can leave-

You lightly hit his arm and shook your head.  
-He has questions darling, questions you need to answer, once and for all...-

-He doesn't need to know everything.-

-Maybe not but you knew he'd have to find out about us sooner or later...-

-He really doesn't have to know anything.-

-Loki.-

His eyes met yours and you cocked a brow at him.  
-He's worried, and confused. And he's your brother. And i know that means something to you even if you like to pretend it does not.-

-I just don't feel it is necessary for him to know every detail surrounding my life, he didn't seem to care until now.-

You tilted your head, deep inside him, you knew he really thought that still, which was painful.

-Now that's not fair isn't it...- you said softly at him, his gaze pulled away from yours. Until now, Thor didn't even think Loki had an entire life apart from him, even less, secrets within that same life, of course his curiosity had sparked.

You stood up and started walking to the door.

-Where are you going?-

-Either you talk to him or I'll sleep on the couch- you stopped by the door. You would do that. He knew you would.

-Really? How fair of you to force me to tell him everything about me- he teased you, had he forgotten just for how long you two had known each other??   
Decades, that's how long.

-Put the silver tongue back in your mouth, you can tell him as far you'd like, it's your story, but he deserves answers and he deserves the long delayed truth- you opened the door and pointed your finger at him- You're not a child so why do i have to scold you like one??-

You turned and left, you didn't stay to see his reaction although you could feel the devilish smirk on his face, you weren't angry, he knew that, it was all in good fun.  
Thor didn't know that tho, and he heard the last part. A very shocked expression forming in his brow, last time he had seen Loki get scolded it was by his mother, yet again, decades ago.

-I'm sure he'd be happy to talk to you soon, would you like to come back when he's ready?- you leaned against a chair.

The sun was setting and the day was closer to ending, you knew Thor needed to rest too, and that he needed to attend matters with these Avengers people.

-Is there no chance we can speak now?- he asked standing up.

-Something tells me he isn't ready for it right now, -you started walking towards the door, it's not that you wanted to kick him out, it's that you didn't want a cat fight of two tired gods in your cabin- Loki has a long story to tell, i know you have your questions and concerns, and i know you love and care for him, i can promise you, you'll get the answers you need, but what Loki needs, is time.-

You came to a stop at the edge of the front porch, giving him a consoling look and a pat on the shoulder, and you concluded.  
-I think you know that- you smiled at him and he chuckled shortly.

-Thank you, for your assistance and your company- he grabbed your shoulder.

-Thank you- you smiled- for bringing him back- 

He nodded and started walking away.  
-I really hope i get to know more about you in the future- he said over his shoulder.

He has no idea  
-Thor!- he turned and you bit your cheek at the information you were going to share.  
-Tell Heimdall i said hi...- you smiled wickedly as you went back inside, once again his mouth fell open in shock and confusion.  
Priceless.


	4. I Missed This

You sat next to Loki in the bed, his cape still under him, your body and legs perpendicular to his with yours over his thighs, you had been like this for about 15 minutes, just feeling your bond flow around you, buzzing with re encounter.

And then you slowly remembered there was a lot to talk about.

-Your brother told me...- you started, softly.

-About what exactly?-

-Everything- you breathed in- Odin, your sister- a pause- ...Thanos.-

His eyes pulled away again, he had a habit of doing that, his jaw tensed. After a second or two his gaze returned to yours.  
-What did he tell you about Thanos?-

-That he did this to you, that you fought, and you lost people...He's getting closer to collecting the stones...he's gotten more dangerous, hasn't he?- now your jaw was tense.

-Come here darling...- his voice slow.

You moved besides him, leaning gently against his chest being mindful of the soreness in his body, his fingers lifted your chin.

-We fought him, and we stopped him, and I'll make sure he's permanently stopped.- he drifted to a serious whisper, he leaned closer and brought his lips to yours in a smooth kiss.

You knew he was evading the subject, you'll let it slide, just for now, mostly because his finger brushed the line of your bottom lip and you felt his lips slowly travelling to your jaw, then down to your neck, now with deeper, rougher touches, his index finger still holding your chin up for him to enjoy the length of your neck freely.  
When he reached your collarbone his fingers left your chin to tug on the sleeve of your shirt, exposing your shoulder, he ran his lips up from there to your hair, barely grazing the skin with his mouth, the motion sending a chill so strong you gasped quietly.

-Can i take a bath?-

You fluttered your lashes.  
-What?-

-A bath, i feel rather scrawny- he smirked at you.

Teaser.  
You shot him a death glare, he wasn't wrong, but you knew he placed his actions in that exact order to tease you.

-Sure, give me a minute alright?-

You stood up and left the bedroom, stepping into the bathroom to get the water running, once that was on you left it to fill and went back into the bedroom. A normal night would consist of rather warmer sleeping clothes, not now though, there had been a change of plans.  
You loved this game...

A/N: SMUT AHEAD‼️Stop scrolling 15 y/os

Facing away from him you tugged at the hem of your skirt, slowly pulling it down to your hips then slowing your speed to a painfully slow motion as you bended forward , your ass up and your back arched as you reached your ankles.  
You came back up with a smile, you could almost see the smirk on his face and the anticipation on his eyes. You moved to your top, lifting it over your shoulders and letting it fall beside you as you shook your hair out of it to add to the show, your fingers hooked on your bra and undid it to slide it down as your lips curled up in a closed smile.

You turned around, he looked up at you quickly, an instant of surprise on his eyes, he didn't expect you to do that, even less did he expect you to start walking towards the bed, your panties and your necklace the only items on your body, you leaned close to his torso on all fours, the pendant hanging loosely along with your breasts as you got closer, you wanted to see how much he could resist. And he was skilled at that.

As he opened his mouth to speak you reached under the pillow to retrieve a pair of satin shorts, standing up leaving him to swallow his words as you slipped them in and opened a drawer to pull the sweater you had on this morning.

-Don't stand too quickly, your body might feel weak- you smiled at him.

You waited until he stood up to see if he could walk on his own given the relatively fresh wound on his side, and slowly but surely, after giving you a lustful death glare, he made his way to the bathroom.  
He was barefoot but his pants were still on, yet another opportunity to keep playing. He went to undo them and you stepped forward and tugged at the hem, lowering yourself as you took his pants off, leaving him in his underwear; once they reached his calves he spoke.

-Look at me-

You did.

He grabbed your chin.

You stroke his thighs.

He gathered your hair.

You bit your lip.

His dick got hard, and you stood up.

A lust driven tug of war you considered your own personal dance of courtship. Besides regular dancing, which wasn't half as fun. You reached for a towel and heard his harsh sigh and his underwear coming off, he then gripped onto the bathtub with his good arm and lowered himself, hissing at the contact of the hot water and his fresh wound.

You helped him clean up, mostly with his hair since he couldn't raise both arms, you massaged the dirt and grease out his raven hair and rinsed it off watching the dense foam slide down his shoulders and broad chest, he already looked much more relaxed and comfortable, your hands ran to his chest, stroking slowly and intently.

His hand caught your wrist and pulled you slightly closer to his face, he sat straight and angled his face down to look at yours, he was that tall. The wet black ends of his hair sat on his shoulders contrasting with the now clean, pale skin, and his lips now had a  
pinker tone from the hot water, the cut on his eyebrow already healing over the blue eyes, even lighter than his skin.  
The sight alone made your mouth water and your thighs press together.

Your lips crashed together again, both of you trying to control your eagerness, even if you were one tongue slide away from riding him like an animal. 

He stopped the kiss and split your mouths, but didn't pull away.  
-Surrendering?- you whispered.

You felt the corners of his mouth widen in a big grin and he chuckled lowly, you had forgotten what that sounded like, now you felt like the one surrendering.  
That was how powerful he was. And heavens did you live for it.

You felt him stand up and grab the towel, you waited as he turned his back to you to dry himself, not letting you enjoy the front view.  
You smiled to yourself as you grabbed more gauzes to patch on his wound, which was already loosing his raw appearance, he placed the towel around his waist and you patted down the opening of the soon to be scar.

-You're still a fast healer, that's a good sign- you mumbled.

-Well, i have other business to attend to- he looked down at you and you smirked.

-Well you're taking your sweet time aren't you my dear?- you mocked.

-Bed, now.- 

You won.   
-Yes your highness- you said sweetly, but eagerly.

You walked into the bedroom once again and folded his cape to place it over the dresser, you let yourself fall to the bed leaning back on your palms when he came in, keeping his eyes on you as he stealthily made his way to you like a true calculating predator.

-Always such a tease...- he started- take the bottoms off.- 

You pull the satin shorts down lifting your hips and letting them fall on the floor, returning to your previous position.

His hands gripped on your thighs and spread them apart, he lowered down to your calves and lifted them to place your feet over the edge of the bed. He stroked your thighs, gently gripping on them and pressing his lips on the insides, torturing you with soft, slow kisses going down to your warm cunt.  
Your breath hitched in anticipation when he finally placed a kiss to your mound over your panties, and his index and middle fingers traced a line down your slit, the fabric already wet with your lust.

-Already dripping for me...it's been too long for you hasn't it?- he closed his eyes, speaking against the thin fabric, then he looked up, and you nodded.

-My needy little girl, poor sweet thing...- 

With that last deep voiced statement he pulled your panties down, following them with his tongue, and your mouth fell open at the sudden contact, once he reached your clit he stopped there and sucked lightly and a needy moan escaped your mouth.  
He kissed down your wet slit, sucking your folds into his mouth and massaging you with his lips, his tongue ran all the way up to your clit again and he sucked harder, your back arched at the tingle going up your core and you gasped.

You could feel him smile against you and he pulled away, you were about to let out a whimper when he slid one of his fingers inside you and started pumping it at a delicious pace, another deep moan went out your mouth followed by a hum and he chuckled and sighed.

-I missed this...- he groaned- Having you come undone under my touch, such a beautiful sight to see.-

He sucked at your pulsing clit yet again, your walls clenching around his long finger, you threw you head back, his tongue teased at your bud while his teeth held it gently in place and your hand slid through his damp locks pulling him towards you, feeling your release closer by the second as you let out yet another string of moans.

-F..aah, faster- you blurted.

-Slower?- his finger lost speed.

You groaned and glared at him, your hair falling in your face.  
-Faster.- you stated.

He pulled his finger out and before you could protest he quickly shut you up with his lips eating at your mouth, his hand gripping your throat in place, your tongues attacked each other and your tugged at his hair bringing him down with you, he hissed at the pressure on his shoulder when he pressed his forearm on the mattress by your side, hovering over you only deepening his kiss.  
He lowered his hips and you felt the desperate throbbing of his cock on your folds, you buckled your hips upwards, stroking him with your hot wet cunt, he moaned loudly against your mouth and you smirked. 

Your hand gripped at his hard big cock and you felt it twitch, you laughed against his lips.

-It's been too long for you hasn't it?- you mimicked his words and he sneered.

You led him to your entrance, pushing the head in, already feeling him stretch you out, you had forgotten how big he was, sure you remembered he was big but the feeling of it was surprising every time.  
He slid into you with no effort, grunting at your tight pussy gripping on him, his forehead pressed against yours, both of your mouths agape in harsh breaths and gutural moans as he fucked you hard, pumping your hot cunt, stretching your walls out in sweet pleasure. Your toes curling around his hips, his biceps flexing as he pounded into you, fast and steady making you jerk back and forth on the bed.

-Oh fuck you feel so good- you huffed, panting at the feeling of his dick in your gut.

-Show me how good- his thrusts became faster, skin slapping against your thighs, the wetness of your cunt getting louder.  
-Tell me...agh, tell me how much you like it-

Your back arched and you gripped on his biceps, feeling your tits bounce under your sweater, you moaned and whimpered, constant tingles running on your lower belly.

-Hmm i, oh fuck...i love it, oh gods...- you stuttered.

You heard him growl and his arm slipped under you, he sat on his knees and brought you up to straddle him, the new angle hitting your spot just right as you moved your hips to meet his thrusts. His face buried in the crook of your neck, releasing hot breaths against it and he hugged your figure, pulling you so close to him you thought you might merge together, and you were just fine with that.  
Your hand tangled on his hair while the other hugged his figure and scratched at his back, the shivers of pleasure becoming too much to bare as his dick buried into you, deeply, slowly, intimately, yet desperate.

-Loki...fuck, im gon- im gonna cum...- you leaned against his hair.

He pressed his mouth next to your ear.  
-What was that darling?-

-Mm, im gonna cum, ahh!- you hissed.

-Say my name.- 

-Loki...- you choked a whimper as he moved inside you.

-Say my name- he sneered against you, his breaths uneven and raspy. He was close as well.

-Fuck Loki!- the hold on his hair tightened, and so did his grip on your waist.

-Say my name!- he growled loud and deep against your neck, his thrusts became merciless and white spots clouded your vision. 

-AHH! Gods Loki!!- you cried out, your hold on his hair so tight your knuckles were white.

Your legs quivered and you tensed around him as you let your orgasm roll, the two of you holding onto each other for dear life and at the same time letting go into the blinding pleasure.  
His grip on your waist and thigh so hard you knew there'd be bruises, his last few thrusts deep and firm as he became undone.

You held each other until your breaths stopped shuddering, your embrace never ceasing or breaking, feeling as one, finally, after five long years being stars away, your bodies were finally tangled into each other, in hopes to never be separated again.

Coming back from your daze, you waited for it, because old habits die hard.  
And you felt him start to chuckle, his shoulders moving against you as it grew.

Ah, there it is...you thought.

And you felt his laugh, deep, guttural and strong, and you giggled yourself, he couldn't help it. He never could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First smut I've ever written, i hope you enjoyed yourselves   
> Also if the after sex laugh reminded you of a certain reddit someone, your secret's safe w me 😌✨


	5. My Goddess

Loki's POV:

He was longing for this.  
For your touch, for the silk smoothness of your lips and the perfect wetness of your tongue mixing against his, for your playful yet serious scolding, and for the way you hair sprawled on the bed when you slept.

Last night, when he fucked you senseless after the traditional long game of teasing, he was so desperate to have you again, thinking of all those nights when he couldn't have you spasming around him made him go almost feral, and he let himself go, he didn't even bother to slip another finger in you before going insane.

His desperation had gotten over him in many senses yesterday, more than he was okay with. He could've let Thor take him to the Avengers' compound straight ahead but no, his agonizing and impatient self had gotten too worked up and needed to see you, bringing with him his brother, and as if that wasn't enough, a few of his friends along. Now he was exposed.   
Imbecile.

He hated being sloppy, it wasn't his way of playing, there was never a moment when he wasn't two steps ahead. Even during the discovery of his sister and the complete destruction of his planet. He also hated how you were always right. He knew he'd have to let his brother in, the thought alone made him cringe, he felt naked.

To be fair he was naked.

After last night's anticipation and lust washed over, you both had drifted to sleep naked, entangled under the sheets, you had taken your sweater off in a need for your skin to feel his, the low temperature of the night a mere breeze compared to the warmth of two bodies that boiled as they were finally reunited.

Loki turned his face from the ceiling to you, you were clinging to his bicep, your face buried against it into the pillow, the heavy covers revealing the perfect tracing of your collarbones and shoulders, your hair flowed behind you and over your face in shiny warm strands, your lips in a mauve tone from the sudden burst of touch they felt yesterday after having denied it to them for so long; the golden of the morning sun draped like the most delicate blanket over your body making you look ethereal.  
My goddess...

Loki's attention went back to your shoulders, the edges of old cruel venom scars drawn on your back bringing back a painful memory, then again he had so many of those.  
He wasn't perfect, but you had had so much patience with him, and he started to show himself, only for you, without really noticing. You became one of his scarce lines of fidelity and real support, a friend, the only friend he had back then, most nights it felt as though in such an extension of galaxies and shining stars there was only you two, he had forgotten the last time he felt connected to a person, mostly at the time when Thor had grown arrogant and thirsty for battles and glory, in a very different way than he had.  
And with you he wasn't the second, he didn't have to pretend and hold a facade, and it felt liberating.

Then Thanos appeared.

In his doubts he saw an opportunity, he twisted and meddled with his mind until what was left was pure rage and sorrow, fueling his insecurities and his painful past, manipulating the truth, that he had no value to Odin other than as a trophy from a bloody victory, that his mother was on it as well the entire time, that he didn't represent family to Thor, he represented competition...that you weren't special, you were a distraction.

But nevertheless you stuck with him, even as Thanos tortured him into submission, you found him and took his place every time he wasn't around, quite literally being poisoned for the sake that he wasn't, until he managed to break him; then he was gone. And he turned his back on the world, Thanos managed to make him question everyone, even you. And for so long he was convinced you didn't love him, how could you? He was a monster, a beast that relished in the disaster he left behind wherever he went.

You shuffled against him, he heard you take a deep breath, slowly waking up, his attention was back on you as you fluttered your eyes open to close them again.

-Morning darling...-

Your lips curled in a small smile.  
-Hmm-

Your hands let go of his arm and he took it as permission to move, carefully sliding it under you as you came closer, your hand rested on his chest, tracing lazy lines on his sternum, he placed his hand over yours, feeling the familiar softness of the back of your hand.

-Where's your locket?- he heard you say, a bit more woken up.

He glanced down and quickly realized the necklace had made it's way to hang in the back of his neck rather than the front, probably in his sleep, and he reached to find the locket, re positioning it where it should be.

It had been long since he'd seen it to be honest, it usually hung concealed under the layers of his leather armor, safe and sound from anyone's suspecting eyes, or his family's nosy customs.

He watched you as you took the pendant you had hand carved so long ago with two fingers and circled it with your thumb a few times, his eyes drifted down to the carvings by his own hand that adorned your locket.  
Quite literally, you held each other's souls between your fingers.

-I never liked how this turned out- you observed at your work.

-I quite like it- he said in a soft, gruff voice.

Loki watched your smirk form as your eyes met his, he took the scene in once more, your hair falling messy on one side, a few wild strands draped on your other shoulder, your lips were puffy and so were your eyes with their eternal glow, your forearms were holding you up, slightly squeezing your breasts together, perfectly complimented by the golden necklace.

His arm wrapped over your back, stroking the bitter memory of your scars. Scars you had willingly suffered from for him, he had neglected you so badly since those scars were forged, he tortured himself every night the nightmares clouded his sleep; but he'd never make those mistakes again, that side of the monster had been growing further away every day since Ragnarok, now he had you again, and he felt freedom once more. He hugged your figure, bringing you closer to him as tears threatened to sting the corners of his eyes, he placed soft kisses on your shoulder, he felt your hand on his hair and the smile on your face. The cold metal of your locket pressing against his chest, against his heart.

He'd never let him hurt you again, not as long as he lived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to give you guys a bit more insight into Loki's side of this love, it's a classic "Mean guy that isn't mean just for you" kinda thing, except this is Ragnarok Loki so yeah he's getting better 😌✨


	6. Comfortably Powerful

-How's your wound?- you asked as you heard him step into the kitchen, where you were making two cups of tea.

You had been out of the bedroom for a few hours now, the day had gotten darker since the morning, a sign that it might rain. Loki had thrown on the leather pants of his suit and had a plain black t shirt with long sleeves on you had gotten long ago, along with more clothes, being positive that you'd see him again, and here you were.

-Sore- he answered after a second or two.

You shrugged in question.  
-Just sore?- you knew he was tough and all but he could be a bit more descriptive.

He squinted at you.  
-It hurts when i fuck you-

You huffed and squinted back at him.  
Funny...you thought, That's what i thought after the first time you fucked me.

-Well then stop fucking me- you cocked a brow.

He laughed.  
-You think you'd be able to resist darling?-

You expected him to say that.  
-I was alone here for 5 years before you showed up, darling.- you smiled mockingly at him.

He stepped closer, slowly, in his signature Loki strides, buzzing intimidation and confidence around him, you loved it when he did that.

-And you're telling me...- he started, his fingers brushed your hair aside to get a view on your neck- ...that in 5 long years...- he leaned over, you turned slightly as his hot breaths hovered your skin-...never once did you gave in to your need for pleasure...- he kissed the crook of your neck and you could feel your breaths go uneven-...for me?- he finished.

Your pulse was over the moon, maybe he knew already, you wouldn't give him the pleasure of showing him that he was right; many times had you touched yourself to his memory, and it was never half as good as him filling you up.  
But you knew he liked it when you bantered back, and so did you. You knew he could never decide which he liked more, when you purred under his spell or when you bit back until he broke.

Your eyes found his icy blue ones.  
-Did you? Your highness?- 

His jaw tensed but you could tell in the glimmer of his eyes that he enjoyed it, and under his intense stare and his broad shoulders, a part of you hoped he'd lift you on the counter and pounded you until your legs gave up.  
But he didn't, of course. That wouldn't be fun.  
The kettle whispered loudly and suddenly, startling you, you looked down to see Loki's fingers quickly retrieving from an extended position and you shot him a glare he returned with a smirk. You turned around to pour the tea and handed him the cup, sitting up on the counter and looking out the window before facing him again.

-So will you tell me how you avoided being imprisoned by this grandmaster guy?-

-My brother didn't tell you? And i thought you two had become friends already- he said sarcastically.

-Your brother said he has no clue how you did it- you furrowed your brows.

Loki rolled his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh, as if he was repeating himself for the fifth time.  
-I used my charms, and my wit. Simple as that.-

-Did you sleep with him?-

You strategically waited for him to take a sip to say that, just to watch what had unveiled before you.  
The 6 ft 2 literal God of Mischief, choking on his tea. You giggled wickedly.

He cleared his throat.  
-No i didn't.-

-I know you didn't- you chuckled.

-You would've liked him, such a weird individual, borderline exasperating, although I'll admit, having him as a contact was comfortable to say the least-

You smiled at him, and crossed your ankles.  
-Tell me more...-

-About?-

-About...all this time-

You loved hearing him speak, his clever comments and how he tricked everyone with his silver tongue. He was as good at storytelling as he was at manipulation, he always had you hooked at his anecdotes, between the dark chocolate voice, the eloquent tone and the witty speech, he had the whole combo.   
He was everything and more. Fun and stern, a troublemaker and a leader, mischief and love.

He paused his talking to place the now empty cup on the sink, you jumped off the counter and walked behind him, wrapping your arms around his tall figure, and buried your face on his back, inhaling his scent. He held your arms and turned to face you, lifting your face and leaning down he met your lips halfway in a passionate deep kiss, and you hummed in acceptance.

-Oh- he started between kisses- we also met a Valkyrie-

You pulled away, looking up at him with wide eyes, your mouth was agape and he smiled at the sight, a Valkyrie.

-How...how??- you blinked.

-Somehow she survived- he raised his brows. 

-Oh my gods...- you sighed.

-I thought you'd like that- he grinned down at you.

-I have to meet her!- you shrugged as if you were stating the obvious.

Loki's grin got bigger at your exclamation.  
-I'm guessing you will very soon, although she's not very fond of me-

Your brows dropped and you tilted your head.  
-What did you do?-

-I may have tampered around her memories, just to give her a little push- 

-A little push...?- you asked in a warning tone.

-To help us fight Hela.- he cocked his head towards you.

-Just for that?- your tone changed to defiance, on purpose, he pressed his lips together and looked away, then back at you as you waited for the answer.

-Fine, she had me cornered in a fight, but I wanted to talk her into it.- he defended. 

You shook your head.  
-Who started the fight?-

-She did.-

A beat.

-...I did- he sighed- She was taunting me.-

He looked defeated, like a child that got caught tasting from his father's beer jug, and you slowly shook your head grinning. You bit your lip and smiled, he could be tall and scary but he'd always be a petty little brat.  
Your hands pulled down at his neck and he leaned down, caressing your hips. Your lips found his in a slow kiss that quickly turned passionate, his hands grabbed your waist pulling you closer and he slipped his tongue in, you moaned in his mouth, you just couldn't keep your hands off each other, who could blame you?

-LOKI OF ASGARD!- 

A distant call was heard and you pulled away, frowning at him, and he frowned back.  
You turned over your shoulder then back at him with a confused expression.  
-You have a visit...- you said.

He pecked at your lips.  
-I don't know who it is but I'll kill them.- he huffed, clearly frustrated.

You chuckled and walked out of the kitchen, not before you heard him sigh in growing anger, you felt a tug of energy as you opened the door partially.  
When you swung your head out you saw a tall man a few feet away from the porch, his hands were on his side in fists, his chin up and his expression stern, he wore deep blue robes and a red cloak.   
He was in a fighting stance.

-Hello...- you started.

-Who are you?- 

Bit harsh but okay.  
-I'm Sigyn. Who are you?- you squinted at him.

-My name is Doctor Strange. I'm looking for Loki, of Asgard.-

You thought for a second, was he from Midgard? It certainly seemed like it, from his straight forward defying stance. His cloak shifted, but there was no wind, you tilted your head.  
-And why didn't you knock?- you didn't give him time to answer, you just wanted to mock his predisposition.  
-And who's that?- you continued.

He squinted at you, shifting slightly at the cloak, clearly confused as to who you were and why you were being chatty.  
-This...is the Cloak of Levitation...-

The man scanned you and your surroundings in a frown, now that you had had your fun maybe it was time to let him in, well, maybe one more.  
-Are you a friend or an enemy?- 

He stepped closer.  
-That solely depends on him.- he stated, serious.

You looked up at him and cocked your head, raising your eyebrows and shrugging with your eyes.  
-An enemy then, come in!- you exclaimed and opened the door at once.

He was utterly confused by now, blinking as he carefully stepped in the house, you knew he came to fight, and you knew that if it really depended on Loki, he was probably an enemy, considering he interrupted an increasingly hot make out session.  
-Darling!- you called out, confusing the man even more.  
Just like you thought, the energy thickened when Loki saw him, yet he looked relaxed as he walked in the room, a warning look on Doctor Strange's eyes, and a playful one on Loki's. As always.

-Strange...-

-Loki.- 

-OH!- you exclaimed, the memory of Loki's story popping up in your mind.  
They both turned to you as their tension broke.  
-Is he the amateur sorcerer?? No that's not what you called him...second rate!! That's it- you snapped your fingers and concluded, nodding to yourself.

Strange stared at Loki then back at you, growing impatient, but you and him had all day.

-Alright now, i warned your brother about you coming back to Earth so I'd like to know what is it you're doing here and why you chose to bring a friend along this time.- 

For a second you thought he'd call you his helper, someone had done that before, it didn't end well, you lost count after you broke the fourth rib...

-I am more than proud to tell you that my brother himself brought me here willingly- Loki smiled.

-And i was here long before he arrived- you smiled with him- Now what is the problem exactly?-

-Loki is one of the individuals i have my eye on that could represent a threat to this planet, he isn't welcome here.-

-I can assure you, Doctor Strange, if Loki and i wanted to be a threat to this planet you would already know...- you tilted your head towards him.

-I don't think you represent a threat as much as he does.- he stated at you.

You turned slowly to glare at him, and Loki chuckled, he knew what was coming. You were a fighter before you were a sorcerer, therefore you were competitive, no one got to make assumptions about your strength without your permission. Not even Loki. You were patient, until you weren't.

Oh, I'll show you...

In a matter of seconds you twisted your arms feeling the energy flow through you, and you transported yourself and Strange to the back of the house, near the start of the forest, you put your arms down and rolled your shoulders now in your battle suit, it had been ages since you wore it and it felt comfortably powerful, you hair was up on a ponytail with two braids on the side and your fingers lingered with a blue glow around them. The cowl drifting over your shoulder on your side drifted slowly in the increasing wind of the grey day.

A/N: Did i design a battle suit for Sigyn from scratch because I couldn't find anything that fit my imagination? Yes. Yes i did.

You relaxed your posture, your chin up and your hands relaxed, like Loki had taught you. Strange stood about 20 feet from you, his posture straight and his brow furrowed. By the house, an already very satisfied Loki stood looking at you, then at Strange.

-How long have you trained for Doctor Strange?-

His gaze shifted between you and Loki, suspicious that he would also come at him. You were growing even more tired of him underestimating you...or maybe you just missed having fun.

-About the equivalent of a hundred years- he spoke.

You smiled and chuckled.  
-There is no such thing as the "equivalent" of a hundred years. You either trained for a hundred years, or you didn't.- you stated, sympathetically.

-I don't think i agree- 

-Okay, show me then...- 

You waited as he hesitated for a second, then finally his fingers came up together and in a few twists he conjured the sparks of a spell around them, and once again he stood in a fighting stance. The humming presence of your magic slid through your fingers, moving them in preparation as you took a few slow steps closer. The man lunged forward slightly and shot a wave at you, your diverted it almost as quickly as it came, leaving the magic to vanish in the air behind you, the burst of energy blowing on your hair.

Now Strange started to get the idea of your strength, and went in harder, now propelling two rounded patterns of spell in his knuckles he stood in front of you, he wasn't much of an attacker, he didn't initiate, you noticed. You had to admit it was a bit disappointing.  
But much more fun.

You lunged at him with shots of energy, small, controlled, but strong enough, he used his spells as shields at first, either stopping or dodging your shots;  
the flares of magic crashing emitting sounds of blazing swooshes.  
When he got more confortable he charged back, trying to hit you with the edges of his spell. You hunched at the first and stopped the second with the plaque on your forearm, your fingers moved swiftly and you unveiled your arm from your chest at him, striking with a shock of teal looking sorcery.

He stumbled back, almost falling as you circled around him as he regained his posture and conjured his next attack, this time more aggressive in the form of a whip. It was fast, but not as fast as you. Your cloak flew as your shadow as you rapidly bended and hunched dodging every one of his hits; putting illusions to work you left a carbon copy of you in front of him, an effective, meticulously crafted distraction. In a second you were on his back and just as he was about to turn you let the energy come through your leg as you kicked up in perfect balance, sending him off flying meters away, he caught himself in the air with the help of the cloak.

You smirked to yourself as your hands and legs brought you up, arms to your sides you collected energy in between your palms, glowing with power you sent it off and shot at him earning a grunt of dizziness. With no effort he re conjured his whip and aimed at your legs, a bit too obviously for a well trained sorcerer as he claimed to be.

But it soon became clear to you it was a trap, when you dodged at the whip on your leg another one came to wrap on your right arm, and then another one to your left, and he joined them in a tight grip around your body. You twisted your fists in a failed attempt and he brought you down to the ground, you felt the cold dirt and grass of the mountain collide with your body, hard.

Maybe he deserved a bit more credit.   
You thought as you got up again, breathes now harsher with effort, Strange still levitated some feet away and up from the ground, looking down at you with a concerned yet proud expression.

-Are we done?- he exclaimed at you.

You looked up at him and breathed in, your fingers swayed as you brought your hands up to eye height and exhaled, you drew a circle with one arm, the other one punching through it. 

A blue glow emited from withing your fist and knocked the air around you in a rapid growling sound, bringing the sorcerer down to ground much harder than you did, his body rolling from the push, you strolled forward, now satisfied and more calm, and stretched your arms forward, forming fists and bringing them together, creating a hold on his body that you held with one palm.

-We are now.- you stated.

On your peripheral you saw Loki approach, a proud air in his walk, a bit more than usual, Strange relaxed in defeat under your hold.

-I underestimated your girlfriend...but the matter is not resolved.-

Loki frowned and raised an eyebrow at him.

-She's not my girlfriend...- you felt his arm behind you and his hand around your waist.

\- She's my wife.-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hnngg first fight scene and im not sure about it but oh well


	7. Broken Glass Look

You had to give the man some credit, he was a good sorcerer, definitely not a hundred-years-of-training sorcerer.  
Your palm relaxed as well as your hold and the buzzing energy flowing through your arm quieted down to the usual low hum traveling through your body, Strange lowered into the ground and sighed.

-I think the matter is very well resolved.- Loki sneered at him.

You eyed him with a fun yet serious stare as he turned, he started to walk back to the house, you turned to Strange and offered an olive branch.

-You're skilled for a human Strange- you nodded courtly.

He nodded back.

-Thank you-his brow furrowed, although you actually hadn't seen them un furrow since he came in the house, the best part of being married to the God of Lies is probably watching the astonishment on people's faces when they find out. The worst part is the conversations after.

-I'm sorry, if you don't mind me asking...- he started, looking for the right way to phrase it- how did you...how is it...i never thought Loki would be married, no offense.- he finished as best as he could.

A short chuckle escaped you.  
-Is it so hard to picture?-

-Again no offense but he is a mas- he cut himself short- ...are you aware of his business on earth?-

He was going to say mass murderer, you partly thought it was nice of him to soften the blow at you, and you partly were offended that he assumed Loki was hiding what happened on Midgard to you. Sometimes you forgot Lies was literally on his title.

-Are you aware of his business with Thanos?- you gulped out the name.

He furrowed his brows even more, if that was possible.  
-You obviously don't, I'm beginning to think your eye on certain threats isn't so well put after all- you flashed him a smile- I know what you're thinking, Doctor, that Loki has me under some manipulative spell, hiding secrets from me like from everybody else, but i can assure you the last time he kept a secret from me, well, he regretted it, just like you did today...-

-I'm sorry if my comment came out offensive, it wasn't my intention- he interrupted.

-That's fine...- you laughed- Loki isn't a threat unless he has a reason to be, as of right now, i am the only reason for him being here. I wasn't present to see the damage he caused here on your planet, and i also won't apologize in his name, it's not my responsibility to do so. But i can assure you, Loki and i have no intentions nor interest on "being a threat".- you spoke reassuringly, with a calm soft expression on your face.

-I think you can understand why i can't take your word for it- he looked at you.

-Because he's a murderer?- you raised your brows, surprising him with his own thoughts- So am i Doctor, and im willing to bet so are you...-

-I've murdered in the name of protection, bad people.-

You smiled, either to him or to yourself.  
-So has Loki...-

*******************  
If this Midgardian sorcerer was indeed so committed to the protection of this planet, and this reality as you would shortly find out, you and Loki agreed you had to fill him in on Thanos and the danger he represents, battle was close, merely a spot over the horizon, but close.  
You made your way back to the house as the cold wind picked up and the sky started rumbling in upcoming rain.

-Care for a cup of tea Doctor?- 

He considered.  
-Yes, thank you-

Going inside the house in a battle suit was something you had never done, it felt out of place, like bringing work home in a sort of way, and you quickly noticed how the muted teals of the leather contrasted with the cabin's aesthetic.  
You took off the cowl and the plaques on your shoulder and forearms as well as the sword holster on the back, a more appropriate version of the suit to sit and negotiate alliance.

Now more relaxed and accustomed you all sat in the kitchen, and you wondered where to begin, turning to Loki.  
-I think we should catch him up shouldn't we?-

He turned to look at you, his lips in a thin line.  
-Thanos is a powerful individual, leader of a galactic army and a skilled group of assassins, he's conquered and destroyed worlds in his search for "balance", or so he thinks. For years now he's been trying to collect the Infinity Stones in his search for this balance. These stones are powerful entities older than the universe itself, concentrated into six stones, when one wields them together, the possibilities are unlimited, and one becomes the most dangerous being in the universe. But you're already aware of the stones aren't you Doctor?-

Your eyes met Loki's inquisitive look at Strange, you had no clue what he was talking about, your mind raised rapidly through theories and guesses and at the end, the conclusion. The tug of energy, that one you had felt when Strange was at the door, it didn't come from him, it came from the heavy necklace on his chest. Bastard was holding an Infinity Stone.

-The stone was confided to me and is under my protection.-

-That won't matter Doctor. Not to Thanos.- you shook your head at him.

-I won't leave it with you or anyone else- he stood up, wanting to conclude the subject.

-I thought you smarter than this Strange.- Loki stood as well- I don't care if you die, my problem is, you will. And Thanos will rip that stone from your dead body.-

-What Loki is trying to say...- you intervened- Is that you can't face Thanos and protect the stone alone,- you turned to Loki- None of us can.-

Strange considered your words, his gaze still on Loki, who was now facing you.

-I'll speak to your brother then, until then, the stone stays with me.- 

Loki looked back at him, and you hoped he wouldn't lash out on the man, thankfully he didn't.   
-Suit yourself- he straightened his back and relaxed.

You exhaled.  
Thank gods.

You walked with the Doctor to the front door, you felt you had grown on him, you were genuinely trying to gain his trust, and you could feel you slowly were.

-I'm sure we'll see each other shortly Doctor, Thor will be contacting us any day now- you extended your hand and he shook it.

-We have more pressing matters now, but after this, we'll have to further discuss both of your residences here.-

You smirked at his choice of words, to anyone else they would've been discouraging, but to you they were progress, he came here determined to exile Loki out of yet another planet, but he left with the desire to not only discuss it but to perhaps come to an arrangement.

-Gladly...- you said with a closed smile.

You watched him disappear and turned back into the big cabin, as you came in you found Loki with furrowed brows, skimming through your library, such a foreign sight given how long you hadn't seen him for, and even less how long it had been since you both found yourselves in an ordinary situation; drinking tea, making love, and picking a new book to read.  
You had to keep reminding yourself that he was here. He was here. That feeling of comfort and security that had felt so far away from you, now embracing you tightly and warm with his presence, the loneliness dangling from your neck in the shape of a pendant, now replaced with the beating of a calm soul.

-Did you lose something darling?- he pulled you back from your thoughts, still looking through the titles, hands clasped behind his back.

-I did, but i got it back now...- you replied softly, suddenly noticing the weight of tears at the corners of your eyes.

He turned his gaze at you, engulfing you in those blue eyes only he possessed, and walked closer, a soft expression on his sharp features, he came close until his chest was merely two inches away from you, you looked up, the small tears still in your eyes, his hand cupped your jaw, his fingers long enough that he touched the back of your neck and only his thumb rested on you cheek and down to your jaw, barely caressing the skin.

-You'll never lose me again.- he whispered.

Your lip quivered as your smile grew, and he laid the softest kiss against them, still tracing your soft cheek while doing so, the cold tip of his nose brushing against you.  
He pulled away and you soon realized you were on your tip toes when you lowered yourself, heavens was he tall.  
You giggled softly.

-What?-

-Nothing, nothing...you're just so tall- you giggled again.

He pulled away to look at you with raised brows and a small smile tug on his lips.  
-Your ilusions are still good- he looked down at you, referencing your small fight earlier.

-I've had practice...- you smiled.

-Practice?-

-Yes, you didn't really think i brought all those books from Asgard did you?-

-Of course not, they're from Midgard-

You nodded.  
-There's a town not too far from here, an old woman trades old books for different elements, anything she finds interesting really...- you shrugged- I used illusions every time i met her.-

He placed his index finger under your chin and his thumb over it.  
-Good girl- he teased- can i see it?-

A blue glow raked slowly from your head going down to your toes, he let go of your chin as you did so, you felt the small change draped over you like a second skin. Your hair was now a light muted corn blonde, curly, tamed by a long braid that fell on your shoulder, your eyes were of a deep green and your skin felt slightly older, not much older than your real self, but enough to not be a young woman, still your skin was bright and showered by light freckles along your nose and cheeks.

You extended your arms motioning a "ta daa" at Loki, a mustard sweater falling loosely on your arms and over the loose blue jeans.

-Impressive- he said, eyeing your disguise.

You smiled.  
-I based it off of your mother...- You said in a modulated yet silvery tone that wasn't yours. Coming to think of it, where was his mother?

His eyes shot back up at you and you saw something click in them, the first second you thought maybe he had simply realized who your disguise reminded him of, you quickly discharged that thought when his expression tensed, his smile disappeared as if it were never there, and his gaze fell, not literally, but figuratively, like someone had just shredded a piece of his heart. 

You felt your chest clench at the sight and you quickly forced your illusion away.  
-What is it?-

His chest rose and fell in deep but strong breaths, you saw his jaw tighten and his eyes filled with tears looking into yours.  
-My mother...is dead.-

No thoughts roamed your head, it was blank, nothing. Your chest felt heavy, tight, and the tears in your eyes came back. You knew Frigga, you met her once, she was the only one that knew of you and Loki, back then when it was still a secret. She was dead. How? When?   
Your eyes analyzed Loki's expression, looking, hoping, for any trace of a trick, you would kill him if that were the case, but it was very much real, as real as the broken glass look that took over his eyes, you knew what it was like to lose a mother, but you could never possibly imagine how that would be for Loki. His mother was the one person he trusted, the kindest most understanding woman he had known and loved, the woman that saved your life. And she was gone.

-No...- you managed to whisper.

A single tear fell down Loki's left cheek, although plenty more awaited their turn on his eyes, their blue suddenly contrasting much more as they became bloodshot. In an effort to stop his lip from quivering his lips tugged down in a frown.   
You cupped his face in your hands, wiping the second fallen tear off, and you tugged at him, your arms wrapping around his neck in a hug, he let himself fall against you, and you felt his wet face and his pressed lips against your shoulder, his arms hugging your waist tightly in bottled up sadness.

-I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry...- you repeated.

Sorry that Frigga died, sorry that Loki lost one of the little things he openly cared about, but mostly sorry because you weren't there, because you couldn't stop it, because you couldn't hug him earlier, because you couldn't be with him.   
-I'm so sorry...- you said, yet again, as you realized how guilty you felt.

-It was my fault.- his broken voice came- I told them...i told them where to go...i was spiteful, and they found her, she wasn't supposed to be there- a sob hit your collarbone- i didn't know...-

You closed your eyes, you knew him, of course he felt guilty, he's always felt guilty of everything out of his control, if something...or someone, got caught in the fire of his actions that wasn't supposed to, it weighted on him.  
You weren't there, but you were sure it wasn't his fault, not this time, not Frigga. He loved her too much.

-I told her...i- i told her she wasn't my mother...- his tone full of spite towards himself.

You knew by the slight anger on his voice that it was getting to him, and your fingers ran softly through his black hair.  
-It wasn't your fault Loki...- 

-She had tears in her eyes. She believed me. She truly believed i thought she wasn't my mother.-

The aching in your heart grew at his words, you pulled him away, cupping his face once again, you looked into his eyes, you caressed his left cheek.  
-No she didn't. Loki, listen to me...You are her son, and she knew that, and she loved you. You couldn't have possibly foreseen what happened to her, she would never want you to remember her like that, and she certainly would never blame you.- you shook your head slowly.

His jaw clenched once again and he leaned into your palm, looking into your eyes his breathing eased just a bit and his hand rested over yours.  
-I'm so sorry, i wasn't there...to be with you...- you said softly.

-You couldn't...- he stated.

You swallowed hard, he wasn't wrong, you still felt that you had neglected him though, but right now wasn't about you, it was about him.  
You stayed in this position for what felt like minutes, and you realized it had lightly started to rain outside.

-I'm here now...would you like to tell me about it?-

He inhaled a deep breath, not of exasperation, but of preparation, and nodded slowly, planting kisses over your palm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you next chapter for some smut and maybe a lil blue 👀


	8. Beautiful

Loki wasn't good at sorrowful anecdotes, because he wasn't good at feelings, but he had gotten better, you noticed.  
It was clear to you he had grown, now the Loki you knew for so long behind the scenes of his public life was starting to carefully show on the outside.  
The Loki Frigga and you knew he really was.

Guilt still left it's bitter taste at the back of your throat when he told you how he lost her, his voice stern but his eyes lost in the melancholy of the memory, as if he was reliving it again. Exhaustion also washed over both of you, between fighting and crying, your mood grew grey with the day, and the night was calm and quiet as you curled into each other to sleep, hypnotized by the sound of the heavy rain coming down the mountain.

Your eyes fluttered open, the now pouring storm outside the first thing your ears picked, you loved this type of rain, reckless and voluminous. The room was dark, the bed felt emptier, like it was about a week ago, and for a brief second you panicked, your eyes looking around the bed as if maybe you'd find him under the covers, you sat up.

-I'm here- 

Your eyes shot to the corner of the room by the further window were an armchair was placed, in a second you saw his feet retrieve from the dim light that came through the window, so fast you didn't get to see them. Maybe even too fast.

-Everything okay?- you leaned back on your palm.

-Everything's fine, go back to sleep I'll be right there.- a stern statement, almost a command.

You could barely make out the outline of his body sitting in the dark, the little light not reaching the dark corner on the other side of the room. Something was wrong, you could feel it, your legs shuffled to the edge of the bed and with a frown you cocked your head at him.

-What happened?- you said, just as sternly as he did.

-Nightmares. I'm fine. Go back to bed.- 

-Okay. Come with me.- you cocked your head at the bed.

You knew the nightmares he was talking about, but they'd usually go away quickly, they certainly never stopped him from getting back in bed with you. You heard him sigh heavily and you stood up, taking a few slow steps closer to him, getting a better look at the outline of his figure, but still too dark to make it out, the dim blue of the moonlight gliding through the tall glass windows, the rain and thunder filling the quiet room along with the growing tension emanating from Loki.

-Loki...come here.- you raised your eyebrows at him.

He said nothing but you could hear him tense up, you didn't give him a chance to reply.

-Step into the light Loki.-

Another deep sigh, and you saw him, barely saw him, stand up, your eyes following where the shape of his figure was, but your eyes trailed up higher than you were automatically used to, you squinted, thinking he couldn't really be that tall, he wasn't that tall, wasn't he?   
He took the first two steps, heavier than his stealthy ones, that caught your attention.  
Your doubts quickly dissipated as he stepped closer into the faint square of light the window had formed. He was taller, he was also...blue, his skin was blue, his eyes an intimidating shade of red that dripped all over the iris and the sclera, boring down at you. He was in his Jotun form.

Only once had you seen it before, a very long time ago when he first discovered his true heritage, his origins. Back then he looked scared, nervous, now he just looked nervous. He didn't feel comfortable in this form, he loathed it actually. You took him in, every textured mark along his cheeks and forehead, going down his naked torso and shoulders, mixing with the non birth mark scars. Even now, in this foreign form you had been educated to fear and hate during your childhood, you found him breathtaking, he was still your partner, he was still your husband, he was still Loki. You could never be afraid of him, you could never see him as a monster, no matter how convinced he was that he was one.

His eyes avoided yours when he saw you look through his real form, your hand absentmindedly raised up to cup his sharper than normal cheek, and he flinched.

-Don't. I can't control it right now...- 

You gave him a trusting look and a small smile, a silent assurance that you could control it. His mouth fell agape as your hand touched his cold skin, you focused, looking deep into his eyes, red or blue, his eyes were the same ones you fell in love with, the same ones that gazed up at the stars with you all those nights on Asgard.

-Beautiful...- you whispered.

His expression softened, his eyes shifted at the realization that even in this form, you didn't see a dreadful beast, you saw him. And he was beautiful.

His hand cupped your cheek hesitatingly, still afraid to freeze you in a matter of seconds, once he saw you had it under control, he relaxed, and a minute later you tip toed to meet his lips halfway up, kissing him as if trying to pull his fears through his lips and swallow them whole to keep him safe, you felt his nerves calm down and they did, his control was back, having enough to go back to his other self, the form of him that felt less like an illusion than his real frost giant skin. 

You wanted to ask about his nightmare, what was it about, but you could barely remember your question when his tongue deepened the kiss and his hand tangled on your hair, he took a moment to slow down, feel your lips slowly and knead them with his, and then he picked up the speed again, little by little, and you lost yourself, humming against his tongue, melting to his touch.

Stop scrolling minor, im warning ya ❌

He pressed his body to yours before his hands went down to your hips and in a swift moment he picked you up and you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist, your hands stroking and tugging at the long pitch black waves of his hair. He moved to the bed and dropped you over the mattress, a soft moan escaping your mouth at the sudden loss of his lips, not for long though, they were instantly back on yours, tongue viciously dancing with yours as his hands gripped on your thighs and he slithered in between them.

When his lips went down your collarbones he lifted your sleeping sweater and slid it off, not wasting any time to plant wet long kisses down your sternum, he spoke against your skin.

-Say it again-

Your eyes fixated on him as he reached your eager nipple.

-Beautiful...- you breathed out.

A low hum left his mouth and he wrapped it around the awaiting nub, earning a gasp from you, your eyes shut as his tongue swirled over it.

-Again.- he mumbled against the skin.

-You're beautiful...- this time it took you longer to produce the words, already dripping wet at the teasing contact to your breast. His hand coming up to massage on the other one.

-Hmm, i love how good you are to me- his already groggy voice echoed through your ears and you smiled when it send another tingle down your core.

-And i love how bad you are to me- you moaned seductively.

You heard him growl, low, long and malicious, but full of pleasure, his mouth left your now swollen breast and his hands followed him to your waist, gripping on the sides. You felt his lips, the tip of his long nose, and then his teeth, he bit hard into your stomach sending delicious pain and earning a whimper from your mouth, your back arched and he bucked his hips down to you, letting you feel how hard he already was.  
He kept leaving softer bites down to the hem of your shorts and he hummed against your skin, his hands now caressing up and down your inner thighs, his mouth not going any further.

Your feet rested on his lower back, looking down to see if you could reach the hem you found his eyes looking up at you, pupils expanded and lips pink, scarred shoulders flexed around your thighs, it was a sight to say the least.

At this point the rain outside had nothing on the pooling heat underneath your panties, you bit your lip, hooked your thumbs to the hem of his pants and slid them down along with his underwear, hinting at him what you wanted.  
He chuckled against your lower belly.

-You'll have to use your words if you want something darling...- he kissed under your belly button.

You were about to speak when his teeth sunk again on your inner thigh, you choked out a gasp as he tightly gripped on your hips, keeping them in place.

-What do you want darling?- he spoke slowly, now against the fabric just over your sex.

You let out a needy moan.  
-I want your tongue- you managed to speak.

Another chuckle.  
-Where?-

-Hm, on my pussy...please- you whispered.

His fingers pulled down shorts and panties all together and before you could notice it his mouth was eating you out.  
Your hips arched up and your eyes rolled back, your hands finding his hair and yanking in pleasure, his lips sucked on your folds and his tongue slid up and down between them, pressing at your entrance.

-Oh my godss- your mouth fell open and you swayed your hips up and down, joining the rhythm of his tongue.

-Look at me-

It felt so good, the efforts you'd done on battles before were small compared to how hard it was to divert your eyes from the back of your skull, with every sway of your hips his nose rubbed on your clit sending shots of delicious pleasure up your gut. 

-I will take my tongue out of your pussy and leave you without coming. Look. At. Me.- he snarled.

With a desperate whine you finally opened your eyes to find his gaze, seeing his tongue stroking on your cunt made it better but harder to keep your eyes open.  
He growled against your clit and your eyes shut, a string of moans came out your lips before you caught yourself and looked at him again, feeling your orgasm climbing in, but being utterly out of words to let him know.

-I...i, oh fuuck me...Loki- you blabbered out half of what you meant to say.

You felt his tongue leave your clit and push into your entrance, you gasped loudly, arching your back high in the air, he was fucking you with his tongue, and you were close, so close, your sight was hazy from how hard your eyelids shut. But you didn't want to cum from his tongue, you wanted him, inside you. Now. And you managed to get the words out.

-Loki...aaah, wait...- you moaned and panted.

-Yes darling?- he said looking up at you.

-I need you, fuck i need you inside me!- you blurted before you could lose the ability to say it.

He pulled away, your thighs instantly falling open as you waited for his cock, you watched him pull you closer and push the head slowly inside you as he looked down admiring you.

-You look so perfect like this my dear, squirming for me under the moonlight...-

His cock stroked in and out of you, desperately slow, never fully going in, his hand was placed on your lower belly and your legs hugged his thighs, you bit your lip hard, moaning and whining, desperate for him to fill you up.

-Do you want me inside you beautiful?-

You managed to shoot him a nod and a defying look, his hand came up to grip at your throat, his fingers pressing hard enough that your mouth opened slightly and you choked a whimper.  
He looked down at you, he wanted to push in you as well, a strand of hair hanging from his forehead, his broad torso coated in a thin layer of sweat, his hand tugged at your windpipe and he lifted you slightly.

-Answer me. Do you want me to fuck your wet cunt??- he raised his voice.

You bit your lip and your mouth curled in a smile, knowing your next sentence will make him go mad, your clit already tingling at what was coming.

-Yes, your highness, i want you to fuck me hard- the words rolled out seductively as you offered him your best pout.

His breath hitched, he grabbed one of your calves positioning your leg over his shoulder and in the blink of an eye he thrusted inside you, the angle of the position letting him dive so deep in you you could feel his length on your cervix. Shallow short breaths and moans rolled from the back of your throat, followed by desperate praises that sounded like pleas. You briefly adverted your gaze up at him, his mouth hung low as he emitted choked guttural moans, his eyes shut in sheer bliss and his brows wrinkled in a frown, trying to hold it together.

Loki's POV:

He had been wanting this since he saw the look in her face when Strange told her she wasn't a threat. The same glare she shot him just seconds ago, it made him go mad.

He had forgotten how strong she was at battle, how well she managed herself at putting someone in their place, he couldn't help a smirk and a shaken breath when she dissipated Strange's magic by her side, so powerful. And he was the one she had chosen. He was the one who got to be with her.

So powerful, she could control the harm his jotun form could cause her, he was trying hard to control it too, but the nightmares, they had been too strong tonight, the anxiety on his body too much to focus.

Right now, the ardour of his desire for her was too much to focus, her pretty pink mouth open agape under his hold on her little throat, her eyes trying so incredibly hard to stay on him, pants and high moans escaping her every time his cock thrusted deep inside her, stretching her out, filling every bit of her, and her hair spread out against the mattress, the pendant moving lightly between her bouncing breasts contrasting with the red that stained her chest from pleasure.  
The sight alone could make him cum right there, her tight cunt gripping him so good he got closer by the second, and he could feel she was close as well.

-Ooh fuck yes, yes that's the spot...right there yes Loki!- she gasped and screamed and her back arched up at him. Her small hand gripped the forearm around her throat.

That last statement sent him over the edge, his thrusts became sloppy quickly, the sounds of the storm outside instantly muffled by his skin slapping against hers and the nonsense they both blurted out in whimpers and screams.

-Ahh fuck! Siggy...- he hissed, feeling the hot white pleasure fog up his senses as they both became undone, the long ropes of cum filling her belly in his last rough thrusts.

His grip on her throat loosened up, stroking it with his thumb affectionately, his head fell back as his chest rose in slow pants, and the wave of laughter hit him once again, wheezing but low and strong, a habit he always had, and he knew Sigyn loved.

As the chuckled ceased he leaned over her, still stroking lazy lines on her neck, he kissed her soft, familiar lips, they welcomed his as always. Their breaths still slightly agitated, he carefully let himself fall onto her, pulling his cock out of the warmth of her walls. She stroked his biceps, humming in satisfaction against his mouth.

-That's a name I haven't heard in a while...- she spoke between kisses.

-What?- Loki mumbled.

-Siggy- 

He barely recognized he said it after all this time, one of his nicknames for her, not frequently used but still special.

-Hhmm...Siggy, my gorgeous girl...- he growled faintly.

-You think you'll be able to sleep now?- she half teased and half asked.

-Definitely-

-And will you tell me what the nightmare was about?-

-...In the morning.-

-Alright-

The noise of the never ending storm outside and the dripping rain engulfed the room once again, they wrapped themselves under the covers, resting against each other, pain and nightmares being comforted by her soft skin under his arms, and Loki fell into a peaceful sleep.


	9. Of Tricks And Talks

A familiar scent invaded your senses, clean sheets, mixed with the musky scent from your lover; when you started to wake up you felt the warm skin rising and falling behind you and slow deep breaths muffled under your hair. Your eyes opened to find the dull light of the morning bouncing off the dresser against the wall, the mess of sheets around you and hugging your waist a strong possessive arm, resting his hand right next to it, you lazily placed your arm over it and gently stroked his forearm going down to interlace your fingers with his, the shape and size difference making you smirk.

You could tell Loki wasn't usually a hand to hand combat guy...or God, by his hands, they had always been soft, not baby soft but more like a piece of velvet, and yours would usually be more calloused, a few of your fingers slightly rougher at the use of knives and sword.  
Since your exile though, the roles seem to have switched, without battle or much training being done, your hands felt softer and even more hydrated, his now felt like a worn out piece of velvet that had been through a few rounds, even so, they never lost their elegant physiognomy. 

You didn't realize you were feeling and tracing his fingers until you felt his hand turn upside down and interlace with yours, the deep breaths on your hair now coming down to the back of your neck, and you smiled.

-Did i wake you up?-

-No...-

-Hmm-

You merely hummed in response, feeling still heavy with sleep, your eyelids merely open taking in his hold around you, his tall legs brushing against yours, his broad shoulders engulfing you, and a morning wood.  
A small grin formed on your lips, and just then you felt the tip of his nose caressing slowly down your neck to your shoulder, and he left small gentle kisses over your skin, every kiss lighting up bigger sparks on your flesh with the knowledge that he'd need to get rid of his erection somehow.

With this knowledge you giggled maliciously low and shifted your body, turning to face him, finding sleepy eyelids but bright baby blue eyes, full of arousal. Your lips made a path along his jaw as your hand went under the covers down his torso, feeling the small amount of chest hair and down to the toned abs, soon enough you felt the tip of his cock pointing upwards, hard and big, longing to be touched, your mouth moved under his earlobe as your hand slowly stroke it and you could feel his hand squeeze at your waist.

-Hmm, good morning your highness- you whispered.

He breathed harder against your shoulders, you could feel a groan forming on his throat at the nickname. He leaned into you and planted wet deep kisses on your shoulder, neck and collarbone as you stroked his cock slowly, his breaths slowly picking up an erratic pace. You shifted your wrist so that you could tease the precum coated tip with your thumb, earning a moan and a hitched breath from him, his hand snaked down to your ass gripping tight, his fingers digging on your skin still under the sheets.

And then you heard footsteps.

You both pulled away at the same time, looking at each other and then at the bedroom door alerted and ready, the door was open and you both waited to see if the footsteps came back, your hand left Loki's still hard dick and got ready to manifest and throw a knife and so did he.  
As soon as you saw the shadow on the floor your dagger and his appeared in your hands and in the next second you both threw them at the big figure at the door, who ducked and missed your blades by inches, he shot back up to look behind him and then at you.

It was Thor.

One time when you and Loki still had a relationship in Asgard, you both scurried away from some royal guards into the woods, he took your arm and plastered your body against his in a tall mold covered rock. When he felt the guards getting closer and closer to you both his whole body tensed up in fear.

But it was nothing compared to how tensed up he was now, in bed, with a woman, naked, and erected. And his brother just walked in on him.

Although it was just a few short seconds, Thor stood by the door frame, his eyes wide as an Asgardian beer barrel and his face red, standing so still he could be a statue. You were willing to bet he wished he were a statue right now.   
Your hand plastered around your mouth in hopes that you wouldn't burst out in laughter and you hid your face on Loki's neck. 

-THOR! GET OUT!- you heard Loki's scream, still raspy from waking up.

-Sorry, sorry so sorry!- came Thor's voice, you heard him turn away and close the door behind him. Thank Gods.

Looking down briefly you saw Loki's erection was very much gone. The God of Mischief just got cockblocked by his older brother.

That last thought was enough for you not being able to stifle your laughter any longer, your shoulders shook and a wheeze left your throat as you cackled onto Loki's shoulder, you pulled away to see his pale face red like you had never seen it and this only made your smile grow bigger and your laughter louder, small tears brimming on your eyes.

-It's not funny.-

-I'm sorry, I'm sorry!- you snorted, throwing your head back as the scene played back in your head.

Seeing that you couldn't stop laughing you cupped his face and kissed his cheek, then left a few pecks along his lips before you started giggling again.  
He let out a very angry sight.

-I think we should get dressed- you patted his chest.

He threw the sheets off both of you and sat up to get off the bed, you mimicked his actions, still smiling to yourself at how frustrated he was as he got ready, running his hands through his hair in an exasperated manner.  
Once you were both ready he made his way to the door, and you grabbed his wrist, there was no way he was speaking to his brother while he was this shaken up. You grabbed his jaw with both of your hands and gifted him a deep, slow kiss, you whispered as you pulled away to look at him.

-This isn't finished.- 

-Oh believe me, it isn't.- he smirked and opened the door.

You walked to the kitchen where you found a still rather embarrassed Thor rubbing his hand down his chin, as soon as Loki and him saw each other you could feel the tension lingering, their gazes trying hilariously hard not to meet. Instead he turned to you.

-The door was unlocked and, my apologies...- he said.

Again you held back a chuckle and gave him a smile as you waved a dismissive hand his way.

-No worries, when did you arrive?- you instantly offered a change of subject.

-Last night, it was rather late so I thought I'd come this morning...i am really regretting that decision right now...- he mumbled that last part, you thought of last night and cocked a brow.

If he had come last night, well he wouldn't have gotten to the door before he heard you screaming his brother's name, and if he had come today, about 10 minutes later, he would've found your mouth wrapped around his brother's cock.

-I think you came in just at the right time- you raised your brows letting him know what you meant. 

You instantly heard Loki take a sharp breath and saw him tighten his hands into fists, he spoke loud and clear.

-I believe we need to talk.- he said.

It worked.

Of course you heard Thor coming, in fact you felt him through your cunning, a tug of incoming news in a familiar shape.  
Truth is you had gotten so entangled on your reunion with Loki (quite literally) that you hadn't had much time to convince him of talking with his brother, although you also felt he was considering it. But he would still play hard to get as soon as his brother came ready for answers, so you took the chance as soon as you saw it.

Through your powers you muffled Thor's call at the door, and when he stepped in and walked through the living room you softened his steps successfully stopping Loki from hearing them, you knew if the moment was awkward enough he'd want to divert it to anything but that.  
Besides...it was so much fun.

Now Loki and Thor were walking to the backyard, in hopes to get privacy and some fresh air given the moment they just shared.  
Loki stopped at the back porch, taking another deep breath, his jaw tense.

Loki's POV:

Embarrassment quickly got replaced with anxious anticipation, he had no choice but to tell his brother, he'd try to trim the story here and there, nothing too private, he had seen enough of that a moment ago.  
He felt a hand on his back and turned to look at her, a reassuring smile on her face.

-He couldn't have chosen any other moment to come.- Loki sighed, looking forward.

-Hey-

His eyes fell back on her.  
-It's gonna be okay, I'm here- she smiled- he loves you, he deserves to know...-

Loki knew she was right, she was always right, he gave her a slight nod and she turned to head back to the house.

-Don't worry, he didn't see anything, i made sure of it as soon as he opened the front door-

Loki frowned, confused as to what she meant, had she heard him coming in? He turned her way with a surprised expression as she opened the door to go in.

-You tricked me?- he connected the dots.

-Sorry darling I can't hear you- she said walking in- go talk to your brother!- he heard her say as she went into the living room.

Loki took a moment, today wasn't his day at all and it was starting to bug him, The Trickster God....tricked.   
He shook the thought away.He'll have to get back to it later.

-I'm sure you have questions...- he said to his brother.

He felt him side eyeing him.  
-...I have a few-

Loki clasped his hands in front of him, thinking of where to start, how terrible could it possibly get after what just happened? Maybe he'd let Thor ask the questions, test the waters.

-Ask then...-

-Do you love her?-

All father give me patience for if you give me strength I'll kill myself right here.

-Alright no more questions...- Loki said, and took a pause in preparation- Sygin is from Asgard, I've known her since we were teenagers, back when we were starting to learn battle skills. I kept her...us a secret to keep her safe. Even though she doesn't need it, she's under my protection."

-Keep her safe from who?-

-Thanos.- Loki replied, quickly.

-And before Thanos?-

Loki stopped to consider his answer and the way he could phrase it as to not give a full explanation of how for so long Sygin loathed the royal family, and didn't even know Loki was part of it.

-...Odin.- he said.

There was a pause when their father's name came up, he could tell Thor's mind was wondering, lingering on his answer, his arms crossed over his chest, and he nodded.

-Perhaps you were right to do so...-

Loki turned to look at him, slightly surprised at Thor agreeing with him, that was the second time he had done that in a month or so, Loki was starting to get suspicious.

-How so?-

-Father didn't approve of Jane, i have a feeling maybe he would've liked Sygin better, even if she wasn't of high class or a Goddess- he chuckled the last part.

Loki's brow twitched.  
-She is a Goddess Thor, and thank heavens she didn't hear you say that.-

Now Thor turned around.  
-She's a Goddess?-

-Goddess of Fidelity.-

Another pause, Thor went back to his previous stance, Loki could almost hear the wheels turning in his head as he tried to connect dots, but Loki had barely given him any. He really didn't know where to take it from there without revealing anything too private, Sygin was right yet again, he had to tell him the truth, at least for this bit of the story. Another sharp breath went in through his nose as he gathered the courage to open up, even the thought made him cringe, he was willing to rebuild a relationship with his brother, but he never thought so much had to be said in such short time.

-Have you told her of all your...adventures?- he said before Loki could speak.

-"Adventures". What a nice way to put it. Yes, she knows everything, that's why she's here. She wasn't involved.-

Thor turned to him, body and all, and so did he, expecting more questions, expecting more invasion, his brother looked at him, his fake and real eye scanning his face, presumably looking for traces of lies or tricks, and next his expression softened a bit, similar to that he gave him back on the ship, right before they hugged for the first time in what felt like forever.

-Can she help us fight Thanos?-

Loki cocked a brow and nodded to himself.  
-I'm sure she'll be happy to-

Thor nodded back and looked at the house, then back to him.  
-If she's under your protection, then she's under mine as well.-

Loki couldn't help the small smirk that tugged on his mouth, he could tell Thor had more questions, but what he showed, is that he could give him time, and that all that mattered, what his younger brother told him, if someone was important to one of them then it was important to both, suddenly he felt relaxed that he didn't get into an argument over not wanting to tell the story further, and he was glad Sygin had cockblocked him into speaking with him. She was still getting punished later, but she was right.

For an Odison's family talk, that had gone rather well.  
And his brother smiled back at him.

He understood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to mention the hug because we deserved to see it.  
> I hope i accurately portrayed a space siblings talk he he


	10. Maybe It’s Better This Way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: mentions of suicidal thoughts

Loki's POV:

Walking back to the house with his brother, he thought back to their previous talk, back on Sakaar in the elevator, Loki had tried his best to seem unfazed and uninterested, but crumbled inside when Thor told him how he thought the world of him, and he was genuine. Loki knew a lie when he heard one and that wasn't the case, but he could also hear the past tense on his brother's feeling, see how disappointed his eyes were on him when he said it.

Loki stared at the house ahead, when really, he was staring at her, thinking:  
What would she do?

-Do you think...-Loki started, the vulnerability of the question making his stomach churn.

\- Do you think you could ever think...highly of me again?-

Loki couldn't bring himself to say "the world of me", no, he didn't think he could redeem himself to that point, wipe out that much red, as he had put it the last time he came to Midgard. He wouldn't ask his brother for the impossible.  
He heard him chuckle under his breath and look at him as they approached the back entrance of the cabin.

-Brother, if you give me the chance, I'll be happy to...-

Loki nodded to himself and Thor patted his back then placed his hand on his neck, just like old times.

Fair enough... Loki thought.

-Now give us a kiss- Thor teased.

He shook his head and huffed at his brother's mockery, but couldn't help a small smile at the memories it brought, when life was slightly happier and their relationship was slightly more open. Now here they were, and things would never be the same, but they could be similar.

-....She's my wife- Loki mumbled before he regretted wanting to say it.

Thor's eyes widened.  
-You're married?!-

-Gods above.- Loki sighed- Not properly married, we never had a ceremony, it was...rushed, let's leave it at that.-

Loki entered back in the house with Thor behind him, the smell of a hot meal on the stove invading their senses, on his left Sygin stood in front of the kitchen counter, wiping her hands she smiled up at them.

Your POV: 

-Indeed it was rushed- you wrapped your arms around Loki's waist remembering the night you married him- But it was beautiful...-

He smiled down at you and you pecked his lips, you knew he was never entirely happy with your secretive small wedding, but at the time and all things considered, it was perfect, you weren't looking for a high class wedding at the palace anyways if it meant the All Father would be there to judge you both. Being soul bonded to someone was much more than marriage anyways, and as soon as Loki became king after Odin fell into the unexpected Odin's sleep, Loki took his chance to do many things, like a teenager being able to misbehave while his parents were out. Amongst these things, he married you, again, very much a last minute informal thing to confirm your status under the law of Asgard, since soul bonds weren't recognized.  
Loki thought he would rule for longer than he actually did, and even though you did not accept the title of Queen of Asgard, you were willing to stand besides him.  
Then things got complicated...

-Did you get the answers you were hoping for?-

-Knowing my brother I'd say i got more than that- he gave you a small bow with his head, you watched in surprise- Sygin, Goddess of Fidelity, it's a true pleasure to meet you, i believe I'm your brother in law.-

Your eyes widened at his demeanor, although you didn't mind it at all, and you offered him a smile.

Your mother, before she died, would teach proper table manners to you, she always said "If one day you have dinner with the royal family you will thank me!" and you had always thought it to be ridiculous. And here you were now, sitting at the table, with the Princes, having lunch.

-Please tell me you don't also have kids hiding somewhere brother-

Thor was obviously joking but as soon as he said it Loki choked and if you had a bite in your mouth you would too. He cleared his throat and you fixated your eyes on the food in front of you which suddenly required your full attention. You heard Thor laugh, and you felt like those comments were just getting started.

-There's a matter in question we need to speak of...Thanos. He is dangerous but without all the stones he can't achieve his purpose, it'll be a hard battle but we can win.- he nodded.

-Yes but to defeat him before he collects the six stones we have to get to him.-

-Well lucky for us he won't be collecting all the stones, the Tesseract was destroyed with Asgard-

-Even without it he is still much more powerful than your group of mortals brother...- Loki looked at him.

-Maybe, but he won't get as far, we'll fight him. We can win.- Thor nodded confidently.

-And how do we fit in this?- you asked.

-Well you know Thanos, apparently, so we could use your help, your knowledge on him, anything you can give us while we prepare for battle-

-And do you think your Avengers are ready to trust my word?- Loki said, a smirk tugging at his lips.

-Probably not but they trust me- he and Loki shared another teasing grin.- But first we need to give the people of Asgard a new home, they need to rebuild, they need to feel safe.-

-Tønsberg isn't far from here, it's not golden or sunny all week but it may just work, isolated enough for them to start fresh, no one will bother them there...-

While Thor and you discussed the way to settle the Asgardian refugees in their soon to be home, you couldn't help but feel something didn't sit right, Loki had gone abnormally quiet, even slightly tense, on your peripheral you saw his eye twitch and your suspicions grew bigger. As soon as Thor decided it was time to leave you decided it was time for an interrogatory.

-I'll be returning soon with Brunnhilde, Heimdall and the people to help settle them, i trust we can count on your help-

-Of course, we'll be happy to help- you raised your brows at Loki who sighed.

-Thank you, once again- he smiled at you both and went his way, you didn't stop to see where, you closed the door and lurked back to the kitchen where Loki was headed.

-Who's Brunnhilde?-

-The Valkyrie-

-Oh...and what are you hiding?-

He turned to you, but didn't say a word, once again, you were right. He had something under his sleeve you knew it, and you were praying to all gods including yourself that it wouldn't be trouble, but you knew who your husband was, and you took a deep breath.

-Loki what did you do?-

-I wasn't hiding it from you.-

-That's not what i asked.-

His jaw tensed up and his head hung low, defeated. His hand lifted and a green glow appeared as he manifested the blue glowing cube in his hand, the Tesseract.  
Your shoulders fell and you threw your head back, letting out an exhausted sigh, of course out of everything he could've been hiding his first pick was the possible doom of both of you.

-Loki...- you huffed, his hand fell and the Tesseract was once again hidden.

You rubbed your temples, already feeling a headache forming at how much your brain was screaming at him and how hard your jaw was clenching, your fingers rubbed over your eyes down over your mouth and pressed there, Loki stepped closer, if looks could kill he'd be dead on your feet right now, your anger somehow intensifying when you saw the pouty look on his eyes as though he was playing the victim. Although under your anger who wouldn't feel like a victim?

-I had a reason...- he started, slowly.

-Really?- you stated- Okay. Go ahead. Enlighten me.- 

-I thought it could serve us as an advantage...We're more powerful with it- 

-And didn't you think maybe letting it get destroyed would be a better advantage against someone who is hunting us for it???- 

-I took a rushed decision, the clock was ticking and it called me, I thought there'd be a reason, maybe with it and Strange's stone we have more of an advantage, he has stones but now so do we.-

You scoffed at him. Sometimes his mind fascinated you in even the smallest details but sometimes you just could not understand his line of thought for the life of you.

-You're mad...-

-You think?? Of course I'm mad Loki! Your brother is convinced Thanos can't win because one of the stones is gone but it isn't gone at all it's IN YOUR POCKET!!-

Now you were pacing around the room, you couldn't even look at him through your anger, you wanted to punch his sculpture looking like face right on his sharp cheekbone.

-You need to tell him!-

-You need to trust me.-

The sound that left your throat was meant to be a grunt but ended sounding like an enraged growl. Of course Thanos attacked their ship, Loki could've died, it wasn't only sheer revenge and resentment, he knew the stone was on that ship, and now he was hunting you with a double purpose. You were mad yes, but you were also worried, frightened, disappointed, anxious, it was a cocktail of emotions getting the best of you, you couldn't even think straight, you couldn't help but feel that Loki really hadn't considered you when he took the cube, the one thing you both had been avoiding for so long, the reason you agreed to be apart from the love of your life, your soul companion, without knowing whether you'd see him once again or die awaiting for him, and now he was going to find you, you knew it, because if one reason for Thanos to kill you both wasn't enough, now he had two. 

-Trust you. Yeah...i...ugh...- you huffed.

Tears started welling up in the corner of your eyes at the near future, 15 short minutes ago you had the hope that Thor's new version of The Warriors Three stood a chance against the Titan, and now you felt...you didn't even know how you felt, betrayed? Yes. That was probably the best way to put it, even if you hated that you felt that towards Loki. You couldn't be with him right now, it was too much.

-You better make sure your brother knows about this.-

-Sygin...- he tried stepping closer to you and you held up a finger.

-No.-

You stormed out before the tears in your eyes collapsed, Loki didn't follow or call for you, he knew you enough to know when to leave you alone, he could probably tell you couldn't even look at him. You made your way down the mountain, your breathing harsh and your steps heavy but fast with irritation. You walked so far you got to town and kept going until you reached the rocky cliffs by the sea. And if you could've you would have kept walking, but now your sadness had taken over your anger, a chill ran down through your spine as if your body physically felt the change and your knees buckled, your eyes filled once again with heavy tears blurring your vision quickly, your lips curled at the overwhelming feelings and you let out gasping sobs as you sat down on the grass. And you started wishing, wishing you and Loki could just catch a break, wishing things would've gone different, wishing you could go back to a happier time, wishing even that you both would just be simple Asgardians who just fell in love, wishing your dad could hug you, wishing your mum could give you advise.  
When did life even get so complicated?

Every time you asked that question, it was merely something almost out of politeness to yourself, you knew exactly when it had gotten complicated. 

You grazed your fingers over the golden pendant resting on your chest. This was your life. And maybe this was all there was to it, complications, worry, hiding, fighting, fear. Trouble.  
You didn't even want to keep kneading this thoughts around your mind, the headache from your crying already pounding on your temples and your eyes puffy and irritated from your tears, you made your way back to the house at sunset and arrived at night, the cold being a slight relief to your hot head and cheeks.

As you opened the door you were greeted with darkness and silence, you barely noticed, exhaustion heavy on your shoulders as you dragged your feet to the bedroom, you didn't care where Loki was, you couldn't deal with talking to him, you needed space, and rest.  
The bathroom door was closed and there was light coming from under it, you glanced at it and made your way to the bed, taking only your shoes off, crawling under the heavy covers, hoping they'd provide some comfort and that maybe you'd sink into them forever. The feeling all too familiar to you.

The last few small tears came from your eyes, you heard the door open and the light turn off, three steps were heard before they stopped, you were facing away from him but you knew Loki was standing there, his eyes on you, he sighed slowly and you heard him come closer, you closed your eyes, not wanting to talk, but when you felt the covers lift and the mattress shifting you hoped he'd come closer, just so you could feel his warmth.

But he didn't, maybe it was for the best, you didn't exactly feel like anything right now, you felt numb, your heart and mind completely blocked off pushing away the proximity of danger to the back of your mind, hoping maybe that would make them disappear.

Your eyes grew heavy and you gave in to the comfort of sleep, right before you dozed off you heard Loki mumble something you couldn't make out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I once read somewhere that as a couple you should never go to bed with unresolved arguments, so yeah, that's why i did it lol


	11. Blueberry Pie

Your eyes opened slowly, stopping halfway as you adjusted to the blurriness and how heavy they felt. The tip of your nose felt cold, you didn't mind, cold weather gave you a better excuse to stay entangled under the covers all day. You rolled over as you remembered last night, expecting to find Loki, but he wasn't there.

You looked at the empty pillow and sighed, you didn't want to be entangled in bed if it wasn't with him, your face nuzzled into the pillow for a bit before you decided it just wasn't the same, and you stood up and wrapped yourself in the cover, making your way to the kitchen. When you got there, it was also empty, as well as the living room, and lastly after checking the bathroom, you realized Loki was nowhere to be found. You couldn't help but feel slightly confused and a tad worried, was he okay? Had you make him feel bad? Sad? Guilty? 

Well he is guilty...

Once again you peeked into the kitchen, now too awake to head back to bed, and also confused as to where Loki could've gone. You found the answer to your questions on a small note on the small table that you didn't notice before.

***

Gone out, thought you might want some time alone, be back soon.

Loki

***

You had forgotten what his handwriting looked like, elegant but effortless, the ink staining over the paper so swiftly there was barely any trace of the pressure of the pen on the paper. You always wondered if his handwriting was a result of his royal upbringing or his sorcery upbringing, after all, a magic users' hand must move so lightly and carelessly that the patterns their fingers traced should be almost hipnotizing. Magic needed delicacy.

A low grumbling from your upper belly interrupted your thoughts, last night you were too drained to realize you hadn't had dinner, and you were starving, in fact, your sweet tooth was craving blueberry pie.

Your husband pissed you off, you deserve a blueberry pie.

You slid off the clothes from last night, and threw on some more cozy ones, sliding in your boots and walking out the back door to the forest, basket in hand, inhaling the fresh cold morning air. 

A little more than 2 years ago, you felt Loki die through your soul bond, the agony and impotence that trembled your bones crashed you, you cried and sobbed for hours on end until his heartbeat came back, and you could breathe again, after that, you were so annoyed that you walked over to town, went into the bakery and asked for the first thing you saw, a golden, crispy looking blueberry pie, you didn't even know what blueberries were but you needed it. The pie was gone in an hour and with it, your irritation at Loki's unpredictable tactics.

Soon enough you found that blueberries grew in the forest, and you decided from now on, if Loki pulled another one of his risky moves, you would treat yourself to a whole blueberry pie. 

Lucky for you there were still enough for the pie in one of the trees, as you selected them you took in the surrounding forest, in not much time it'll be covered in snow and you were looking forward to it, snow wasn't a thing on Asgard, so when you came here it took you by surprise, how cold the weather could get, and yet how beautiful could a thick coat of plain white be.

You heard rustling behind you and you snapped your head back, you were met by the orange fur of a fox that you instantly recognized, and you crouched down.

-Heey...it's you again, hello-

She lowered her head looking at you, her ears perked up and she trotted your way, rubbing her body against your hand, causing a smile to form on your lips. You sat down on the cold grass, she started sniffing your fingers and her eyes found the glitz of your necklace, catching her attention.

-It's rather shiny isn't it? Loki made it for me, the one i made for him isn't as glamorous-

She lifted herself placing her paws on your knee and leaned forward, sniffing the pendant closely, her mouth opened to try and bite it and you stopped her.

-I'm sorry but i can't give this to you, doesn't matter how angry i am at him- you laughed softly, your hands scratching behind her ears- Well i'm not angry at him, not really...it's just, he makes this impulsive decisions, maybe he really means well but...we've been trying to avoid Thanos for so long, i can't help but feel anxious, do you eat blueberries?-

You grabbed a couple from the basket and extended your hand to her, she hesitated but took them eagerly, licking your hand after.

-Huh, apparently you do...- you fed her a few more and petted her head, she looked up at you, her eyes fiery with life- Besides, it's been so long since we've had a disagreement like that, it wasn't a fight, Gods it wasn't even half a fight, but it still felt...bittersweet.-

The fox sniffed the basket full of blueberries as you spoke, she stole a few more and you ran your hand along her elegant tail, another grumble on your stomach reminded you how hungry you were and you stood up, she looked up at you with a puzzled look.

-I have to leave my friend, but it was lovely to see you again- 

You turned to leave and she followed behind you, casually crossing in front of you or stopping to smell a tree or two, you smiled to yourself, when you reached the clear leading to the house she stopped, you looked back at her, realizing she wouldn't follow you further.

-Don't worry, you don't have to come with me, i'm not alone anymore...-

She sat down, her tail curled around her legs and her whiskers twitched.

-Would you like a name?-

Her ears perked up.

-How about...Narvi? It's used for boys usually, but i like it for you- you smiled down at her- I'm Sygin- you placed your hand over your chest, she moved her head down slightly, then turned back to the forest, as she took her first steps to leave she glanced back at you.

-Goodbye Narvi- you laughed, and she trotted away.

Just like you thought the pie left you more than satisfied, it was juicy and sweet and warm, amazing, you didn't finish it all like you had last time, but it was still 3/4 of a pie. Loki still wasn't back, and you started wondering what he could possibly be doing as you held his note in your hands.

"Thought you might want some time alone"

The sentence seemingly told you what you needed to know, he felt bad, and he also needed his time alone.  
For the remainder of the day you didn't do much, mostly thought, now rested and with a full stomach it was easier to recognize that the overwhelming anxiety of the past had taken a toll on you yesterday, Loki was the smartest person you knew, he was good at last minute decisions, but that didn't make him perfect, you still thought it was a terrible idea, you were still afraid his attempt at an advantage was just waiting to explode on your faces.

When the cold grew harsher you livened up the fire in the chimney and drew yourself a bath with water hot like Surtur's skin. You were glad that bastard was dead, he was always a useless pain on the side.

Your hair was up in a lazy bun and your body under the water up to your shoulders when you heard the front door open, his steps heavier than usual, there was a knock on the bathroom door.

-Come in...-

The door swung open and your eyes found his, he was in a long black coat, a scarf draped around his neck, his hands were in his pockets and his hair, like yours, was tied on a messy bun.  
His gaze held yours for a moment before he walked in, taking his coat and scarf off, he kneeled besides the tub opposite from you, his forearm sat against the edge. His eyes looked bright under these lights, the shorter strands of his hair falling along the sides, his lips in a straight line, his shoulders always broad and his face always confident, the start of a smirk on his mouth as he eyed you back. How did he manage to look even more attractive when you were mad at him? 

-What?- you finally spoke softly.

He parted his lips to speak and hesitated for a moment.  
-Every time i see you, i think you've bloomed like a flower...yet whenever i see you again you've somehow gotten more beautiful than before.-

His voice sounded just gruff enough that it was barely noticeable, and as he said that he made you swim in the blue pool that were his eyes.

Appealing snake of a man...

You let out a fun huff and a closed smile as you slowly shook your head, a light flush creeped up your cheeks, as if that were the first compliment he ever gave you. You stayed in comfortable silence a while more, still staring at each other the way one stares at an oil on canvas, or a raging fire.

-Where did you go?- 

-I thought I'd take a look at that town you speak of...-

You nodded.  
-And?-

-And it's...nice, humble and quiet. What did you do today?-

-I baked a pie-

-A pie?- he raised his brows, almost wanting to confirm if he heard you right.

-A blueberry pie- 

His brows pinched together and you smiled.  
-Blueberries are a fruit-

-Ah...are they good?-

Not half as good as you look right now.  
-They're really good...-

He hummed in response and once again you fell in silence, the water from the tub was getting lukewarm now and your fingers were starting to wrinkle. Loki didn't say anything else, you knew he wouldn't bring it up, even if he wanted to, which you know deep down he didn't. So you did.

-I won't tell your brother, you know I'm not a snitch- 

-But you'll try and convince me to do it myself.- he said, a little too fast.

-Of course, because you should.-

-You're still going on about that?- he squinted as if you were being unreasonable.

-Yes. Yes i am!- you were getting irritated again.

-Well you're thinking about it too much, i assure you he'll know when the time is right.-

You snapped.  
-What when Thanos has his hand around your throat and you have no other choice but to surrender it to him?! Is that the time??!-

You looked at him with a tearful glare.  
Now you were irritated, he had made huge progress yesterday with his brother so why is it that now he was just leaving him out, did you have to force an awkward encounter between them every time you wanted them to talk? And why did you have to do it? You wouldn't if the situation were different, but this wasn't just about a secret wife, this was about war.  
You pulled your gaze away from him and bit your cheek in annoyance, you didn't mean to imply death, but you couldn't help it.

-I'm sorry...- Loki whispered, you could feel his eyes still on you- But these Avengers Thor talks about, they've been after the Tesseract as well, they're obsessed with it, if they see me with it they might get too excited, too confident, you know how Midgardians can be...-

Now that was a better explanation, what could've possibly delayed that until now? Of course you knew how humans could be, they're cocky and stubborn, they don't think before they fire and they worry about the wrong things.

-It's okay...- you sighed- Why didn't you say that yesterday?- you tilted your head at him.

Taking a second to look at his ensemble you noticed he was wearing a grey button up with the sleeves rolled up, some black jeans and a belt, you were a naked Goddess in a tub and he still looked sexier than you. Then he smirked.

Fucking Hel...

-You stormed out...- he said cockily, a part of you knew he thought he could win this.

You took another look at the belt around his hips and the smirk on his face, and as a tingle ran down your belly, you got an idea. He thought he could irritate you and be a smart ass about it? He wanted to play, fine, you'll play.

You sat straight and leaned closer to him, making sure your breasts were very much out of the water for him to see, and you squinted at him.  
-Really? Because that was my fault?-

-Just answering your question darling...- he squinted back at you, his smirk turning into a grin.

-And you are getting too comfortable darling, you don't have the upper hand here.- you furrowed your brows.

-Really?- he glanced down at your dripping figure- I'm not the one with the hard nipples-

You didn't give his grin a chance to get bigger, your hand collided with his cheeks in a head turning slap, not hard enough to hurt him, but hard enough to turn him on.

-Feeling funny are we?- 

His breath grew harsher as he looked at you, pupils now dilated and with a hint of surprise, your fingers grabbed gently on his jaw and you leaned even closer, swiping your thumb along the edge of his face.

-You've been being incredibly bad these last couple of days, you're very lucky you're pretty...- you whispered, millimeters away from his lips.

-What will you do to me?- he whispered back.

His eyes had gone from lustful to pleading, he was looking down at you with his mouth agape, you could stand on your knees and be taller than him in this position, but you wanted to remind him that it was someone smaller than him that was making him plead.

-You want to fuck me don't you?- you pouted seductively.

He nodded slowly.

-You want me to suck you off like i couldn't yesterday?- you smiled wickedly.

His jaw tensed but he nodded once again. You chuckled at his reaction.

-Here's what's going to happen since you want to be funny. You're going to get up and go to the bedroom, take everything off except your underwear- you looked up at his hair- And leave the bun on. You're gonna have the belt on your hands and you're gonna sit with your back against the headboard, and i will be the one to have fun, okay?-

He breathed in painfully slow and you could tell he was trying to catch his breath, he knew what was coming and he liked it, just as much as he liked that slap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes ik Narvi is the name of one of their sons not daughters but i liked that name for the fox and i had already made her a girl deal with it.
> 
> Man bun Loki is just exquisite change my mind.
> 
> Yes yes ik im mean but I didn't want to make this chapter too long cuz what i have planned for this next smut wheew chile.


	12. Dominance And Tenderness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: This chapter is entirely consistent of heavy smut, there is degrading, begging, slapping, tying, choking and hair pulling.  
> If you do not feel comfortable with any of these please skip this chapter  
> TW2: There is also mentions of suicidal thoughts, once again, if you're experiencing this plz talk to someone you trust, you matter 💕

After Loki left the bathroom you gave him a few minutes before you got out of the tub, you grabbed a towel and dried yourself, you stood naked in front of the mirror to check your appearance, letting the messy hair fall down your shoulders, you ran your hands up your thighs and waist, looking at the faint but still very much there teeth marks and hickeys he had left a few days ago. You were already enjoying the torture you were about to infringe on Loki by depriving him of you.  
With heat already starting to damp your sex you took one of the bandages stored in the medical kit, it was a little rough at the touch so you ran it between your fingers playfully and turned it into silk with the help of an illusion, you smirked to yourself.

Blueberry pie and dominance, this day was fun...

You walked into the room, he was sitting right where you told him, exactly how you told him, his chest rising and falling slowly as he waited. When his eyes found your figure they twitched, you grinned to yourself, every time you saw each other it felt like the first time, even though you knew every crevice of your scarred bodies, even if you knew them since before they were scarred.

You walked up to him slowly, giving him time to build his own anticipation, when you reached the side of the bed you sat down, your back facing him, you placed the now black piece of silk over the headboard, but his eyes never left yours, you turned and climbed up the bed, crawling to him, and you placed your legs on the sides of his hips, standing straight on your knees for him to gaze at your upper half, his face didn't let anything show but his eyes said it all, starving, craving eyes, the only windows to his trembling insides, that and the rock hard erection between his legs.  
Moonlight lit the room dimly, your hands went down his shoulders to his chest, pressing your nails gently against his porcelain skin, when you reached down you took the belt from his hands and as soon as you put it down his fingers slid to grip softly at your thighs right above your knee, when you didn't say anything his eyes left yours and followed the touch of his hands as they went up your front thighs, his fingers inches away from the warmth of your sex, stroking at the yellow marks of his teeth, before they traveled to the back, gripping on your ass before going up your waist to your back, he leaned to your stomach to kiss it when you pushed him away.

-Ah ah ah...- you shook your head at him.

His eyes shamelessly pleaded at you, but you wouldn't let him have his way, not yet. You grabbed his hands and brought them up your belly again, placing them over your tits, he kneaded them a few times before you pulled back down to reach your mound, you pulled one of his hands off and turned the other one, guiding his fingers to your folds, he understood and pressed two fingers against them, looking up at you, his mouth now agape like yours, you glided his fingers along your wet slit, the skin parting as you pressed and swayed your hips very slowly against his fingers, your breath hitched, enjoying his touch, fighting the urge to push them inside you.  
Once you had glided your entire wetness on his long fingers, you pulled them away, both your hands still grabbing onto his as you brought it up to your lips, you wrapped them around his wet fingers, slowly sucking up and down on your juices, his control now breaking as he watched your lips purse when you finished sucking on his fingers.

-Enjoying the view?- you hummed lowly.

-Very much...- 

-Good,- you smiled down at him-Because it's all you get to see.-

You dropped his hand and grabbed the blindfold, placing it over his puzzled eyes as he frowned, you tied it up in the back right above his bun and went to tie the belt in a loop around his wrists, his jaw tensed and he exhaled in frustration, when you were finishing you placed a deep but painfully short kiss on his lips and whispered.

-If you don't make me angry again and you behave, maybe you'll get to take these things off, but until then, they stay on, understood?-

He huffed after hesitating for a second or two, and nodded slowly. You landed another slap on his face.

-Understood?-

-Yes.-

-There you go...- you smiled.

He was so sexually frustrated it was almost cute, you granted him a deep angry kiss, he welcomed you and fought back with his lips and tongue as he pushed into you. You knew he could easily break the leather restrains he was on and overpower you, but he didn't want to, he liked this. You let out a moan against his mouth and ran your fingernails down his biceps, he grunted at the pain and you broke the kiss, pushing him back at the headboard as you reached for some extra pillows to put over the ones behind him to give you enough height, leaving his face just below your mound.

You ran one hand over his hair, the other holding on the headboard as to not lose balance. He felt the movement around him and he licked his lips, ready for you.

-Do you know what's in front of you?-

-Yes.-

-And do you want it?- you lifted his chin with your fingers.

-Yes.-

Once again you smirked to yourself at the anticipation on his breaths and the way he clenched his jaw, you guided his head forward, placing it over your mound and he ran his tongue over it, as soon as he found your pussy his mouth opened, the kisses now deep as he ran his tongue around your folds, your mouth opened at the sensation, you threw your head back in pleasure as he started sucking, taking the skin into his mouth, savoring your taste, running his teeth very gently around them.

His tongue followed, running up and down your wet cunt, his chin pressing on your inner thigh and his nose right above your clit, you bucked your hips forward to give him better access to the entirety of your pussy, his tongue pushing up at your entrance then going up to focus on your clit, swirling around and sucking hard, you gasped and moaned, closing your eyes in pleasure as your hips bucked once more.

-Ah...fuck, just like that...- you sighed through sharp breaths.

The grip on his hair tightened and he growled, the vibrations traveling through your clit and up you lower stomach as you rode his face, your orgasm starting to form quickly with the amazing pressure of his rough tongue on your clit. He kept sucking, his head following the movements every time his tongue left your bud to give your folds an extend swipe and come up again to keep teasing, you bit your lips hard as to not moan so much, but you couldn't help how hard you were gripping at his hair.

Your eyes opened to look down at him, his concentration on taking you to your high, his mouth was lost in between your pussy lips and he was humming and groaning against it, making you pant with vibrations, your orgasm growing closer and closer as you praised him with moans and an occasional whimper. His tongue only pressed harder and his lips wrapped around your now swollen clit, sucking hard as he felt you getting closer, your eyes shut for a second before you looked down again, you couldn't see his crotch but you just knew his dick was begging for attention.

-Make me cum darling...- you mumbled.

His teeth ran along your clit while he sucked and the sensitive contact was enough for you to go insane, you whimpered, loudly, and reached your climax, riding it out on his tongue as your hands gripped at the loose strands of hair in the back of his head. He ran his tongue slowly between your folds, tasting and collecting the last of your juices. You went back to straddle him, your face rested on his shoulders as you both caught your breaths, then you looked at him, his chin was wet with a mix between his spit and you, you laughed softly and kissed him slow, tasting yourself in his tongue, moaning against his lips.

-Mmm such a good boy,- your hand traveled down to his bulge as you kept kissing him, just like you expected, he was hard and eager for your touch, his breath hitched when you rubbed him over his boxers- I think it's your turn isn't it?-

He didn't get to respond with your lips deepening the kiss, your tongue dancing with his a bit more before you went down to his neck, biting hard, hearing him grunt then giving him the gentle touch of your tongue over the soon to be marks, you sucked and bit and kissed your way down his chest where you bit hard at the soft toned flesh and he hissed.

An eye for an eye, you chuckled to yourself, remembering the bite mark on your stomach.

When you reached the hem of his boxers you didn't waste time, he lifted his hips and you pulled the underwear down, his cock sprung free, big and desperate, already leaking precum, asking for your mouth. Your fingers gripped at the base and started pumping slowly, instantly lifting your gaze to look at his reaction, his chest was rising up and down expanding with ragged breaths, and his wrists shuffled uncomfortably in their restrains. His thighs tensed as your thumb teased the head of his cock, spreading the drop of precum around, he opened his mouth to speak.

-Syg...-he started.

-What is it my dear?- you said.

-Use your mouth- 

You looked up at him with dark eyes even though he couldn't see you, and studied his reaction as you tightened your grip on his throbbing length.

-If you want something you need to ask nicely. You need to convince me you deserve my mouth on your cock. Now beg.-

He swallowed, but didn't answer, and you kept your pace, waiting for him to meet your request.

-Use your mouth...please- he whispered.

-Mm no baby, i said beg.- you smiled at his shaft, pink with need.

-Please, use your mouth, please Siggy...- he knew you liked nicknames.

-Gods you're just desperate are you? Good, it makes you crumble and behave, just like you should with me.- you stated.

You ran your tongue slowly, starting at the very base, moving up, taking your time to get to the head, once there you licked the tip and a quiet moan escaped his mouth.

Some minutes passed before your lips wrapped around the head and they started sucking, going deeper and deeper down his cock as you bobbed your head, his head falling backwards and his arms extended to no avail, still very much tied up. Your throat relaxed allowing you to take all of him, you gagged at the effort but sucked hard as your lips reached the base, you heard a low groan erupting from him.

Quickly you pulled your head away from his now wet cock, he was holding back, not only the urge to rip the leather of the belt apart and yank at your hair, but he was holding back moans, his breaths ragged and quivering under your touch.

Your strokes became faster, pumping on his twitching cock, precum dripping down the side, your tongue brushed over the tip, that gained you a choked moan, you pressed your lips next, sucking very lightly, making circles with the tip of your tongue, one hand still jerking him off, the other one rubbing his thigh. You let out a pleased moan at the taste of the soft skin on the head of cock and another moan went out his lips, this time low and extended.

-Hmm getting close aren't we?-

-Y-yes...- he blurted out.

-Do you want to cum?- your tongue went up again from his base.

-Yes, please.- his voice wavered.

-Mmm what did i tell you? You need to ask nicely when you want something, and if you want to cum, you need to ask...-

He was practically panting at this point, your hand pumping fast and squeezing lightly at his shaft and your tongue swirling and pressing around the head.

-Please, i...may i cum?- he said, trying to keep his voice steady.

-No.-

Your mouth was off of him and your hand dropped leaving his dick untouched once again, he gasped and groan but before he could utter any protest you straddled him again, your cunt, once again pooling with wetness, swayed with your hips over his cock, and you grabbed at his throat, gripping just enough that another thin moan managed to come out, your hips moving and rubbing against his boner.

-Do you understand why I'm doing this, hm?- you spoke softly and seductively- You made me very angry yesterday...- you whined.

He tried to respond but your grip on his throat wouldn't let him and your hips increased their rhythm, causing his attempt at a response to choke out.

-You had forgotten had you? How i can ravish you just as much as you ravish me? But you love to be punished. I bet you're not even sorry you pissed me off.-

You loosened the grip on his neck, urging him to speak.

-Yes i am.- he stated, you could tell he was being honest.

-Really?- he nodded slowly- Tell me what you want.-

He swallowed as best as he could, his cock was glistening with your wetness.

-I want to fuck you...-

-You want to fuck me?- you chuckled- Prove it. Show me how sorry you are...-

Your mouth was inches away from his, your fingers leaving his throat to grip at his sharp jaw, your other hand slithered down and pressed the head of his cock against your entrance, your core tingling with anticipation, your breaths colliding in pants as you fought to keep your dominance together for just a bit longer.

-I'm sorry...I'm so sorry...- he moaned- I'm truly sorry, p-please...Syg...-

The nickname really got the best of you, you bit your lips and sunk down on his cock, stretching you out in a second, you gasped and he choked out a whine, your hips started swaying against him, the speed increasing as you grew accustomed to his size.  
You kissed along the line of his tight jaw, reaching the spot right by his ear, sucking lightly.

-You always feel so good my dear, hmm...- you bit your lips as your hips swayed, making his cock hit the right spot.

This wasn't even the angriest sex you've ever had. It still felt amazing to you, after all the times he had claimed you, made love to you, back in Asgard, in your room, in his room, by the waterfall, that time in the armory, maybe it was the time you've spent apart, no. It was both of you, it was the connection, the pleasure only you could bring to the other, how your bodies molded into each other like destiny itself, the weight of your bond.  
Love, that's what it was.

His cock hit your cervix as you rode him up and down, your second orgasm reaching your belly already, he buckled his hips up to move with you. Whimpers and jagged cries escaping from both of you.

-Sygin...i-please...i need to see you, please- he pleaded.

Your eyes opened to look down at him, his brows were knitted up in pleasure, strands of hair stuck to his forehead with sweat, as you imagined yours were too. The blindfold was off in a second and bright familiar blue flooded your vision, his eyes focusing on yours as you quickened the pace between your damp bodies.

The room filled with sobs and whines when you both reached your highs, Loki never took his eyes off of you and you felt his cock fill you up, your hands squeezing on his shoulder blades as you rode out your second orgasm.

TW: Mentions of suicidal thoughts ahead❗️

When your breaths evened out and his brow relaxed, you kissed his lips tenderly, feeling both your climaxes dripping down your thighs, and you begun undoing the belt around his wrists. You felt his gaze still on you.

-Yesterday...when you came back,- Loki started- You laid in bed, and you were hurt...you didn't want to wake up...-

-Loki.- your lip quivered, you didn't want to talk about it.- I'm fine.-

-I felt it...and i asked you to come closer, when you didn't answer...I thought you hated me- 

There was a pause, that's what he had said when you were about to pass out, you looked into his eyes, they were dim and guilty, and you cupped his face, kissing him.

-No...no- you shook your head- I didn't hate you Loki, I couldn't.- you trailed off.

When your legs stopped trembling you slid him out of you, slowly you lifted your leg and let your weight fall on your side of the bed, facing away from him. You reached your hand to him.

-Come closer...- you whispered.

The mattress shifted and he took your hand, you placed it over your hip as he hugged your body from behind, and you pulled the covers over you. His fingers caressed your thigh in loving slow patterns.

-I really am sorry...-

-I know-

You felt a soft kiss on your cheek, and a smile was drawn on your face.


	13. Memory

You had woken up about an hour ago, it was 11 am when you checked the clock on the wall. You managed to carefully turn around under Loki's grip to face him, he was still very much asleep, his palms flat against your skin as though he needed your warmth to survive. He was still in the position he had held you last night, he would often do that, go to sleep and barely move an inch during the night, he even had his hair tied still, only a few lose strands falling here and there. 

How is it he had never tied his hair in a bun before? He looked so damn handsome. You looked at him, really looked at him, his bushy brows sitting on a small frown, his lashes, the way the bridge of his nose was slightly bent to his right, the thin line that were his lips. A selfish part of you wished that he'd wake up so you could look into the blues and grays of his eyes...  
Just then he shifted his body, slowly, inhaling deeply as he woke up, and moved his head up to place a kiss on your forehead, then he opened his eyes, looking down at you, gorgeous ocean blue with a hint of slumber connected with you.

-Better?-

-You heard me?- your eyes widened.

-I did...- he smirked.

The soul bond tied your souls and your minds, and sometimes, you'd get a hint of what the other was thinking, you couldn't hear each other's thoughts, it was more like a third eye you shared, a sixth sense that just whispered to you both.

-What were you thinking of?-

-Just how good your hair looks tied up like this- you ran your hands up his chest.

-Really? I don't like it...it was for practical reasons...- he raised a brow.

You giggled lightly. A smile tugged on your lips as you remembered that time you showed him how to braid hair and he pretended he didn't care, but then braided yours when you weren't looking. It was probably one of the cutest things he had done. You quickly realized it wasn't you who was remembering it, it was him, your smile grew.

-I thought it was very sweet when you braided my hair-

-Hmm, you looked beautiful, but i have to say i quite like how you've been wearing it...-

-You mean just loose?-

He hummed, brushing his fingers through the small strand over your forehead and bringing it back with the others. His hand then fell to your cheek, he leaned in, his lips coming to contact with your jaw, going down to your neck, you laid back giving him better access and he lifted himself to hover above you, holding his weight on his forearm. You felt his lips going down but his hand was ahead of him, it traveled down to your chest, caressing your breasts from the side, squeezing them very lightly before continuing over your belly.

-Hmm back at it again already? And i thought i had worn you out yesterday...- you grinned.

His kisses reached your sternum, lose hairs from his bun tickling your skin. He chuckled.

-You did...but i never grow tired of you, you know that darling.- his hands went back to your breasts- Besides, you didn't let me touch you last night...-

-Ahh...thats what it is then- you chuckled at his resentment.

His hands were gripping on your waist, running up and down your sides, caressing your thighs then going back up to your stomach, his eyes remained closed as he took you in.

-Your body, such a tender gift to my senses...I wish to destroy it and worship it at the same time...-

You melted under his words, not of lust, this wasn't a lustful moment, this was Loki showing affection, little were the times he did that so openly, in fact, you could count the times he had said "I love you" to you with the fingers of one hand, but the times he showed that he loved you? That list was as long as he is tall.  
He spoke lovingly, you could remember the last time he had spoken to you like that, it was a split second, a glitz of care left in him, before you went into exile. The time before you left hadn't been exactly happy, you were, on a break, sort to speak. He was too deep into his obsession with power and his mind too twisted around Thanos' intentions that, for a minute, you thought you'd lost him, he wasn't interested in you, he didn't care for you or anybody. Then he was brought back to Asgard, chained up and muzzled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

You sat on the ground of your home, miles away from the palace, miles away from him. It had been so long since you'd seen him, you were afraid of what you'll see, but you needed to see him. You controlled your breaths as well as you could, thinking of him, of the palace, his room, his face. A pressure lifted off of your chest and you shot your eyes open, golden glistened over your view, you were inside the palace, well, a version of you was.

You paced through the hallway, heading towards the well known location. When you reached it you saw an excessive yet useless amount of guards, the all father must know that if Loki were to run away, those guards wouldn't have a clue, didn't he?   
But he wasn't running away, he was in there, you could feel it.

A knot formed on your chest before you went in through the wall, stepping into his room. There he was, a little less thinner than the last time you saw him, it gave you a little relief, at least he was healthier. His hands were clasped behind his back, his head slowly turned around, when he sensed you he shifted to look at you, for a second, a gust of shock and almost joy flew by his eyes. His expression however, gave nothing away.

-Loki...- 

-Sygin.- he stated, your name rough on his tongue but his voice missed dearly by you.

A few seconds of silence went by as you took him in, he seemed, indifferent, as if your presence didn't faze him at all, and you couldn't find the words to begin with. The only thing you managed to get out was the sentiment you had nestled on since the last time you saw him.

-I missed you...-

-You were the one to leave.- he replied quickly, a sharp blow to your gut.

-I did it for the sake of us.-

-You did it for the sake of you.- he hissed- You could've stayed by my side, we could've conquered worlds together. Have power like we've never had before.-

He leaned in slightly and you thought you saw sympathy in his face, but it wasn't real, it wasn't him.

-Loki that power is already ours and you know that, you are already as strong as you want to be-

-Why must you insist on bringing me down?-

-I have never brought you down! If anything i have always supported you in your desire to become king. I've always thought you were at least more deserving of it than your father. Listen to yourself, these are not your words they make no sense.- you meant what you said, even if you knew his desire wasn't really the throne, but to be heard.

-Yet when i am given the opportunity to be king, you walk away...-

-You know exactly why i walked away!- you spat, choking away tears.

-Then why come back?!-

-To see my husband!!-

-WELL HE'S NOT HERE!-

There was a pause as you felt a dagger to your heart, tears rolled down your cheeks, quickly followed by more, your eyes twitching at him in disbelief. Deep down you knew he didn't mean that, that he wasn't himself, not completely. You knew his mind was yet to be free from Thanos' meddling, but it hurt.

-...Yes, yes he is. He's in there somewhere, twisted and confused, but he's there. And i still love him, I've never stopped loving him...- you shook your head slowly, feeling your illusion growing weaker, the sadness too much to bare.

-Then why didn't you fight for him?- his tone was cold but in his eyes you saw tears brimming.

A defeated huff escaped your lips, heavy with the memory of venom and pain, of excruciating torture tracing down your spine.

-I did...- your voice broke in a whimper.

His gesture now matched his eyes, growing softer, his eyes fell to the necklace around your neck, his promise and yours. Before you could take your chance to speak again, you felt your feelings take over the strength of your illusion, as you faded away you saw him take a step forward, but before he could reach you you were back in your home again.

You opened your tear filled eyes, gazing into nothing, feeling like nothing.

-And I'd do it again...- you whispered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What a bitter moment to remember right now, but how great to remember it as what it was, a distant memory, pain that had already ceased. Your eyes found Loki's as he came back up to meet you. 

-What's wrong dear?- the soft sternness on his face much more likable than the accusatory glares he had given you back then.

-Nothing i just...-you remembered his earlier praise of affection- I missed this Loki.- 

You smiled sweetly at him, his gaze soft when he looked into your eyes, he gave you a small closed smile and pressed his lips against your forehead.  
You wiggled out of his hold when he broke the moment and stood up, he eyed you as you did.

-I'm gonna brush my teeth i wanna kiss you- you pouted.

He smirked and followed you into the bathroom, his hand undid the now very messy bun, letting the shiny black locks fall again over his shoulders. You both brushed your teeth and you washed your face. Before you could walk out of the bathroom he grabbed you by the arm and turned you around, before you could say anything his lips were on yours, tasting sweet and minty, your hands cupped his face as you hummed against his mouth, his hands wrapped around your waist and he started pushing you back, you giggled when he kept pushing you onto the bedroom until you reached the bed.

Your mouth only left his to fall on the bed, he climbed on top of you, if you would've taken your eyes off of him for a second you would've seen his already hard length pointing up at you, instead you felt it against your thigh as he slithered in between them. He kept his lips on you, pushing his tongue in to deepen the kiss, you moaned, feeling the growing heat on your crotch.

In a second his mouth left and so did his body above you and you felt empty as you watched him stand up and walk to the dresser.

-You should get dressed, we have things to do - he spoke, his back facing you.

An angry huff left through your nose and you could hear the smirk on his face, he turned around, your thighs still open to him as you leaned back on your forearms.

-Everything alright dear?- he raised his brows.

You looked at the bite mark on his chest.  
-That's a bold action for someone who was begging to get his cock sucked last night - you grinned.

He drew a sharp breath and headed for the bathroom, you on the other hand headed for the kitchen, an idea already coming to you for your playful dance, you needed a pie.

Loki's POV:

When he went into the bathroom he heard her stand up, he really just did it to avoid flipping her over and splitting her open with his thrusts, but it was worth it just to tease her, to see her breaths hitch as she too tried to contain the pleasure, only to unravel under him later.

But after years of the same playful teasing and sexually frustrating each other he'd still feel pleased at her next move, and today wasn't the exception. He walked over to the kitchen and there she was, sitting up on the counter, still completely naked, eating pie.

-I thought i told you to get dressed...-

He watched her chew and swallow on a bite, the long strands of her hair falling down to her nipples, hard with the cold air. She nodded innocently, even if there was nothing innocent about what she was doing.

-And i will, but first come try a blueberry- she pinched one small fruit between her thumb and index.

Loki's brow furrowed as he walked closer, she held the fruit up and looked at him with a relaxed gaze, he placed his hands on her bare knees and leaned in to try the blueberry, but instead her fingers went inside her mouth, he watched her suck on them and moan, wrapping her lips around her thumb, moving it in her mouth as she hummed, he squeezed on her knees purposely hard to get her to stop, she pulled her thumb out.

-It's good isn't it?- he heard her say, but his eyes were on her lips.

His breathing was increasing but he didn't want her to stop, he wanted to force her down to her knees and fuck her throat, but he wouldn't let her find that out, he wouldn't let her win.  
His fingers stroked on her knees, going up her thighs, feeling the skin getting sensitive from the cold.

He brought one of his hands to lift her chin, gifting her an intense look straight into her eyes, his thumb stroked over her lips, he knew how much she liked his stare.

\- Mouth watering...- he said, a deep tone emerging from his throat.

He pulled back, denying his touch to her again, and leaned against the table, he crossed his legs as to conceal the still bulging erection on his pants, waiting for her next move.

She must've been desperate at this point because all she did was spread her legs wide open, exposing her entire wetness to him, leaning back slightly against her palms. Her hair fell from over her breasts and he could see the hard nubs on top of them.

-You're going to get cold.-

-Then come warm me up...- she whispered.

He smirked, he had won, and now he was gonna fuck her senseless.  
Even though he tried not to look so eager, his speed betrayed him, his hand grasping on her throat as he attacked on her lips and around her mouth with his tongue, her hands undid his pants and quickly pulled them down, he grunted as he felt his cock coming free from the fabric.

She didn't waste time, pushing the tip of him against her entrance, he felt the warm lips of her pussy gripping around him, he pushed forward, striking her with unforgiving firm thrusts, a whimper left her mouth, her legs instinctively opening wider just for him, just for his cock to bury deep inside her dripping cunt.

Loki's hand gripped tighter at her jaw, keeping her right where he wanted, both their eyes closed shut in pleasure. She was clenching around him, her walls velvet soft and tight around him, her arms holding onto his, nails digging on his shoulders as he slammed into her, his free hand supporting her from the small of her back.

-Ah fuck...Loki...- she whined.

He looked down at her, her brow pinched and raised every time he pounded into her, letting him know that was the spot. He kissed her again, his moans and groans spilling out into her mouth, his thumb stroking her jaw as their bodies pressed together so tightly her breasts almost stopped bouncing against his chest. Yesterday was fun but now that he could touch her, see her, he felt himself climbing up to his climax quickly.

-That's the spot isn't it?- he breathed out, careful not to show his voice breaking.

She nodded and hummed in agreement, biting her lip hard as to not whimper so loud, he didn't like that, he wanted her to be loud. His hand went around to grab a fistful of her hair and yank her head back, she gasped at the motion.

-Don't you dare hold back, i want to hear every noise coming from that pretty little mouth- he stated through gritted teeth.

She was close, he could feel it, and so was he. His cock pounded deeper and faster, skin slapping sloppily as he drove her mad with pleasure.

-OH GODS...- a string of choked moans and panting followed- hmm...i-i'm gonna...- 

Loki grinned to himself, slowing down his thrusts. Her hands squeezed his biceps.  
-What do you want darling?-

-I want to, i wanna c-cum...- she blubbered.

He brought his lips close to hers, her mouth agape and her eyes heavy.

-Then beg.-

-Mmm...please...please may i cum?- she whispered, his cock still pounding, slow but hard.

-Cum for me little one-  
He held her back once again and buckled his hips, pumping into her harder as her walls hugged him and her thighs clenched, she gasped and whined and threw her head back, Loki's lips found her neck and he bit on it before reaching his high, both their mouths wide open as they came undone, twitching against each other.

Loki buried his face in her neck, very slowly moving inside of her as he went soft, he took in her scent, the accelerated pulse and her deep breathing. He smiled, starting to chuckle inevitably, his shoulders shaking as he laughed against the crook of her neck.

Your POV:

His eyes met you again as his laugh ceased, you kissed him deeply, running your fingers through the ends of his hair. He slid out of you, stroking your thigh.

-Thor contacted me...- he started- He insists we should meet with him and his Avengers, they need to know what we know...- he said softly, holding you against him.

With Loki being around again, and the constant sexual tension he carried with him, it was easy to forget there was a fight about to unravel, the biggest fight you two would have to fight, and win. The fight against Thanos.

You couldn't help but think he could've told you not when his cum was dripping from your entrance.

-I heard that...- he grinned.

-Does your brother think they'll be willing to trust us?- you sighed and looked up at him.

-No. But if they need us, they'll have to...-

You only hummed in response, wanting to postpone talking about battle until the very last minute. He held you close and you kissed him, pressing against his warm skin.

-Get dressed Syg, your skin is cold- he said between your kisses.


	14. The Weight Of Hope

You whispered an "ok" to him and slowly jumped off the counter, now that the heat of sex had gone down you realized just how cold it was. Loki held your arms as if he were scared your knees would buckle, to be honest, between the shivering cold and your orgasm your legs did feel a bit weak.

You freshened up and got dressed, you looked for Loki and found him in the dining room, looking around the space, a livened up fire on the chimney that you approached eagerly.

-You know, it snows here in the winter, but not like Jotunheim snow, this is less...harsh, it's quite the sight, white washes over everything and there's a calming silence, i think you'd like that- you thought out loud.

-I like this better than your old home, back in Asgard...this is bigger.-

You shook your head and laughed.  
-I'm glad it meets your standards your highness- 

He rolled his eyes.  
-You're a royal too you know? A princess technically-

A disgusted yet playful gesture twisted on your face, you knew you were a Princess, being married to a Prince and all, but you preferred not to talk about it, you'd prefer Queen if you had to choose, or your favorite:

-I like Goddess better...- you smiled.

Loki smirked at you, walking closer, he took your hand and kissed your cold knuckles delicately, then placed his other hand over to warm yours up.

-My Goddess...- he looked up at you- There are matters to attend to, we need to get ready to leave-

-Aand we need a plan to get these people to trust us...-

He scoffed.  
-They don't have a choice-

You wrapped your arms around his neck, looking up at him, being so tall your neck actually bended from the angle.  
-I know you'd love to have your fun with them but you're gonna need to be a good boy, at least until we're all on the same page...-

Loki sighed down at you, his hands on your waist, you didn't mind that he wanted to mess around with them, a part of you was looking forward to it, but if they didn't have a choice neither did you, you would all have to work together, even if they tried to kill your husband, even if they had a good reason to back then. 

-You don't know them like i know them, they're arrogant and impulsive and they can be very sensitive- he rolled his eyes.

-Huh, i wonder who they remind me of?- you tilted your head pretending to think.

-Alright.- he pushed you off but you giggled, pulling him closer.

-Ohh you know i'm playing come on- you kissed his cheek.- God of Stubbornness...- you mumbled.

He scowled at you, his jaw clenching, he wanted to say something but he knew if he did he would just prove your point, instead you decided maybe it was time to get serious, as much as you hated what was coming forward, wanting to simply stay in this homey, more peaceful moment.

-Is your brother coming to get us?-

-Yes, two days from now-

You nodded, breathing in slowly, at least you had some time to prepare mentally, not for meeting the Avengers, no, but for the reason you were meeting them, because this wasn't any fight, it was The Fight. This was Thanos.

****  
Before you were ready to leave, there was something you wanted to do, you didn't know when exactly you'd be back and when you did you hoped your friend would still be here. You stepped out of the house and into the woods, hopefully she'll be nearby.

-Narvi!- you whistled a soft tune.

After wandering around for a bit, you saw her from far away, trotting your way, when she came nearer she lowered her ears, making sounds of excitement.

-Hello pretty girl...- you smiled down at her, pulling a soft fabric collar from your pocket with a small bell attached to it.

She sniffed it and let you put it on, it fell loose around her neck but not loose enough to fall.

-The bell is enchanted, that way, if you're near home but in the forest, i can still hear you, and you can visit me, I'll be gone for a while but I'll be back- you smiled down at her, she rolled on the ground and you scratched her tummy.

Two days went by quickly, you thought they would, time does that when one isn't looking forward to something, Loki told you you'd be meeting the Valkyrie, that you were looking forward to, a smile tugged on your face every time you thought about it, he mentioned that she might have something to tell you that will please you, a part of you knew what it was, after so long, the knot on your chest still tightened when you thought of what happened to your mother, what Odin had done to her and your family.

After a long time of playing with your very feisty friend you figured it was time to head back to the house and finish packing up. Not that there was that much to pack but you wanted to be meticulous with what you carried.  
You found Loki eyeing a record player with furrowed brows, probably thinking to himself how useless and stupid the gadget looked.

-It plays music- you stood by his side.

-I thought Midgardians were more advanced than this- 

-They are- you chuckled- This is old, some collect them, i think they consider them unique...OH! I have one just for you hold on-

A/N: I recommend you listen to Lacrimosa by Amadeus since that's what we're talking about here 

You walked besides him and looked through a tall storage box by the record player, skimming through the wide black discs until you found it, smiling you stood up and placed it over the platter, dropping the needle carefully.

-I thought of you when i heard this...- you looked up at him waiting for his reaction.

As the symphony started and the low voices of the chorus invaded the room, you breathed deeper, zoning out as the slow playing of the orchestra took you away, the air felt thicker with the tempo of the music and it made you straighten your back, you watched a smirk growing on Loki's face, his brows relaxed and his breathing got deeper, synchronizing with yours, he liked it.

-It's almost...- 

-Intimidating.- you finished for him, he looked at you with dilated pupils and a grin. He gave you a nod.

While the tune played for him you walked to the bedroom and crouched down to separate the headboard from the wall more than it already was, there was a reason you had it that way, to store the last item you needed to retrieve, it had been long since you've had to use it. You stuck your arm on the back of the headboard and slid out your favorite weapon, the turquoise blade as volatile and brilliant as you remembered, the last bit of memory from your family. 

A Dragonfang.

Lost in the smooth but sharp surface of the sword you didn't notice Loki walking in until he stood in front of you, eyeing the weapon as well.

-You still have it...-

-Of course,- you smiled down at the used hilt- It was my mother's...-

Now he was smiling at you.

-Do you remember how to use it?-

You gripped the hilt, positioning it properly in your hand, feeling it's weight, you gave it a twirl then spun it around quickly, it turned with your arm and in an instant the bright blade rested against Loki's throat. His hands went up in surrender.

-I think i'll do just fine- you smirked at him, enjoying how dark his eyes suddenly got as he returned your smirk.

The time came to leave, a part of you felt as you should look around the cabin that you'd been calling home for the last 5 years, that period of time wasn't long when you've lived more than a thousand years, but the weight the house carried, the weight of hope, the weight of patience and resilience, you had barely left this place waiting for Loki, time to time not even leaving in fear that Loki would come back to you and you wouldn't be there to receive him. The house had seen so much of your faltering connection to him, the thread that tied both of you sometimes so tense from the distance you'd feel like it'd break and with it, your stability. You'd made these walls your space. 

But you'd be back, Loki assured you of it as you stood at the field leading up to the entrance with a bag thrown over your shoulder, looking back at it, you flashed him a nod, you knew you would...or at least you hoped so. And maybe when it was all over, you could sit on his lap next to the fire and show him the snow.

Not far from there a ship landed and out the ramp came Thor and a tall dark skinned man you recognized instantly, he smiled when he saw you and raised his brows, opening his arms to a hug.

-Heimdall!- you exclaimed, hugging him.

-Sygin...how good to find you well- he pulled you close and you patted his back- Thank goodness you're back- he whispered, you chuckled over his shoulder.

-Thank you for keeping an eye on him- you pulled back, happy to see yet another familiar face.

Heimdall was an old friend, or well, more like an ally you supposed, if someone knew about a royal romance scandal in Asgard well, it was non other than the man who sees everything, maybe there wasn't honor between thieves but there sure was between crown traitors, he kept more secrets than you and Loki combined and between those secrets, your title and your marriage. Looking back it was comical how guilty you felt when you left him alone with the 1058 years old toddler that is Loki, but to be fair, you're the one who shares a soul with him.

You made your way into the ship, looking around since it had been a while since the last time you stepped foot in one, the technology was different from an Asgardian ship and this one was rather dirty. You noticed yet another individual you had met before, the raccoon from last time was sitting at the pilot's seat and barely turned around to acknowledge you.

-So the bad guy has a girlfriend huh?- he said crossing his arms.

-Nice to see you too Rocket.- he snarled.

You couldn't help a grin at the exchange, as everyone settled down on their respective seats you walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

-Promise you'll behave, at least for a while- you raised your brows at him.

-Only if you promise you won't...- he smirked down at you.

You looked away to the cockpit, his smirk passing onto you, maybe if the situation allowed it you'd let yourself have some fun, you'd have to test the waters first.  
The rest of the trip consisted of Loki filling you in with each of these Avengers, quite peculiar individuals, you were rather looking forward to meet them, if they were anything like Strange they would sure be interesting. You hoped Loki was being fair on them and giving you the data without involving his personal view from each of them.

Talking to Heimdall felt like being back on Asgard, you two weren't really that close, your main connection being Loki's shenanigans, and that is precisely what he was catching you up with.

-You attacked Thanos with a DAGGER??- your eyes widened at him, flashing him a glare with a hint of shock.

-A bit louder darling I don't think they heard you in Alfheim.- he cocked a brow.

-Are you mad??- you asked, irritated.

His jaw clenched as a low huff exhaled from his nose.  
-I provided a distraction that bought us time to evacuate the people and fight him back.-

You were about to scowl him a bit more pointing out all of the other abilities he could've used for that when Thor interrupted.

-We're here!-

The three of you walked to the front of the ship, you leaned in closer to take a look through the glass at the gigantic metallic facilities surrounded by trees, it seemed to be far from any town or city, why would only 6 individuals need such enormous quarters? Your mind wandered with curiosity as the ship lowered down onto the grass and you saw two men and a woman waiting for you.

You stood up to look at Loki then back at the cockpit, a small grin tugged at your mouth.

-This is where the fun begins- you teased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes that is in fact, a star wars reference.  
> I'm not a huge fan of this chapter, we're getting more into plot and that makes me nervous lmao


	15. Upper Hand

It only took a step out of the ship's ramp for your cunning to call your attention, your eyes twitched as you focused, they shifted over to the woman, she was her, she was the Valkyrie, an eager gesture formed in your face as you walked closer.

When your attention went back to the present you realized you were in front of another face you've seen before standing in between the Valkyrie and a man Thor was talking with.

-Bruce, good to see you again- you smiled. He offered you a nod.

-I don't believe we've met- the Valkyrie stretched out her hand, she was barely taller than you- Brunnhilde.-

-Yes, the Valkyrie, you punched my husband in the face- you shook her hand.

-I...yes, i did-

-I'm sure he had it coming...- you chuckled.

You saw a gust of relief on her face as she raised her brows and chuckled with you, once again you were interrupted by Thor who insisted you all got inside to start discussing the nearby future. The Asgardians refugees had been accommodated as best as they could around the compound and suddenly you understood why they were in need of such a big residence, although how many immigrants from different worlds could this planet possibly get?

Three men in suits appeared in the hallway walking your way, they held very serious and stern expressions as they stopped to meet you halfway. Your brows furrowed in suspicion.

-Secretary Ross, to what do i owe the pleasure?- the man you didn't know spoke, walking forward with the help of what looked like a metal harness around his legs.

-It isn't a pleasure when you let a terrorist back into this planet Colonel.-

You assumed the terrorist was Loki.

-My brother means no harm being here, he helped us get the refugees to safety. Him and Sygin have agreed to share their experience with Thanos to help us in the fight against him.- he stepped forward.

-Sygin?- the man said to the Colonel but looked over at you, you kept your face neutral- Another undocumented Asgardian Rhodes? What makes you think you can go behind my back when you still have 4 fugitives out there?-

-To be fair sir they are fugitives because you chose to call them that.-

-They are criminals, and so is Loki, i think you'll recall. I'll be the judge of whether their intentions are true, these two are coming with me whether they want to or not.-

One of the men besides him pulled out two sets of very thick handcuff like restrains. Loki shifted his position next to you, growing frustrated at the situation, most likely holding back his reaction, you decided since no one was going to take a step up, then you will.

-I'll go...- you lifted your chin.

-What?-

-What?-

Loki and Thor looked at you followed by the rest of the people around the group.

-If you want me to be interrogated then so be it, but i have a condition.-

-This isn't a negotiation- the old man squinted at you.

-Oh trust me, it isn't - you smiled at him, the only way they were getting somewhere was if you let them.- You'll let me and Loki help freely after i tell you exactly what you need to know. But you're not putting me in a cell.- you stated.

-And how does that benefit me in any way?-

-It doesn't. Because despite what you Midgardians always like to think, this isn't about you. But if you want my intentions and Loki's, then you'll leave us free, if not...- you shot a glare and a grin so defying that it could burn through skin- Then you're more than welcome to fight me.-

The tall man considered you, his mustache twitching slightly as he bit his cheek, he could tell he couldn't mess with you. It frustrated him. Everyone's eyes were on him now, expecting him to make the decision they knew he would make, except for Loki, whose eyes were on you, either in confusion or in wonder, you couldn't tell, you were still holding your offering through your glare.

-Handcuffs on and you'll give me what i need.- the man spoke, his chin lifting as he waited for your answer.

Your expression relaxed to fake softness and you gave him a small smirk, lifting your wrists to let them cuff you, Loki was still looking at you with hidden confusion, but he trusted you. You could only imagine since Loki nor Thor hadn't mentioned them these men would be no more than a pain on your side, you knew abuse of power when you saw it. They needed to get out of the way.  
They escorted you alongside Thor and Loki, taking you all to a separate room with a long table and a few chairs and couches, it certainly didn't look like somewhere where you'd interrogate someone, in fact it looked rather casual.

-Alright then- the older man got handed a small set of papers and a pen, he gestured for you to sit down and you did, he looked down at you once before sitting across from you.

-Name.- he started.

-Sygin.-

-Full name.-

-Sygin.- you cocked a brow.

He huffed, Loki and Thor were standing besides the doorframe, both with furrowed brows watching your actions and the secretary's. The man you now recognized as Rhodes entered the room then, and stood against the wall behind the secretary and his minions. He looked up at you again and you waited.

-Age?-

-1.067- that was a question you couldn't remember the last time it had been asked.

Rhodes' eyes widened in surprise and the man's minions exchanged puzzled looks for a second before they regained their neutral expressions.

-She's older than you?- Thor whispered to Loki. He gave Thor a nod.

-What's your relation to Thor and Loki?-

You cocked a brow at him, what an unnecessary question. You shrugged.  
-I'm married to Loki.-

-And Thor?-

-No, just Loki...- you smiled.

He glared at you and your smile widened, you could tell Loki was smirking. The Secretary whispered something to one of his minions and he stood up and left through the door, the entire time your eyes were focused on the secretary, your state calm and your mind two steps ahead.

-Are you aware your...husband- he looked over at him- is a war criminal?-

Your head tilted and your brows fell.  
-My husband? The God of Mischief?- you said.

Before he could speak the minion came back with what looked like a tablet, the secretary tapped around for a while and pulled a file, he slid the tablet over the table to you, a hologram over the screen with a file symbol that opened to a number of different categories inside that same file, at the top left corner it read "Loki of Asgard".

-Loki, God of Lies.- he insinuated, leaning over the table- Are you fully aware of everything he's done? His reputation here on my planet? Go ahead and take a look.- he leaned back again as if he had really done something.

He really did think that Loki had literally brought you to the conflicts of his past without you knowing of them.  
You lifted your cuffed hands and slid the tablet back to him, making sure he didn't notice they were already unlocked.

-I am fully aware of what my husband did and didn't do. You're wasting your time with the wrong threat Secretary.- you shot him another glare.

-I will be the judge of that. You are on my planet darling, that means that you are under the jurisdiction of the United Nations as an undocumented immigrant, which means you will not go around freely wherever you want until I approve it. Nobody makes any move on any threat unless I allow it,- he leaned closer to you over the table- You don't have the upper hand here, as much as you'd like to have it, understood? -

You could see Loki shifting in his spot while the man spoke, being approximately 5 seconds from cutting his tongue. You on the other hand were about to start laughing at the audacity of this bitch. The chair creaked very slightly as you leaned over mimicking his posture in a mocking manner, you squinted at him.

A threat, how sweet...

-First of all, there are two people in this entire galaxy allowed to call me darling, one of them is dead, an i'll let the other one kill you if you say that to me again.- you cocked your head towards Loki, who was wearing a glare as sharp as his cheekbones- Secondly, I've been going around freely in your planet for 5 years, I don't care about your approval, I don't care about your United Nations and I certainly don't care about your jurisdiction. If this is your attempt at trying to protect your world then no wonder you needed to assemble an entire team to stop my husband, now an individual 20 times more dangerous is heading straight for your head and not only are you holding back the fighters you pleaded to to protect your precious planet, but you're also threatening the only two people that are offering their help, and you think you have the upper hand? Pathetic. Comical. That's what this is.- 

You spat your words at him, in your face a smug expression was mixed with shocked brows knitted between your eyes, you were truly dumbfounded at this man. He shrunk under your tone and opened his mouth to interrupt you but by the time you were done, he knew he had nothing valid to say, he could try to lock you up, he could try to fight you, and he would lose, you made sure to get that message through his thick Midgardian skull.   
You stood up straight and threw the heavy handcuffs over the table in a despicable manner, then leaned over your palms, making him feel even smaller.

-And how dull is your mortal brain to think you could restrain a damn Goddess with handcuffs?- you shook your head.

He didn't assume you were a Goddess, which only made him look more stupid at the moment, he swallowed and sat straight on his chair, you turned towards the door when he finally spoke.

-You didn't tell me what i needed.- 

You rolled your eyes and turned back to him already exasperated.

-Thanos will destroy the entire Earth and when we're all dead on the soil he'll use the power of the Infinity Stones to wipe out half the beings in the entire universe. But that doesn't concern you, because there is nothing you can do to help except to get out of our way.-

His eyes squinted in confusion but you didn't stay to clear his doubts, you walked up to the door and turned to Rhodes, gesturing towards the exit.

-Shall we?-

He tried to hold back a smile as he gave you a nod, walking out of the room in front of you to guide you three to the people actually worth your time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate Ross, with a passion.


	16. A Rough Patch

As you walked through hallways and passed a number of doors you looked around, taking everything in, just in case, you could tell Loki was doing the same. You all arrived to what seemed like a big lounge and scattered around it, a number of people you could recognize by putting together Loki's descriptions. He stood leaning his back against a wall and crossed his arms, his "God of Mischief" demeanor back on again, you sat on a chair placed against another wall perpendicular to where he stood, not too far away, but far enough that you could both exchange silent looks of opinion when you wished to without calling attention.

Thor exchanged greetings around the room, just then you felt a familiar tug of energy and through the door came Doctor Strange and a shorter man with a very stressed gesture covered by sunglasses that he then took off in a swift movement. Rhodes approached him to speak with him and their eyes fell on Loki and you for a moment before the man spoke.

-Alright...children, gather round.- he stroked his chin in a nervous manner.

-Tony, have you called him?- Bruce asked.

The man seemed to get more tense at this question and quickly dismissed the topic.

-No, no I haven't...reindeer games, good to have you back- he pointed casually at Loki- Glad to see you brought the misses along-

Loki rolled his eyes and contained a scoff, you let a small smirk tug at your lips. The man, Tony, looked around the room and you realized he didn't know a fair amount of the people here, but those he knew were looking at him, expecting. You figured he must be the boss in some way.  
The individuals he didn't know had called themselves the Guardians of The Galaxy, according to Loki. You wondered if their reputation did justice to their name, Loki's word claimed it did not, then again, it's Loki's word.

They consisted of a few individuals you didn't care about, and Thanos' daughters. Thank heavens Loki had filled you in on them, otherwise your sword would be sunken into their guts right now, but you quickly understood it was a family betrayal situation, or as you liked to call it...the Odinson effect.

-Tony you need to call him, this is too big we need the whole team here.- Bruce insisted, he seemed to be very shaken up by this whole situation.

Although he was right, on your recount of the infamous Avengers, you were missing about half of them. You threw a questioning look at Loki who returned with a raised brow, he also didn't know what was happening.

-Stark the more of us there are the more chances we have against Thanos- Strange added.

-It isn't that easy, okay wizard? I have a whole government breathing down my neck about them, what do you want me to do huh? Welcome him here with a banner that says "Sorry Cap, welcome back!" ?- his voice seemed to shudder at the last part.

-The Captain? That's what this is about?- Loki's brows pinched harshly and his mouth fell agape.

Tony sighed heavily and Thor gave Loki a nod which only made his brows wrinkle even tighter.

-The Avengers are going through a, um...well a rough patch.- Thor added carefully, looking down at the floor in mild embarrassment.

-Oh I'm sorry does the threat against the entire population of the universe come at a bad time?- Loki sassed and let out a dry laugh- This is just perfect, your world about to fall in shambles and The Avengers bickering with each other, i always knew you were all just weak and emotional mortals.- he spat, now standing straight with balled up fists at his sides.

-Easy.- you replied quickly in a warning tone.

He looked back at you and you cocked your brow slowly, he was growing frustrated and you could tell, you didn't blame him, but you needed these people to cooperate. He drew in a sharp breath, you'd pay for that later, one way or another. When you pulled away your gaze from his a few surprised looks found you around the room, maybe it was time to speak.

-I think what Loki is trying to say is, this battle is far bigger than any rough patch you might all be going through.- you tilted your head.

-And what i think you all need to understand is these people are fugitives now, criminals, if i bring them in they will have them arrested.- Tony emphasized that last part to you.

-I'm sorry, what happened that was so bad between you all?- Rocket gestured with his arms.

A small silence fell over the room, tension filled and heavy silence, you all waited for an answer while Thor, Bruce and Tony went back and forth between looking at each other and at the floor. You widened your eyes slightly at Loki who returned it cocking a brow at you, you wished you could read minds without having to touch the person, it would make things easier.

-Wow, that bad huh?- Rocket spoke for everyone.

Discussion went back and forth for a while, Tony kept repeating himself regarding the United Nations comittee and their nosy unwelcomed involvement in the whole situation, and that told you, and everyone, exactly what you needed to know. That wasn't the reason stopping him from calling the soldier, this was personal. Personal enough that you knew this wouldn't work with wounded trust, it was a complicated matter, yes, but your patience was growing thinner with each repetitive excuse Tony threw at them.

Why don't any of them make the call?

Just then you had an idea, you looked over at Loki, as soon as he found your eyes you shot him a look that read "i have an idea, back me up", he squinted faintly at you.

-How come none of you have made the call?- you interjected, everyone looked at you and then at Tony, as if you were speaking for them all.

-Cap left Tony the only phone with the number to contact him from- Bruce spoke carefully, briefly looking at Loki as if already suspecting.

-And don't get your hopes up mind player, i don't carry it with me- Tony gestured lazily to Loki, but he wasn't the one he needed to worry about.

-Careful Stark. You know i have my ways.- Loki snarled at him.

-How? With your magic mind spear? Oh that's right, i have that too.- he smuggly shrugged at him.

Loki's lip twitched and he lifted himself off the wall to go at him, just then you stood up and stood between them, stopping Loki only two feet away from getting to Stark, one of your hands on each of their chests, you looked up at Loki, but your focus was on the man behind you.

-Okay okay, you're both very bad we get it. Let's not forget why we're all here, there's something worse we should be worrying about.- your eyes darted back to Tony as your mind swiped through the last bits of information from his.- Why don't we focus on finding out how much time we have to prepare?-

You put down your hands, satisfied with your smooth archievement, not only did you find the phone number, you knew exactly what had happened, now you understood Stark's position a bit more, and you even felt just a bit sorry to do what you were planning to do, but man was Loki right when he said these people were stubborn. 

Tony and him exchanged one last look before the conversation diverted to your suggestion, around 45 more minutes were spent gathering the timeline of Thanos' attack on the Asgardians and his daughters' knowledge on his tracking technology to figure out how much time you had to device a plan of attack, or defense, for that matter. Turns out there were 3 stones right now on Midgard, 2 that the Avengers knew of, they had lost sight of one of them but Strange had been working on a few concealing spells to bury his stone in, that would give you a bit more time, leaving you with almost two weeks to be ready.

Once that was out of the way every one agreed to reside at the compound at least until this was all over. Thor stayed back in the meeting room to settle matters about the re location of your people, although it would probably have to wait. Loki and you didn't stay, you had other things to do, you walked slowly besides each other to be out of earshot and he leaned close to you.

-Did you get it?- he said calmly.

-That and more, now all we need is a phone...- you walked a little faster.

You skimmed your eyes through a few rooms until you saw a phone sitting on a desk inside one of them, Loki followed you inside and you focused as you constructed your illusion, your magic had certain limits, you couldn't read or control someone's mind without touching them, and you couldn't conjure a partial illusion, if you needed Stark's voice, you needed to become Stark.

Checking your voice as you dialed the phone you rehearsed your words in your head, the phone rang three times before it picked up, there was silence and then a man's voice.

-Tony...- the Captain spoke.

You took a pause for a bit of dramatic effect, after all, you figured they hadn't spoke since their incident.

-Cap...- you said lowly.

-It's been a while... how's the tower?- he asked carefully, almost hesitant.

You really hoped he wasn't asking a code question because you decided to keep it short, you couldn't risk changing Stark's way of talking resulting on the Captain being suspicious.

-There's trouble- another pause-...we need you.- you whispered.

You could hear the man's slight shock through the phone, he considered the words he just heard.

-...What about Bucky? What about...everything?-

Who the hell is Bucky?

Your cunning made the connection for you, the Captain's friend, the other soldier, the Winter Soldier. That's how Stark saw him on his memories. You gulped audibly and gave him another pause.

-When can you be here?- you blurted out, hoping to sound convincing enough.

There was another long pause and for a second you worried you messed up.

-Give us two days.- he stated.

You closed your eyes in mild relief and hung up, you didn't think Stark would want to say anything else to this man. A grin of success formed on your face and you let your illusion go away to face Loki, who was waiting besides you. You flashed him a smile and a nod and he returned the smile wickedly, he liked that you were having fun.   
He placed his arm around your waist as you were about to walk past him to head out of the room, you looked up at him, a sudden grim look on his eyes, he encased your chin on his fingers, he leaned down and his lips brushed yours with a smirk as he spoke.

-Head back to our room. I'll see you there.- he commanded.

-Where are you going?- your brows furrowed, your eyes distracted by the closeness of his mouth.

His expression softened as he pulled away to look at you.  
-To get our bags...- he smiled.

-Right- you blinked, looking into his eyes.

Another wicked grin formed on his lips as he walked out of the room and into the hallway with you behind him, as the hallway split into two you went right and he went left, exchanging one last look with each other as you separated.

***

The room was rather nice, you expected a ship's quarters type of size but this was like a nice hotel, there was a dresser and a closet, a king size bed, two tall windows and a bathroom with a mirror almost the size of the bed, it was a bit maybe unnecessarily big.  
As you were taking in the size of the mirror you heard the door open and Loki came in, he placed the bag by the end of the bed and walked over to the bathroom with you.

-Hey...- you trailed off when his hands found your hair and moved it aside to sink his mouth in the crook of your neck.

His arms encompassed your waist, pressing you to his chest, in the mirror you saw his tall wide shoulders tower around your figure, his kisses moved up to nibble at your earlobe and you bit your lip.

-You were very bad today my darling...- he smiled against your skin.

-Was i?- you melted in his embrace.

-Mmhm, you tricked not one but three men- he tskd a few times.

❗️Warning: smut ahead, hair pulling, degrading and slapping❗️

He pulled your jacket off to move his mouth down once again, one of his hands slithered under your top to your breast, squeezing and massaging it with his big palm, his free hand teased the hem of your jeans, your breath hitched.

-But you also embarrassed me in front of everyone...- he pressed himself closer against you, you felt the pulsing bulge on his pants on the small of your back.- For that darling, I'm gonna have to punish you.-

His hand finally went under your jeans to rub two long fingers up and down your slit, you could feel your panties getting wet at the contact as he pressed over them. A small moan escaped your mouth when it fell agape at the sudden circles he started drawing on your clit.

-Hmm, what a bad bad girl you are...- he said, his voice like hot caramel.

You bit your lip to hold back a smile.  
-And what are you gonna do about it?-

He chuckled slowly and in a second the warmth of his contact was off of you, his hand found your hair and yanked it back, causing you to yelp, his lips pressed on your ear.

-Get undressed and bend over the counter.-

He let go of your hair and you tugged at your top, bringing it up slowly and taking it off, next you went to undo your bra, again, taking your sweet time, you looked at the mirror to see Loki watching your movements intently, when your speed didn't quicken he shot you a glare through the glass. Finally you let your bra fall off your arms to move onto your jeans, you slid them down your thighs and arched your back to give him a taunting view of your bottom, grinning to yourself when you heard him huff.  
He came back to grip at your hair and your hip, pulling your ass back against his crotch, before you could laugh mockingly his fingers moved your panties and sunk into you, you gasped and moaned, feeling him move expertly inside you.

-You think you can tease me like that without being punished you little whore?- he said through gritted teeth.

His fingers curled and rubbed your walls making you buck your hips, begging for more. You let out a needy whimper and threw your head back, his thumb shifted in position to rub at your clit, your back arching as he held you by your hair, your hands now gripping the counter.

-Fuck...please- you pouted up at him, feeling your core tingle with every swipe of his finger.

-Does the little whore want to cum?- he quickened the pace of his fingers, your walls clenching around them.

-Mmhhm- you hummed, squirming under his touch.

-Beg.-

-Aaagh, fuck, please let me cum pleasee! I'll be ahh...I'll be a good girl- you whined and panted, feeling hot as you neared your orgasm.

Another chuckle left him and his fingers pulled out, he let your hair go and your head fell forward, you groaned in protest, feeling cold and empty without him, you lifted your head to look in the mirror, your eyes were heavy and glossy, your cheeks flushed with your stolen climax, behind you, you saw Loki taking you in, your pussy probably throbbing and glistening, as he undid his pants to pull them down, when he met your eyes you were both shooting glares at each other. His hand slapped on your ass quickly, stinging the skin in surprise, you gasped lightly.

-Something you want to say darling?-

-You're an asshole- you smiled wide at him.

He growled and slapped your ass harder this time, much harder. A moan left your lips, choked up as his hand grabbed on your throat to keep you in position, he lowered his head to your face level again and looked in the mirror.

-Look. Look at how you crumble for me, how you shudder for my touch.- he caressed your hip, gripping at the skin- Look at how perfectly we fit into each other...- he whispered.

Your gaze left his in the mirror, taking in the two of you, your legs were separated and your back arched, your arms gripped at the counter for stability, your tits rising and falling with each anticipating breath, and his arm draped under one of yours, his big hand completely covering your neck holding you up for you to see, and his own body towering behind you, the black waves of his hair resting against yours, his face buried on your shoulders, nibbling at the skin. His hand shifted to move your face to his.

-You had your fun today...and now it's my turn don't you think?- he hummed.

You nodded up at him, once again his voice and his lips putting you in a trance, his hand left your hip and you felt his tip rub along your entrance, you moaned a plead to him and felt him slide in, adjusting his hips to thrust into you.

-Fuck, even as wet as you are you're still so tight...- he hissed.

His pounding quickly turned fast, your center and belly quivering with sharp tingles every time his cock came up to your cervix, you let your neck hang into his palm as you panted and gasped, your walls being stretched and filled by his cock. You looked up, the scene in front of you making your desire spike even more, your eyelids sat heavy in your eyes, your hair a mess and falling into your red sweaty face, your body shaking with Loki fucking you from behind nice and hard, his entire body was tensed up, his chest flushed and heaving with ragged breaths, his forehead pressed against your temple, you turned to catch his lips with yours, humming as he kissed you back, diving deep into your mouth with his tongue, he bit at your lower lip causing you to moan.

-You like that? You like watching yourself as daddy claims you from behind?- his voice quivered.

-Mmm yes daddy...- you whined in bliss.

-You're such a little whore aren't you? Say it.- he growled, his hand squeezed on your throat and his dick pounded harder into you.

-Aah! I'm your little whore...oh god- you whimpered, your eyes shut feeling once again your orgasm pressing around your walls.

-Open your eyes...Hmm, I want you to see yourself screaming for me.- he gripped at your jaw.

You did as you were told, determined to be a good girl for him to let you cum, he felt so good, plunging into your gut, his skin slapping on yours as he pumped you and choke you, possesing you. His grip on your hip tightened and his thrusts only became sloppier, you struggled to keep your hazy eyes opened as you moaned louder.

-Aah yes yes, oh gods just like that, fuuck!- you whined.

-You want to cum for daddy little whore?- he panted against your ear- Aaggh, beg for it darling, fuck.-

You could barely form your words, you needed to cum, and feeling how restless his thrusts had become so did he, in a daze you blurted out your words.

-Pleassee please...ooh, hmm i need to cum, please Loki!!- you screamed, the shivers on your belly sending you on edge.

His grip on your neck tightened even more, leaving you out of breath, he let out a low growl that sounded like a purr.

-Aah gods, cum for me, cum on my cock.- he hissed.

You let yourself go, shutting your eyes as you screamed for him, long whimpers and moans escaping the depths of your lungs as you unraveled around him, he bucked his hips hard into you a few times, spilling his seed deep inside you, his hand squeezing your hips hard enough to bruise, letting out a desperate moan against your jaw.

He stroked your neck gently as he chuckled and laughed, you kissed him slowly, feeling him slide out of you and turn you around. 

-Clean this up.- he said looking down at you, you went down on your knees, taking his glistening cock in your hand and running your tongue along it before taking it in your mouth.

As you sucked both your juices off his softening length, you looked up to find him looking at your work in the mirror, you hummed and pulled away from his cock with a pop. He met your eyes and his thumb ran over your bottom lip.

-Good girl.- he smirked, you couldn't help but smirk back.


	17. It’s Nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To clear things up, these guys —————*————— mean a dream.  
> And these guys **** mean some time has gone by.

—————*—————  
The air was sharp with cold, breaths coming out in thick clouds, around there was commotion, but it was hard to make out what it was about, the view hazy and blurry and ears ringing.

All of a sudden came a rush coursing through the legs and up the spine, pure adrenaline and impulse washed over, shooting forward on a sprint, and then...pain.

Sharp pain hissing at the torso, and there was a yelp, trying to find it, trying to take it off, trying to soothe something that couldn't be seen or felt at the touch, then warmth, liquid pooling warmth...blood.

Eyes welled up with tears at realization, these feelings foreign to you, as if you were an onlooker, as if one of you were living in this moment and the other was living before, because it didn't feel like there'd be an after. You heard a heartbeat, but it wasn't yours, drumming hard on your ears at a thumping pace, and a comforting numbness took place where the pain sat, there was a pull, the pull of a soul, hard and insisting, and then...

Death.

—————*—————

You woke up curled into a ball, your breathing heavy and harsh, your body so tense it hurt to relax your muscles. You shuddered as you did, sitting up in bed, to look around, the room was dark, you were at the compound. The tug of your cunning felt twisted and knotted, it hurt at the back of your neck going to your ears and up your temples, your mind cloudy with emotions you couldn't identify where they came from but they were there.

You felt overwhelmed, anxious, bottled up, you sobbed trying to catch your breath, your hand placing over your chest, feeling your pendant.

Death.

A hand squeezed your shoulder lightly and you flinched, when you turned Loki was sitting besides you, his hands up and his eyes wide with worry.

-It's me, Syg, it's me- he whispered.

You dropped against his chest, sinking your face over his collarbones, gripping at his shirt in a desperate need for him to hold you, you needed your only source of comfort, of safety, you needed him, the assurance in the warmth of his skin and his smell of home. His arms encased you in a tight hold, cradling you protectively, his fingers ran through your hair and you sobbed once again, letting the tears from the unknown feelings you didn't seem to own spill on his shoulders.

-Shh, you're alright. I'm here, I'm here...- he spoke softly, a hint of concern on his voice.

It took a few minutes for you to finally relax, his fingers still running through your hair, he kissed the top of your head, your arms wrapped around his chest and you inhaled his scent again, every bit of him helping you calm down more and more.

-A dreadful nightmare wasn't it?- he said against your hair.

You nodded

-Was it the past, the present, or the future?- 

You thought about it, your senses still too shaken to recall everything right.

-I don't know...- you mumbled against his chest.

-That's okay...- he said calmly.

You heard his heartbeat, slow and steady, same as always, you concentrated on it.

-Do you want to go back to sleep?-

There was a pause. You nodded.

He whispered an okay as he lowered you with him back on the mattress, your head sinking in the pillow but your face resting on the crook of his neck, he pulled the covers over the two of you and you realized how cold your arms were, he shifted a little making himself comfortable, his lips pressed on your temple.

-Loki...- you said, your voice gruff with emotion.

-Yes my dear?-

-Will you kiss my eyes?- you said slowly.

He took a moment, recognizing how bad the nightmare had been for you to ask him to do that, but he cupped your cheek, caressing it with his thumb, and you felt his lips very gently over one of your eyelids, then to the other, and you sighed in relief. He lingered over you for a moment before laying another delicate kiss on your lips.  
His arm went under yours, pulling you closer, you draped your arm on his shoulder and into his soft hair, it took a while before you finally closed your eyes and resumed your rest.

****

You woke up without opening your eyes, feeling them buried against Loki's neck with the rest of your face, you were tightly leaned against him, relief came knowing that you didn't experience any other nightmare, the kiss on the eyes always worked. In reality you were the one to share it with Loki, your grandmother used to kiss your mom over her eyelids whenever she had a nightmare, telling her that it shooed the nightmares away, and your mother did it you; it's no surprise that Loki started experiencing nightmares as soon as he discovered his heritage, and one night, although he looked at you like you were insane, he let you kiss his eyelids, and that night he didn't have another nightmare. And sometimes he'd do it for you.

Sometimes though, sometimes it wasn't nightmares. You always had the cunning, all your life, it grew stronger as you did, but when you started exercising your magic, you became aware that you'd also have visions, they were never too clear, they always felt foreign to you, as if you had jumped into a memory that wasn't yours, they weren't always bad, but they weren't always good.

But they were never about death.

You slowly opened your eyes, looking down at Loki's chest, the pendant's chain disappearing under his shirt, you thought about the vision, everything you heard, felt and saw; it wasn't much, but at the same time it was too much. Death. Your cunning had whispered it to you, you knew with battle came the possibility of losing people, but this was a confirmation, a signed reminder that it would happen. But it left you uneasy...why would your cunning remind you of something you already know?

You took a deep breath, taking in the scent of leather and home, you felt his fingers run through your hair and your lips planted a small kiss on his neck.

-Good morning...- he said, he didn't sound sleepy at all.

-Morning...were you up?-

He hummed in response.  
-I didn't want to wake you up-

-You could've gotten up slowly?- you suggested.

He chuckled softly.  
-I disagree...- he trailed off.

Just then you shifted to look down at his body, only to find it in a tight hold, your arms hugged his chest and waist, your leg wasn't only draped over his but tangled around it. 

-Oh...- you said knowingly, slowly unlocking your leg from his, you mumbled a 'sorry', laying on your back, but he didn't move much, just kissed your forehead.

-I didn't say i wanted to get up- he smirked at you. You both looked at each other, him on his side and you on your back, close to him.

-Do you want to tell me about the dream?- he said, his mouth in a stern line.

-...Future- you started, answering his question from last night, you licked your lips- Unclear, as always...-

-What did you feel?- his hand was under the pillow, his eyes attentive.

-Pain...-you recalled, gulping- Blood...and...and death- you whispered.

His brows were relaxed, but in his eyes you could see him go through every possibility, thinking, questioning. Meanwhile you tried to not relive it, even if it was puzzling to you how you could feel so strongly about something that not only you were prepared for but you had lived through before; war, fights, conflict, killing.

-What do you think it means?-

You looked down, shaking your head slightly.

-I don't know, it's better to just leave it alone. There's no stopping these things.- you stated.

And you were right, your visions always came true, one way or another, it was no use to overthink their meaning or mourn about what they might take. Even if the knot on your throat told you otherwise.

Loki stared at you in silence while you shifted your gaze at the ceiling, after a minute or so you felt his hand on your torso, he slowly dragged it down to your lower belly, lifting your top and resting his open palm on your warm skin, his hand almost covering the entire area due to its size. On your peripheral you saw he was staring down, you turned your head and found him staring at where his hand laid, one eyebrow barely raised, he seemed to have zoned out, as if he were looking for something on your belly.

-What?- you whispered, smirking at his concentration.

He snapped back and breathed in as he looked at you, he opened his mouth, like he wanted to say something, but instead he returned your smirk.

-Nothing...- he said softly.

You squinted at him.  
-Liar- you smiled.

-I get that a lot...- his smirk got bigger.

You rolled your eyes and sat up, lifting your leg to straddle him, he only looked up at you, his hand still on your lower belly as you sat straight over his hips. You kept your silence, hoping to induce a need in him to fill it and tell you what he wanted to say, but he was the trickster one, he wasn't breaking. When he saw you had gone silent his eyes once again wandered, he blinked slowly, his thumb now stroking under your belly button, but not in a sexual way.

-What is it??- you insisted, raising your brows.

-Nothing.- he also raised his brows at you.

-If there's something you want to sa...-

He cut you off by sitting up and throwing himself over you, your back hit the mattress as he sat up and leaned to hover above you, leaving your legs around his hips, his face close to yours.

-I said it's nothing.- he warned you cocking a brow.

You held his gaze for a bit, wondering what he could possibly be thinking about, then again it was probably about the vision. But you didn't want to think about it, the knot in your stomach tightening at the thought, a growl came from that spot. Maybe you were just hungry.

-Should we find you something to eat?- he chuckled softly and placed a kiss right below your sternum.

You both got up and ready, now that it had gotten your attention, you realized just how hungry you were. It didn't take you very long to find a common area with a kitchen, you just looked around for a while, until you heard casual mumbling and followed it, finding Thor, Brunnhilde and a few of the Guardians, one of whom was extremely focused on an arm wrestling match with Thor, his face beet red and a vein about to pop on his forehead.

-Quill you're about to pass out will you stop it?- one of Thanos' daughters spoke in a frustrated tone.

-What are you talking about?? I'm...perfectly...fffine- he struggled through the words.

-No he's not- another one of the Guardians whispered on the daughter's ear.

-Yes i am!!- he yelled, but that got the last of his strength and Thor easily slammed his arm on the table, chuckling.

Silence seemed to fall into the room as everyone turned to see you and Loki when you giggled to yourself. Loki cleared his throat, you stepped forward into the kitchen as soon as you saw the pot of coffee and the toasted bread. Quill demanded a rematch, insisting on how he had gotten distracted by the creature who, as you introduced yourself to them, had called herself Mantis, the daughter's name was Gamora, and the tall wide species laughing at Quill on the other side of the room was Drax. You leaned against the counter besides Brunnhilde as you bit into the jam coated bread and handed Loki a mug of coffee.

-How long have they been doing this?- you mumbled to her.

-Since they met...- she sighed.

-They're as childish as it gets.- Loki stated.

The Valkyrie chuckled at his remark, raising her brows.  
-Wouldn't you know Lackey?-

You turned to Loki and his jaw clenched, he didn't like nicknames, you knew that much, you called him Lokes for a while just to spite him during training and have him go harder on you. You could tell he liked this one even less, most probably because it wasn't a nickname, it was more like mockery.

-Yeah Lackey- you joined- You're not far behind aren't you?-

You had no idea what you were backing up Brunnhilde in, but you didn't care, you were having fun. Loki drank from his mug, trying his best to seem contained. A giggle bounced out of your smile and you leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, he glared at you, he knew you were just teasing. You made some small talk with the Valkyrie while Thor and the Guardians argued about you didn't care what.

-So Loki has a wife huh? Are you Asgardian?- she eyed you curiously.

You chuckled.  
-Very...- 

-I imagine you know your way around fighting then?-

You couldn't help but feel a tinge of excitement at where this was going, you smiled at her.

-I do, never had the pleasure to fight a Valkyrie though, unlike my dear husband.- you reached to pat his bicep and heard him scoff.

-Well i sure hope you're better than him...How about we go a round later? See how you do- she crossed her arms.

Your smile grew bigger, slightly starstruck at the proposition, but you agreed almost immediately, when Brunnhilde took off telling you to meet her in 15 minutes, you turned to Loki who had a devil's smirk on his lips.

-What?- 

-Oh nothing...- he said in a low voice.

-That's getting very annoying you know?- you drank from your mug.

Fifteen minutes later there you were, tying your hair up in a ponytail at the nearest training room, there really weren't many weapons at your disposition, so you opted to bring a few of your knives and daggers, and if the situation allowed it, you could always manifest your Dragonfang. Loki had let you know she lost hers on the battle against Hela, so you thought bringing it in would be a bit disrespectful, aside from the fact that you're a non-Valkyrie holding a Valkyrie's sword.  
Loki stood outside the glass doors, that devilish smirk still on his face, and Thor stood next to him, he too was curious about your skills. Brunnhilde, who insisted you called her Brunn, walked in a minute later, adjusting the grip pads on her hands.

-Thor tells me you fought against that wizard, Strange...-

-I did, he was fun- you grinned.

-Well this isn't magic, let's see if you're just as good...- she unbuckled a sword from her hip.

Reaching for the two daggers on your hips you twirled one around your wrist, giving her a nod to signal your were ready. She started pacing towards you, at first it was friendly, almost like a game, she swung the sword at you and you blocked and dodged to side, when she came again you slid your dagger across it, pushing it to your right making it slide away from you.  
It all turned a bit more agressive once you fell first in an attempt to dodge three very fast twirls of her sword and a kick at your kneecap, which you couldn't miss. You fell with a grunt, but got up quickly.

Now you attacked first, flinging your dagger across, she stood her sword up, you were hoping she'd do that, and you locket your other dagger in between and pushed up hard, making her grip on the sword weaken, it fell from her hands and landed at your feet, you kicked it away, hearing it clash against the wall.

Brunn was faster with her fists than she was with the weapon, throwing punches and blocks at you, grunts and sharp breaths were drawn by you both and sweat formed on your back and forehead. She turned quickly shooting her leg up and at you and you ducked, as you got up you threw your dagger up in the air to change its position and lunged at her thigh with it, not only did she dodge it but she planted an elbow at your cheek and you bit the corner of your mouth, piercing through it, groaning at the pain as you let one of your daggers fall. You felt the warm taste of iron as you run your tongue over.

You drew heavy breaths and patted your finger, looking at the amount of blood, you raised a brow at her.

Jokes on you, I'm into this shit. 

You thought and heard Loki chuckling in the distance, your cunning buzzed with connection, he heard you, and he remembered your turn ons. But at that moment it sounded like teasing, and you shot a glare at him before you dropped your other dagger and licked your lip again. The next few moves were fast, you both blocked punches and ducked and roll to avoid kicks, with your speed grew your agression, and at one point point yells and groan were heard after the punches, she shot her fist your way and you locked your arm around her and struck your knee up, then swung your leg under hers and made her fall.

She had a look of shock and frustration on her as you straddled her hips, but she didn't fight back, at least not until she gathered strength and jumped up with her legs, carrying her weight up with yours as your grip trembled and you fell hitting your head against the wall, she reached for the sword that you had kicked moments ago and before you could think you manifested your mother's sword and held it upside down against your forearm, blocking her hit.

The Valkyrie looked at you before quickly switching to the hypnotizing blade, her expression softened, it drew realization, shock and confusion. She stood up straight.

-I thought we said no magic.- she stated, her eyes now on yours, searching for a trick.

You slowly stood up, still holding the sword, you turned to the glass windows to see Thor right against it with his mouth hanging open.

-It's not a trick...- you breathed hard.- It's okay, it was given to me-

The weapon shone elegantly under the white lighting of the room, you extended it to her, and she took it, admiring it the same way you do. She turned to face you again and gave you a nod and a small sincere smile, handing the Dragonfang back to you. You thought for a moment, she seemed to like you, even start to trust you.

-You're good, definitely better than Loki- she mumbled the last part.

-Well...he learned from me- you chuckled.- It was truly an honor-

She laughed.  
-The honor was mine- 

You secured the daggers on your hips and she clasped her sword back, before you both walked out you took another glance at the sword.

-My mother was a Valkyrie, you know?- you cocked a brow.

-Oh, im sorry...-she realized.

-It's fine...- you shook your head.

-What was her name?-

It brought you memories, being around a Valkyrie, using her sword, you didn't remember too much about your mother, but according to your dad you had gotten your potential from her, she taught you how to fight, back then her sword way too heavy for your grip. She was a fierce woman, but a wise fighter.  
You smiled softly, remembering her own smile.

-Marwa...- you said softly- Her name was Marwa...-


	18. Warmth, Cold And An Unspoken Thought

-You're an agile warrior Sygin- Thor nodded as you walked out of the training room.

You offered him a smile but hissed at the sudden pain from your bite, Loki came to stand besides you and lifted your chin up with his thumb and index finger, you watched his eyes stare intensely at your lips, his pupils dilated. He blinked a few times and drew in a sharp breath.

-It'll bleed for a while...- he pointed out.

He had a hungry look on his eyes that you couldn't wait to see more of, and you left your wound alone to let it bleed.  
You broke Loki's gaze to acknowledge Thor's compliment and thank him, promising him that he was next.

-Now that's something I'd like to see.- Loki grinned.

-Of course you would...- you rolled your eyes.- Brunn, thank you again, it was rather fun- 

-Any time...-

She smiled and you were off with Loki by your side, walking in comfortable but heavy silence to your room. He stepped in before you and closed the door slowly, you walked halfway through the room before turning to find him looking at you with the same hunger filled eyes. You held this gaze for what felt like minutes as he walked closer to you.

-You're good with the daggers...- he started.

-Not as good as you, you were always a natural...- 

You felt your bite bleeding inside your mouth, you opened it slightly to run your tongue over it, making sure Loki got a good view of the blood on your tongue, his lip twitched.

-It's because I'm fast.- he raised a cocky brow.

Both of your breathings were deep and slow as you stared heavily at each other, the air around you thick and tensing with each passing second you both fought not to lunge at each other, wanting to drive the other one crazy. You shrugged with one shoulder.

-You're not that fast...- you teased him.

He tilted his head and in a second shot his arm forward to grab at your wrist, you blocked him quickly with your palm and directed a hit with your free hand at his neck, he dodged and pulled you forward from your forearm until you hit his chest in a fast swift move, his arm went around your waist moments later, but before he could trap your lips on his you pulled out one of the daggers and placed it under his jaw, his chest rising and falling with adrenaline, or lust, judging by the bulge pulsating on your leg.

You studied his face, your own desire shivering around your skin, your eyes traveled down to the straight line of his jaw and you bit your lip, pulling away from him.

-I need a shower...- you said turning your back on him to walk to the bathroom.

The pony tail was down when you stepped in and so was your top, you slid of off your pants and underwear, letting all the items fall on the floor as you turned on the water, hot enough to burn. You relaxed as you stepped under the shower, closing your eyes as the water drenched you.

Soon enough you heard the rustling of Loki's clothes falling on the floor and he stepped inside with you, the shower head was wide enough that you both fit under it, his hand gripped at your waist as he reached for the shampoo bottle, lathering some on his hands and spreading it on your scalp, he sunk his fingers on your head and started massaging, you leaned into his touch, your back touching his chest, you hummed as he washed your hair.

Your scalp was left buzzing from his touch as he pulled away, signaling you to rinse the product off, now you turned around to face him, he was shamelessly looking down at you, his hair now wet falling on his forehead and shoulders, you could tell he was too busy taking you in so you ran conditioner through the ends of your hair.

-Hey- you grinned up at him.

His gaze came up to rest at your lips before meeting your eyes, his pupils so dilated they outshined the blue around them. You didn't need to look down to know he was hard, his arm wrapped around your torso and pulled you closer, your hands found his wide chest and stroked delicate patterns as your lips parted looking up at him, he finally came down to catch them on his and his hand held you by your neck.

You felt his tongue slide in followed by his teeth, biting right over your wound, you meant to groan but instead you moaned, your core already starting to tingle at the feeling of his mouth tasting your blood.

He pulled away when you felt a small drop gather and fall over your bottom lip, he ran his thumb over it, collecting the drop and pressing to gather more of the dark liquid, you opened your mouth, leaning forward to suck on his thumb, but he tskd at you. Instead he smeared a red trail over your neck, then leaned forward to suck and lick at the skin, your eyes rolled back on your skull at the feeling of him sucking at your blood.

-Hmm...it's been so long since I've tasted you, i forgot how sweet you were.- he growled on your neck.

You felt your body already going limp under the soft touch of his fingers and his lips, his hot breath and the feeling of his tone sending shivers through your skin even under the hot water. Your hands draped down his chest, wanting to make him tremble as much as you already were, he pulled you closer, urging you to go on when you reached the hard length of his cock, you stroked up and down slowly feeling him twitch when you teased at the head.

The hand that was at your waist came up to palm on your breast, pinching and twisting at the nipple, you whined at the feeling, his mouth now nibbling at your earlobe, letting out small grunts as you felt him leak with precum.  
He pushed you against the wall, you hissed at the unexpected contact with the cold tile, you mewled at the contrast of temperatures, the tiles making your back harsh with cold and his towering pale figure on a duet with his mouth at your skin, making you hot at your cheeks and down your pussy.

-Loki...- you whispered, you didn't know if it was need or mere praising.

His hand never left your throat, his fingers cupping the back of your neck and tangling in your wet hair, holding you like a purring kitten asking for his touch, and you felt like such. The hand that kneaded your breast quickly fell and wrapped under the back of your knee, lifting your thigh, your pussy now at an easy access for his cock. You felt a shiver go down your neck when he lifted his head from it, the skin sensitive and buzzing but already missing his lips, which gifted you with forming bruises down to your shoulder.

-I'm not that fast?- he looked down at you.- I'll give you fast.-

Before you could utter another word his hand squeezed at your throat, leaving your words to get chocked at your windpipe, he held your thigh up with his elbow and jerked himself a few times before lining his head at your entrance. Your walls wrapped his dick, swallowing it up when he bucked his hips up, his arm on your thigh and his hand on your throat holding you at his mercy and for his pleasure, and you welcomed him in, wanting to feel his dick twitch inside your wet cunt. His pace was quick and steady at first, you mouth hanging open at the feeling of his thighs crashing up at yours, moans and cries left your mouth, but you couldn't utter a word with the pressure around your neck.

-Gods i love the way you squirm under me, so perfect...- he mumbled, his eyes glossy and greedy.

The sound that struggled out your lips was a pathetic attempt at a moan, coming out as a mix of a cry and a whine, you flustered at the smirk that drew on his face when he heard you, and his thrusts became impossibly faster, your eyes shut close, the lack of air and the pounding of his length at your cervix making your head fall back, dizzy and overwhelmed with the tingling at your belly, your orgasm already waiting to unveil.

-Fucking look at me.- he snarled, your eyelids barely fluttered- Look at me or I'll stop.-

With an inhumane effort you opened your eyes up to look at him, his raven wet strands fell over his face, some sticking to his forehead and jaw, he was panting and his eyes were also heavy, struggling to keep it together.

-You're so fucking tight...You want to cum already don't you?- his breaths shallow.

-Ahuh- was all you could blurt through his hold, the heat in your belly rising, waiting to be let go.

-Cum for me, be a good little slut.- he whispered, looking down at your swollen lips.

Your brow pinched upwards as his words trembled right down to your core, sending you over the edge to your climax, you cried and screamed at his never ceasing pace and clenched tightly around his dick, he plunged hard into you a couple of times, spiking your orgasm two times harder, but he didn't cum, instead he slipped out and came to whisper into your ear.

-Kneel.-

A smile creeped at your mouth and you bit your lip, his hungry tone sending a chill down your spine, you lowered yourself on your knees and looked at his cock, hard, pink and glistening with your own juices, you didn't waste time, mouth watering at the thought of pleasuring him, you took him into your mouth, sucking at the head and going down slowly, your head bobbing as you made your way to the base, tasting yourself over his skin. He grunted and moaned as you hollowed your cheeks, taking all of him, taking him deep and feeling his tip at the back of your throat, his hand came to rest under your jaw, wanting to feel how much your throat was stretching for him.

He then gathered your hair, keeping your head in place as you breathed through your nose, trying not to gag, you failed and he yanked your head back, your lips parted and your tongue almost sticking out, gasping for air, but already wanting to get your lips around his cock yet again, you looked up at him as he admired your face.

-Open- 

You opened your mouth further and he spat down into it, you swallowed instinctively.

-So eager and obliging, that pretty mouth of yours.- he murmured, his grip on your hair tightened- I'm gonna plunge my cock inside of it, and I'm going to fuck your face. Then I'm going to shoot all of my hot cum down your throat, and you are going to swallow every drop of it like the good sweet girl you are.-

Your breaths hitched in anticipation, you felt the remains of your first orgasm being pushed over by the wetness that his words induced into you, you lived for the power he held onto you. His hand left your hair to cup the back of your neck and you prepared yourself, leaning forward to run your tongue under the base of his dick, licking at a drop of hot precum, giving him the green light to go on.

A sharp huff went out his nose and he bucked his hips forward, sliding into your mouth and instantly touching the back of your throat, he repeated the action smoothly a couple of times, relishing at the feeling of your tongue under his shaft, closing his eyes. His palm rested against the tile to give him support as he swayed his hips faster into your mouth, you felt him push further and further down, your jaw unhinged to give him all the access he wanted, your nose hitting his lower abdomen every time he thrusted in, spit drooled down your chin that you couldn't held back, the size of him taking up your whole mouth and extending down your throat making it burn, you heard his grunts and moans, he held your head in place as he fucked into it.

-Aaagghh, gods yes...yes, take me deep, good girl...- 

His moans and grunts made your core tingle in heat, you sneaked your hand down in between your folds and started making fast circles on your begging clit, your eyes shut at the stimulation and pushed down the prickling tears as Loki quickened his pace, growing sloppy, building up his release. You gripped at his thigh to gain a little more support, your legs bent and spread as you rubbed at your clit, feeling your second orgasm close, tears filled your eyes at his cock pumping into your mouth, rubbing against your small wound making it sting.

The muscle on his thigh clenched under your hand and you knew he was about to cum, you worked harder at your clit, moving your hips against your fingers, your own thighs shaking at your upcoming high, Loki moaned and cursed, and his dick pounded at your mouth so hard you thought your jaw might snap, another string of moans came and you mimicked him as your fingers rubbed furiously on your clit, your belly spasming as your second climax overcame you, so strong you forgot about the dick pumping your mouth for a second before you felt it twitch and Loki's hold on your hair tightened, his cum squirting down your throat in long shots of warm liquid, your eyes tried to find his face as best as they could, you could see his eyes shut and his mouth wide open, his eyebrows scrunched in pleasure as you sucked him clean.

He helped you stand, you almost lost the fight against your wobbly legs, but he held you, helped you finish getting cleaned up and kissed you once more chuckling and laughing under the now growing cold shower, when you were done you practically sprinted back to bed. It was only midday but between the fight and the sex your body was limp and asking for a break.

Loki came to sit at the edge of the bed, besides you, you crawled and turned around, resting your head and shoulders on his legs as you went under his arm, which cupped your face and softly stroked your jaw and up your cheek. You saw him examine the area down your neck.

-I'm okay...- you told him, your voice slightly gruff from the intrusion at your throat.

-Hmm-

Loki's POV:

He was looking at her like he had looked at her belly this morning, when he had gone so deep into wonder of something he never excepted he would think about.  
This time he wasn't zoning out, he was deep in concentration, taking in the softness of her cheek as he stroked it, her swollen lips, the way she looked like a delicate petal that had drifted in the breeze and landed on his palm.

She looked rather...cute. Though he hated that word.

She giggled shortly and his cold scarred heart seemed to flutter, like she could only make him feel this warmth he didn't consider himself worthy of.

-What is it? Don't. Say. Nothing.- she smirked.

But this time he wasn't scared of expressing his thoughts, not like he was this morning, when his palm rested over her belly and he asked himself what it would look like if there were a bump where his palm laid.

-I'm thinking you're the most beautiful creature i have ever laid eyes on...- he said, pushing his thoughts away.

She flashed him a smile that could lighten the darkest soul.


	19. You’re Not Strong Enough

Loki's POV:

Sygin's plan had worked effectively. Two days after calling the soldier the commotion around the compound gave way to the news that an unwelcome visitor, or visitors, had arrived. He knew sooner or later these people will grow tired of the pair meddling in their business, specially his wife, since apparently she was the only one who could put them in their place, and he smirked to himself.

Now that was worth a look.

He thought as they approached the meeting room where loud exclamations and arguments could already be heard from the petty mortals inside.

-It was you on the phone, you asked me to come Tony.- 

-I'm telling you, i didn't call, so you can be on your way Captain.-

They both walked in with an air that exuded indifference and calmness with a hint of smugness on his part, there's nothing like knowing your enemies are about to get their attitudes corrected by your small exasperated wife.

-He didn't call, i did...- she interrupted, a blank but relaxed expression on her face.

The Avengers turned their heads, just now realizing the two of them had walked in, now this was more like he remembered, only the 6 individuals he had fought, and the Colonel, stood in this room, their expressions confused and calculating, he caught a glimpse of the Captain and the Black Widow eyeing him and then her, staring for a bit too long, his eye twitched, he was ready to slice throats when Sygin spoke.

-You must be the soldier,- she leaned over to him and lowered her voice- I thought he'd be a bit more...flashy?- 

His smirk grew, still looking forward at the tall blonde man. Speaking of, his brother stood from his chair.

-Captain, this is Sygin she is...well she's my brother's wife...- 

-Loki's married?- the soldier's brows furrowed.

It wasn't the surprised look on people's faces when they found out he was married that bothered him, sometimes he couldn't even believe it himself, it was the thoughts he knew went through their heads when they found out.

"Why would anyone marry him?" 

"He must have forced her, she can't really love him"

-Well...congratulations.- the Black Widow finally spoke, directing a knowing look at him, as if she had won a bet.

-Thank you, now-she turned to Stark- I called the Captain, because you were being hesitant...and we cannot afford that Mr. Stark...-

-But the voice on the phone was Tony's.-

Loki was standing behind her but he could still see how hard she rolled her eyes from the movement of her head, in a second she shifted into Stark's form.

-Yes, it was.- her now masculine voice said, and she shifted back to herself.

-....Okay first of all, I'm taller than that. And secondly, how did you get the number?- the man spoke in false confidence.

-You people just continue to underestimate me for standing next to a threat that is no longer active- she lazily gestured to him- And ironically that is very similar to what you're doing, or better said, not doing, to stop Thanos. He is tracking the stones right now if he hasn't done it already and is on his way here, the fate of your world and everyone's is at risk and you people are stranded, being held back by inferior authorities, on a petty feud truly distinctive of you mortals.-

-Okay no, you just got here, alright? You don't get to tell us if what we're doing is wrong or right. Thank you for getting Ross out of my back, that was nice yes but this is different!- Stark's tone ran low on patience and stability.

-Well it wouldn't have been like that if we would've all stayed together, would it?- the Captain calmly directed the question over to Stark, who still had his eyes over Sygin.

-He's right you know?- she cocked a brow at him, Stark turned to look at the man.

-You wanted to go around fighting without any care or consequence like that wouldn't bring us any more trouble than we already were up against. I wanted to protect us, all of us, i wanted to commit to our duty without having to carry the weight of the body count we were leaving behind.-

-You wanted us to become no more than weapons, to surrender our right to be free and...- 

-He's not wrong either.- Sygin interrupted.

The two man, deep in discussion, snapped their heads in her direction once again, Stark's expression was of stress and desperation, and the Captain always carried that nauseous hopeful glare on his brows, and the empathetic quirk on his mouth that made Loki's eyes roll.

-You are both incredibly wrong and right at the same time...-

Before she could continue, Stark let out one his signature commentaries.

-Then by all means, enlighten us, since you seem to know so much more about Earth politics than us.-

Loki felt Sygin consider their request, half of him wanted her to lash out, maybe even throw them out the window, the other half of him wanted to be the one to throw them out. She drew in a sharp breath, apparently she was considering it too.

-I would've signed those...accords you speak of.- she stated.

Stark made a motion with his hands that lingered between "Thank you" and "Told you so", she continued.

-...And I would've waited until they needed you enough to break them.-

Loki smirked looking at her, he lost count of how many confused glares had been thrown her way by now, but they just kept coming.

-"Earth's mightiest heroes" aren't you? Sign the accords if they need you so badly. One day, they'll beg at your feet to take action against their own rules. If you can't beat them, join them, and beat them from the inside. The fact that you all went ahead and split up easily shows you were never a team, that you don't work together.- she stated, walking closer to the two men

\- But that's not it isn't it? This isn't about politics, it stopped being about a team, it turned personal.-

The air turned thick around the room, Stark and the soldier diverted their gaze to anywhere but each other or her, and past them, their companions sighed and crossed their arms, exchanging a few leaden looks.

-Look around you, this disagreement stopped being about the Avengers, they don't care how you all stay together, and if you really are a team, then it doesn't matter...Stark- the man lifted his eyes to look at her- Resentment is venom, it's a parasite. I'm not saying forgive him and move on, I'm saying, you want to protect the Earth don't you? I've seen it...and Captain- she shifted her weight- I don't know you, but judging by Loki's description i'd say you'd do almost anything for the greater good now wouldn't you?-

They thought and considered, but the ambient seemed to have gotten lighter in a way. The conflicted men looked at each other in silent agreement, Sygin leaned her palms against the table and her tone came out more serious, but quiet.

-This enemy we now have in common, he's too strong and too determined, he'll go to lengths you can't imagine to achieve his goal- Loki's gaze dropped to the floor- And he's about to become more powerful, if he succeeds, millions if not billions of lives will be lost and your planet will be reduced to ashes. So maybe try to put this whole brainwashed boyfriend thing aside, for just one last battle, for the universe's sake...-

-He's uh...he, he's not my boyfriend...- the soldier stuttered.

As if they were connected, Loki and Sygin's brows pinched instantly in disbelief.

-You turned your back on 117 countries for a friend??- Sygin squinted at him.

The Black Widow tried, and failed, to hold back a smirk, the Captain shifted uncomfortably on his spot. There was a pause.

A defeated laugh in the form of a wince, coming from Stark, shaking his head slowly. Sygin caught the action, and stood up straight again.

-Trust...isn't something you rebuild in a day...- he said, looking at her.

She breathed in, and took a moment. Loki couldn't possibly foreseen what she'd say next.

-Loki's father murdered my family in cold blood...-

-Syg.- Loki interjected, but she raised a dismissive hand and his eyes widened, baffled.

-I loathed him and his family for it, i never forgave him. And still here i am, i trust Loki, the son of my family's murderer, with my life every day. I understand more than you think Tony...-

Once again the air was thick and heavy, or maybe Loki's air in his chest felt like so at the sudden revelation of their past that she decided to make, it took him more than he liked to bring back up his mask of indifference, and his gaze traveled to his brother, who was as baffled and astonished as he had been, apparently his father's crimes would never stop being a shock to his brother, who could blame him? Thor was as naive as they came sometimes.

Stark also seemed slightly taken by surprise, but also a tad relieved, and he swallowed.

-Tony...- came Agent Romanoff's voice- You don't have to welcome us with open arms, but we do need to be together in this. If you don't trust us, then trust that we trust you.-

Sygin crossed her arms and looked at her approvingly.

-Alright...- Stark finally sighed, fidgeting nervously.  
He exchanged a look with the Captain, who nodded at him.

***

Now the crowd in the room had increased in number, and different files where scattered around the table and up in holograms as the different groups of individuals gathered information, Loki stood against a wall in the far end of the room, a spot good enough to try and hold his banter down and un tighten the knot on his stomach after she so carelessly had spoken a part of the past a tad too private for his liking.

On a more positive note he was satisfied that their time invested in getting the Captain to come back and Stark to swallow his pride and settle down hadn't been for nothing, apparently the soldier had some seemingly well armed contacts. Though he wished Sygin would've stayed in a more reserved technique of work. Especially taking in consideration the information they were about to share.

-The Space Stone used to be held within the Tesseract, it's particular element gave it control over the plane of space, and allowed who wielded it to teleport anywhere in the Universe, and, like all of the other stones, it's energy is unlimited and unmatched.-

Loki described trying to transmit the level of danger and power these stones held, even if he knew this Infinity Stone he was speaking in past tense of was sitting in his methaporical pocket, he hoped these people wouldn't be as hard headed as he knew them to be, and understand that even without on stone, it could be the end of their if not many other worlds. But of course, he overestimated his brother.

-We don't need to worry about this Stone, all i think we need to know is it gave us great advantage by getting destroyed- Thor turned to look around the room- You're welcome...- he said, a bit too proudly.

-It might have been our doom if it still were here...- Sygin sung in a faint fake relief, Loki knew the comment was a petty shot straight at him, his eye twitched.

-I think you're forgetting brother...this isn't only about the stones, it's about he who seeks them.- he stated.

-He's right. Thanos is dangerous enough without the stones in his possesion.- the daughter spoke in a clear stern tone that hid worry.

-Loki, Sygin, you guys rubbed shoulders with the guy, what can you tell us?- Stark spoke, a pair of glasses hanging low on his nose.

-They were mere prisoners of my father, locked up in a dark cell...- the daughter dismissed.

Loki drew in a sharp breath, he didn't need to look at his brother to know his eyes expressed concern, maybe even pity, he didn't want his pity, he wasn't weak.

Sygin scoffed.

-Tell that to my back.- 

-That's enough.- he snapped at her, low but firm, and she glared at him.

The subject brought pain and blood in the shape of memories to the front of Loki's mind, of some of his weakest moments, of the pain he had not only endured but caused to the woman glaring at him. Flashes of tears and screams came following, he could still hear them, he could still feel and see the pain on her beautiful eyes as the vemon rippled through the soft skin he knew and cherished while he cowardly sat besides her and let Thanos have his way with both of them, while she sacrificied her own sanity to keep him alive, only for him to turn his back on her and be consumed by empty promises of power. He could've lost her, even if he knew a part of him did it to save her, to protect her, a part of him buried deep under the manipulation and mind control, a part of him that functioned unconsciously.

He could hear speaking around the room, planning and organizing turned into buzzing and mumbling sound under his thoughts, she took part on it, giving her insight and suggesting different strategies. If he found her, what would he do to her this time? Would he be able to protect her?

No. You're not strong enough.

Came his own, dark guttural voice inside his head, assuring him of his fears. He clenched his jaw, he couldn't lose her, he couldn't make her suffer for him again, he'd bleed out dry before he let Thanos harm her like that again. 

This time, this time he'll do anything to keep her safe.


	20. Hidden Worries

Your POV:

Thankfully you had managed to calm down yet another group of grumpy mortals, now the planning was in session and you had made progress, and for that you were satisfied.

Now what occupied your mind was your very uneasy feeling husband walking besides you. When Loki was mad, which was more often than not, sometimes at you sometimes at the rest of the world, it was something that you could just feel around you, like a presence emanating from him, even before the bond you could sense it. 

You knew what was wrong, he didn't like that you opened up a bit too much with the Avengers, but if these people didn't trust you, then your lives were at risk, what Loki didn't want was to seem vulnerable, but what he never understands is that you can be vulnerable and still slice a sword through someone's throat if you wanted to.

As soon as you both walked through the door, there were two ways this thing could go. Sex or arguing.

-Have you lost all sense of respect?- he shot.

Arguing it is.

-Excuse me?-

-Have you no respect for me? For our privacy? Or did you feel that if they felt sorry for you maybe they wouldn't put us in a cell?-

His tone was accusing and snarling, his fists were balled up at his sides and his eyes were angry, your eyes in return were baffled, but grew in anger with every one of his words.

-I felt that they needed to trust us in order for this to actually work. On the contrary of what you like to think, we can't do this alone, we need help, we need to be an army, a team, we can't go into a battlefield were one of the sides is simultaneously against each other!- you gestured with your arm.

-Always you and your bloody trust. Help isn't trust, we need their strength to fight, but they can't keep us alive if the situation arose to it!- 

-Loki not one of us can protect the other against Thanos, not if we're caught up in conflict.-

His jaw clenched tightly, his breaths hisses coming out his nose.

-You think i can't protect you?-

-No that is not what i said.- you tilted your head.

You saw his eyes get darker, his knuckles white with pressure, his eyes were on you, but he wasn't looking at you, his vision unfocused. You hadn't seen this Loki in a while.

-I can protect you.-

You softened your tone.  
-I know...-

He seemed to be coming back, his gaze back on you, his lips still a thin line.

-You'll be in the back outpost. Attacking from the distance.-

-What?- you said, confused.

-Your attacks are good from a distance, and you'll be safer there, if he doesn't see you he'll just focus on me, he won't know you're there.-

-Loki that is miles away from where you'll be- you squinted, not understanding his logic.

The soul bond would just weaken them at such distance, it would backfire on them, and they wouldn't be there to cover each other's backs.

-Exactly. You won't be in the fight. You'll be protected, your magic will be stronger...-

-Loki you're not making this decision for me.-

-YES I AM.- he snapped- We need strength! We need our forces to be clean and impenetrable!-

-No! We need to be together! The bond...- 

-You're NOT LISTENING TO ME!-

-YOU'RE NOT MAKING ANY SENSE!- your eyes widened.

-WHY CAN YOU NOT JUST LISTEN TO ME?!-

-BECAUSE YOU'D BE RISKING OUR LIVES! THATS NOT HOW THE BOND WORKS AND YOU KNOW IT!-

-I DON'T GIVE A DAMN HOW THE BOND WORKS. You're not fighting on the lines and that's it.-

You scoffed and laughed drily, he couldn't possibly think after all this time that he could actually force you to do something.

-That is not your decision to make Loki!! What will you do? Drag me to the fucking back and expect me to simply accept not being there to help you?!?- 

-It's irrational to think that sentiment will give us ANY ADVANTAGE HERE- his voice was raspy and loud, the veins on his forehead swollen.

-You think I'M being IRRATIONAL?? Fine. Let's take out the obvious backfiring of the strategy and focus on the reality of this situation. THIS IS MY FIGHT AS WELL. I WAS ALSO CHAINED UP IN THAT CELL REMEMBER THAT!-

He was pacing around now, his fists had gone from white to red and so had his face, his head was shaking in denial, you were starting to think he wasn't listening to you, not really.

-NO. I THINK YOURE BEING A BLIND BITCH. I AM TRYING TO PROTECT YOU!- 

The blow of his words shoot so hard you leaned back slightly, your eyes widening, he had never called you a bitch before, and you were having none of it. 

-You wont protect me by pushing me away. I thought we were past that point already.- you stated.

His jaw hung and twisted, he was knee deep in rage by now. You guessed it through his following words.

-Fine. Then be my guest. Get yourself killed.- he hissed

By now your throat was sore with yelling, but it still knotted up tight, tears prickled at your eyes, tears of anger, frustration, sadness, and hurt.  
He didn't flinch or stop himself, he simply stared at you, burning you with his eyes, and then turned around, unclenching his fists only to clench them again. You were about to tell him to get the fuck out of your sight, but then you realized you didn't want to sleep in the same bed he had hugged you in this morning.

So you opted to take the sharpest most hissing breath you had ever drawn in, and with it came heavy hot streaks of tears down your cheeks, your walk wasn't heavy and feral, it was swift and quick in fury, getting you through the door fast enough that your hair flew behind you, you slammed the door with a force that made the lights on the sides of it shake and clatter, you were sure you'd wake someone up with the resounding bang it made.

And you had, out of the door down the hallway walked Thor with a face that read concern and shock. You barely acknowledged him, drawing faster and harsher breaths by the second, your teeth gritting against each other.

-Everything alright?- 

Another deep, loud breath, and a shaky exhale. He was simply worried, he didn't know, or maybe he did know, after all, Loki and you were as loud fighting as you were fucking.

-Everything's perfect.- you spat in sarcasm.

You heard him shuffle on his spot, and you turned to him, he was in casual wear, he looked around and then back at you like he understood exactly what you were going through.

-A drink?- he said, his eyes kind.

You raised a brow to yourself, glanced at the door, and nodded, you could use a drink, you needed a drink...or two, or three.  
To your surprise, he went back inside his room, and then came back out, a small flask in hand, and gestured for you to follow him, you walked about a feet or two behind him, the bulging headache threatening at your temples was sure to only get worse after drinking, but you couldn't care less, now your steps were in fact heavy and stomping, loud in the silence of the empty hallways.

Another lounge like room came into view, a good portion of it lined with tall glass windows, it was barely lit in some fluorescent lights, and there was a large classy looking bar on one of the sides, lit with more warm lights, Thor took down two stools that were placed upside down and gestured for you to sit, you mumbled a thank you and positioned yourself, you thought he'd go to the other side of the bar, but instead he sat besides you and grabbed two glasses and napkins to place them over from behind it.

He pulled out the small flask and stopped.

-It's Asgardian, aged for more than a 100 years, i left a small reserve here on Earth for when I'm visiting-

It seemed almost like he was asking for permission, and you nodded, holding your glass to him, he poured the deep golden liquid.

-Loki can be tough to know...- he smiled small at you.

You huffed and cocked a brow.  
-You have no idea...- you mumbled.

He stopped pouring and looked at you, you met his eyes, for a second you forgot you were speaking to his brother, maybe you just needed to say that. If someone had any idea, it was him.

-Sorry...- you said.

A chuckle bounced through his throat and he smiled while pouring himself the drink. You noticed he had poured more for you, he sure knew...

-That's alright...he can be frustrating and...hard to understand.- he sighed- But I've learned he isn't always as out of his mind as he seems...- 

You took a sip, or better said a gulp, at your drink in silent agreement, it burned down your throat and up to your head, your mouth left open for a second at the harsh sudden sensation, you glanced down at it, it certainly had the kick you needed.

-So...how much did you hear?- you asked.

-Not much...- he replied quickly, you looked at him, giving him the okay to be honest.

-Well...- he trailed off- I started listening after the slur...-

The bitch. He meant the bitch. You raised your brows, unbothered, and took another gulp, this time keeping it in your mouth and under your tongue for a bit before swallowing, your breath already smelling like alcohol.

-I'm sure he didn't mean it...-

-Good. Then he can apologize.- you stated.

-He's very fond of you, my brother...- he smiled, sipping at his glass.

It was meant to be comforting, but you snorted at the fact. Yes he was fond of you, he was in love with you, that didn't mean he could excuse behaving like an utter asshole. There was a pause as you thought back to his yelling, it hurt, all the things he'd say, of course he didn't mean them, but they still stung.

-We hadn't fought like that since...- you stopped yourself from saying "since i found out he's hiding the Tesseract"-...for years...- you trailed off.

Thor didn't respond, but he did look your way, encouraging you to feel comfortable, it was easy to feel comfortable around him, he was like this very muscular dog.

-This time, it was a bit different, I can't remember the last time he insulted me- you took a smaller sip- I guess i got out of the habit- you smiled to yourself.

Thor frowned at your statement, and you caught yourself again, raising your hand.

-Not that he insulted me all the time,- you chuckled- Heaven knows I wouldn't allow it...but well, as you said, Loki can be...Loki.- you shrugged.

Now he was the one to chuckle, he then took a deep breath.

-Life hasn't been very kind to my brother...- he said in a sad tone- But you seem to make him rather happy.-

He gifted you an emphatic, knowing smile, and this time you returned it.

-Life isn't very kind to none of us...- you mumbled, also knowingly, not of you, but of him.

-Ah yes...lately it seems as though it's my turn- he raised the eyebrow from his lost eye and chuckled.

You patted his back the same way a wise comrade would to an old friend.  
-You'll be fine...- 

For the next few seconds you finished your drink in silence, and Thor topped off yours, after the second sip you took, he spoke yet again.

-I believe i should thank you, and also apologize.- your brows pinched- Thank you, for bringing my Avenger friends back to their senses, and apologize...for my father's actions, I don't know all of the story, but I've learned my father wasn't so peaceful after all...-

His face became serious, matching his tone. You nodded slightly, poor guy had barely just found out what Loki and you had known for years, you looked down at the liquor in your glass.

-Truth...can burn as one swallows it, it can even make you cry if it's been aged for years, but once the burning is done, it's sweet, in a rewarding way...- you said.

Thor looked at your glass as you looked at him, nodding absentmindedly.

-I think it's time i tell you a story...- you whispered, about to give him the burn.


	21. Of A Time Long Ago

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING ⚠️: This chapter contains heavy angst and descriptions of murder, death and blood. If any of these make you uncomfortable leave a comment and I’ll give you a summary 
> 
> Also, know that you are not alone, and if you have anything you'd like to share, we can talk on my DMs over on Twitter (redlacegirl)

-My mother was a Valkyrie, my father was a healer in the palace, one of the only men in the field, that was how he met my mom. They both worked for the crown, it was their proudest achievement, they believed in your father's reign, they believed he was a symbol of peace,- you trailed off.

-Everyone did...- Thor whispered.

You nodded, and continued your story.

-Before you realize that the numbers don't fit, no, i hadn't been born when my mother went off to fight Hela, it was decades before my parents would settle down and have a family.-

-So, what happened?-

-She survived.- you sipped your drink.

-And she, were did she go?-

-Home. She dragged back to Asgard, it took her months to get back, when she arrived at my father's door agonizing, he took care of her. You see, she was torn, her entire life purpose had crumbled only to show it was a wall of lies carefully constructed in gold, and she knew that now, but what about the rest of the people? Who would ever believe her? My father did. Turns out, when you're a healer in the palace, you start picking up the pieces that don't fit, older healers started to go missing after the Valkyries set off, and slowly but surely all the healers left were young, like my father. For a while, some healers also serviced as maids and other roles. How can a palace of that wealth and magnitude not have enough people to serve? It's because they needed them out.- your voice turned dark.

Thor didn't respond, didn't ask a question, he just listened, guessing the lengths his father had gone to to erase Hela out of Asgardian memory, and you felt more and more like sharing, maybe the alcohol was getting to you.

-My mother tried to warn the community, she tried so hard for them to believe her, she wouldn't go out without a fight, she wouldn't stand it. But, she was wiser than she was fiercer, my parents went into hiding, i still debate myself if that was the right thing to do or not...i think she did so too.- you got lost in thought- After years, they had me, i was the signed promise that they couldn't risk it anymore, not with suddenly everything to lose. Instead they remained hidden, somewhere very deep in the woods, between the mountains, they taught me everything they knew, my dad, he was a loving man, he taught me how to heal and help people, and my mother, she taught me to be strong and stand my ground, not because they wanted me to know how to be a warrior. I needed to be a warrior.-

-Incase someone found you...- he said.

You nodded.  
-My grandma, she was a witch, she helped my parents, she knew i was coming, she knew who i was. She was supposed to teach me perfect control and balance, and she did, but not for long.- you swallowed thickly.

\- I was during my teenage years when it happened...I should've known something wasn't right. My father kissed me twice that night before going to bed, and they left me something, wrapped in a tunic, tied with a holster, that they told me not to open yet. They said it was a gift. The night fell just like it did everyday, quiet, and dark, so quiet...i still remember it lulling me into sleep. And in the span of what felt like minutes but really had been hours, everything felt wrong. That was the first time my cunning buzzed at the base of my skull, nothing was right, all felt disturbed, and i panicked, my feet practically had a mind of their own when they walked me downstairs.-

You had to swallow another gulp of spit before the next part, an image you had left buried at the back of your mind came back to you, your vision twitched and unfocused, and your breathing ragged with the memory of light devoid eyes.

-That was also the first time i saw that much blood...- you whispered- They didn't just kill them, they slaughtered them...my mom...had been attacked from the back, how much of a coward do you have to be?- 

You turned to him, your eyes stung with tears that you forced away.

-And my dad, had dragged himself to be close to her, he bled out trying to get to her, and died a single foot apart from her body.- 

You zoned out on the memory, your father's fingers extended to the very last effort, and your mom lying on her back with shocked eyes and a bloody nose, both of them fallen over a puddle of their own blood. You hadn't even dared check on your grandma, when you approached the archway of her room, all you saw through the darkness was her hand hanging from her bed, dripping blood.

-Every time i think back to that, i ask myself...How cruel can death be?- you whimpered.

-Sygin...- Thor mumbled, his tone heavy with guilt and shock.

Your eyes were staring intently at the glasses lined up behind the bar, your shoulders hunched, and you blinked a few times before coming back to yourself, and realizing you were crying, and gripping the glass in your hand a bit too tight.

The expression on Thor's face matched his voice, and you wiped your cheeks rapidly.

-After that, i heard them outside, getting ready to burn down the house, i thought of it, of staying back, of burning with the house. Instead, my cunning told me to disappear. They knew my mother was alive, they knew my grandma and dad had helped her, but they didn't know about me. I took the tunic, and i ran.- you stated, downing the rest of your drink.

There was a moment of cold silence, you started wondering if maybe you should've asked Thor if he actually wanted to hear this.

-I thought you should know.- you told him.

His mouth pressed into a thin line, and he placed his hand over yours in a comforting, almost thankful gesture.

-Sygin...i am in no position to be out of the blame for the things my father did, and therefore, i would like to give you my most sincere apologies. I'd like to think we could be friends in the short future, and for the dreadful things you had to see, I'd like to offer you my trust and comradeship.-

A small, but genuine smile tugged at your mouth, and then disappeared in a painful curl, the Son of Odin, apologizing, the action struck a part of you that had been asleep for years. No, it didn't bring them back, nothing ever would, but for some reason, the heartfelt apology did more for you than you thought, and you nodded.

-Thank you.- a broken whisper.

He poured another small amount of the alcohol, and offered you more, but you shook your head.

-Do you mind me asking about you and my brother?- he said, hesitatingly.

You sighed, and slid your glass to him, he chuckled and served you again. He was just about to speak when you raised a finger and gulped the strong liquid, then he spoke.

-Well...to be honest, I'm not sure where to start...- he laughed, and thought for a moment.

\- Do you love him?- he said with furrowed and curious brows.

-Is it so hard to believe?- you teased.

-No, no, forgive me I didn't mean it like that- 

You chuckled at his apparent panic, and ushered the leftover pain away again.

-That's quite alright...Yes, i do love him. He helped me recover my control after, well, after what happened- you started- He could've turned me in, but he didn't...-

-Why do you think that was?- 

-Because...- you smiled in nostalgia- Inside...we were both just lonely hurting children, that needed each other.-

He nodded slowly, humming.

-Don't get me wrong, i almost kill him on sight when i found out he was the prince - you laughed- But, he's my friend, and he saved my life, and i do love him, very much...-

Thor had a proud smirk on his face, your finger ran around the rim of the glass, letting yourself be held by the good memories. You felt the energy hum in your pendant, you let out a dry laugh.

-You don't form a soul bond with someone unless you love them.- you raised your brows.

-Now that is something i do want to ask about- he turned his body to you.

-A soul bond...- you started, thinking- Is a magic enchantment that ties you with whoever's love belongs to you, for eternity, and beyond.-

-Right...but what is it? What...happens?-

-The soul bond makes one stronger and weaker at the same time. It's a shared connection, meaning...-

-You and Loki share a soul- he finished for you.

You nodded.  
-We're eternally linked to each other, he is me and i am him in a very specific particular way, when we're together, our physical power is weaker, but that's the thing, you're not supposed to need it, because you are one, and you are together. However, when we're separated, our power is strong and blazing, but the agony of being distanced, the constant constricting of our souls not being together, makes the power useless...or at least, that's how it seemed.- you trailed off.

-What do you mean?- 

-When Loki fell into the hands of Thanos, the pain of our souls ringed so loudly, the distance combined with the physical pain ended up showing us a side of the bond we never considered...I was so desperate to save him, to be with him again and know that we'd both be okay, that agony paired up with rage, and they both fed into my power in a twist we never saw coming.-

Thor kept his brows in a frown, still a bit confused, but now he had the right questions to ask.

-So is that the benefit that comes with it? Is that how Loki has managed to avoid death all this time?-

-No. There is no benefit, that is the thing about the soul bond, there are no benefits, it's the truest promise, if one of the two has false intentions, they die instantly as the ritual is taking place. And it doesn't fool death, as a matter of fact, it makes death even more painful. When one of us dies, their fading heartbeat drums on the other's ears, until it slowly fades away, and you feel a part of yourself you didn't know was there crumble and rip out of you.-

-Your soul...- he guessed.

-Their soul, their half of you, your own half of you.- you whispered- "Death...is unstoppable."- 

You finished, reciting the lines of the promise to yourself.

-I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but it doesn't sound like a stroke of good fortune- he tilted his head.

-It's not...it's a curse- you finished your third, and last, drink.

-Why would you want to do it then?-

You nodded to yourself, that was a good question, you had asked yourself that question before. The answer was unsatisfying for those who didn't understand what it felt like to be willing to die, and live, for another.

You ended up simply shrugging, and then smiling, thinking of the night Loki and you gave a spiritual presence to the connection you had always shared.

-For love...- you whispered.

His gaze fell to the side and down, taking in all the information you had enlightened him with, the only sign that he listened was a small nod he gave a few seconds later, and then his mouth opened, and closed, and opened again.

-And did Heimdall not know of this enchantment?-

-Oh yes, he even helped us a tad- you giggled.

Thor shook his head and sighed, then let out an irony filled deep laugh, taking the last swig of his drink.

-For someone who sees everything he sure is good at playing blind...-


	22. Refusing

The walk back to the rooms was less fuming, and your mood a lot lighter, partly for the liquor, and partly for the talking, Thor was good company, and a good brother in law for that matter, at least now you had a ranting buddy for Loki's shenanigans.

As you reached the hallway, you sighed heavily, your arms crossed, you really didn't want to see him again, not yet. You were still pissed, he did call you a bitch, you weren't exactly looking forward to entering a room with deafening tension buzzing in the walls.

-You think he's doing better now?- Thor whispered.

-Honestly, I don't know, and I don't care to know...-

You crossed your arms thinking, you could look for another random room, maybe one of the lounge rooms had a couch or two where you could snuggle, it didn't seem fair tho, now you did wish Loki had been the one to storm off.

-If you'd like to stay here I'd be willing to sleep on the couch- he smiled sympathetically.

-Thor no offense but if someone is sleeping in the couch it's the small one- you smiled, pointing at yourself- But no thank you, i wouldn't want to intrude...-

-Please, I wouldn't want to leave you out...-

Well, he wasn't wrong, there wasn't really anywhere else you could stay. You ended up making a deal, you accepted his offer if you slept on the couch, you didn't feel comfortable sleeping on his bed anyways.  
He lended you a heavy blanket and a nice pillow, and assured you his brother would come to his senses.

-Well, he better do.- you scoffed.

-Oh before i forget, Stark is hosting a party in celebration of his engagement, and well he'd like you both to attend.-

You furrowed your brows and turned to look at him with an expression full of confusion and surprise, not only at the terrible timing for such celebration, but that you could not find a good reason Stark would actually want you and Loki to attend, unless...

-He wishes to keep a close eye on you- Thor explained.

You opened your mouth in an understanding "Ah...", that made a lot more sense. Thor mentioned the party was after tomorrow and with that you both said goodnight, you still weren't looking forward to it, but you did love parties. Hopefully your tense argument with Loki will have receded by then.

It took a while for you to sleep, there's nothing more deafening than the silence of a dim room, but the silence isn't what's deafening, it's the sound of hammering thoughts that can now arise from the back of the mind. You thought your talking with Thor had helped your feelings ease up, but it was just a distraction working all too well. 

Still processing your husband's words and every intention behind them you could recounter, something was bothering him, you could tell, his anger was defensive like many other times, but how can he get so enraged because of a sole un detailed thing you revealed? How can anybody?

Loki wasn't your standard nice good guy, everyone knew that, but going from there to shaming you for following a plan you had both agreed on based on these people trusting you, and calling you a bitch, was a step too far, and still, that wasn't the worst part.

"Be my guest then. Get yourself killed."

You had to keep reminding yourself he couldn't actually mean that, he couldn't actually not care whether you died or not. His fuming features came back to your mind, the bloodshot eyes, the wide dark pupils, the gritting teeth and the twitching lip. You weren't afraid of Loki, but the towering stance he took when he got defensive could make anyone feel uneasy.

"Be my guest then. Get yourself killed."

Bitter words that resounded in your mind and choked at your throat, hitching your breaths, your lip curled downwards as the phrase dug itself into your ears, a single tear escaped your eye and rolled down your temple. He loved you, that was without a doubt, he would've died if he didn't, but words can sting harshly at the heart, and he had been restless with his.

***

You woke up just like you went to sleep, hurt and with a headache, waking up felt like catching up to an uncomfortable dream where things were in conflict, but it wasn't up to you to fix them, you sighed as you caught up to last night yet again.

Even if the anger wasn't as bad as it was with the Tesseract incident, the pain was similar, or was it the headache? You couldn't really tell, you couldn't even tell if the headache was from clenching your jaw and crying to sleep, or because of the drinking. Either way, you didn't want to see him, you couldn't even muster the thought of speaking to him, he had been so mean, so cold, and didn't even bother going after you. Maybe it was for the best, maybe you both needed to cool off.

Well, at least you knew he did. 

Another deep sigh, followed by a yawn, you pressed your hands on your face, remembering this wasn't your room therefore you couldn't really stay here all day. When you sat up and tried to turn your neck you were met with tight pain extending to your shoulder blade, clearly the result of the bad sleeping spot and position.

Great...

You looked around slowly, and realized you were alone, Thor was gone, you were silently thankful, you didn't feel like making small talk or anything much. You sat and stretched your arms and back, then pulled up your boots and straightened your clothes as you walked to the bathroom, your hair was rather messed up, obviously, and your face was puffed, faint dark circles forming under your eyes.

Thankfully there was a small unopened mouthwash in one of the cabinets, you folded the blanket Thor had given you, not without contemplating snuggling under it again and staying there. There was a knock on the door when you placed the pillow back on the bed.

-Come in- you said.

The door opened slowly and Thor smiled at you, placing his hand on his hip.

-Morning!- he exclaimed, clearly a morning person, you should've guessed, considering Loki isn't.

-Morning...- you replied, grabbing your jacket and stepping out into the hallway- What's the time?-

-1100- he stated- Care for a little training?- 

Now both his hands were on his hips and his brows were raised in eagerness, you bit back a laugh and were about to deny his offer, your mind a little too drained and your body a little too contractured for it, then you heard a door open and looked over Thor's shoulder, he turned with the sound, and a small knot formed at your stomach.

Once you saw him, you stood corrected, the anger was as bad as the Tesseract day, you were boiling and aching with it at the same time, he didn't even look sorry, his face was annoyingly blank, you felt like punching him and crying at the same time, but all that came out of that feeling was a hard frown, a lip twitch, and a breath just deep enough that only he would notice what it meant.

And yet he just stood there, looking back at you, his breathing slow, you looked over to Thor and softened your expression just a bit.

-Sure- you nodded- How about you go ahead? I'll meet you there in a while.- 

Thor got the memo and gave you a knowing nod, and with that and a small morning greeting to Loki, he walked away, you heard his steps fade away as you directed your gaze back to Loki, waiting for an apology. Instead, he looked you up and down.

-What were you doing in my brother's room?- he squinted at you.

Your arms crossed and your head tilted. You were already boiling with rage at what you thought he was suggesting.

-Are you insinuating something?- you snarled.

-No.-

-Good.-

There was another anticipation filled silence, both your stares sharp and full of resentment as you stood there, waiting for him to speak again, because you wouldn't be the one to speak, you didn't have anything to apologize for. If breathing wasn't automatic you were sure you'd both stop doing it as you looked at each other, his breathing was more prominent than yours though, you tried searching in his face for any signs that he also slept like crap, that he also cried. Of course, you were met with nothing. 

-Stark wants us at an engagement party tomorrow, he wants to keep a close eye on us.- you said in an empty tone.

-Are you ready to start listening to me?-

He barely got to finished the question before you turned and walked away. No, he didn't get to ask you or tell you anything that wasn't an apology, he knew the words you deserved to hear, and until he decided to speak them you wouldn't listen to another thing.

*** 

You knew Thor was a towering force of muscle, but you never thought he'd be this strong and heavy, every one of his strikes had a weight to it that tumbled you. But you weren't just giving up, an abundance of muscle meant a lack of speed, and Thor wasn't the exception, so you used speed on your favor, dodging, jumping and rolling out of his reach until you saw the chance to attack, and once you did, you used his weight against him, backfiring his strength.

His sword came at you, you turned your body to dodge it and before he could pull back you grabbed his arm tight and turned with it, with a grunt you twisted him and threw him against the ground, the sword falling from his hand as he fell with a resounding thud.

-You need to work on your speed Odinson- you panted.

-Very well...- he sighed- You win...-

His hands went up in surrender, he was tired as well, you smiled and offered him your hand, he took it and grunted as he lifted himself. You were properly sweaty and exhausted, sweaty from taking your anger out on a poor punching bag (there may have been some tearing of the material involved) and then later fighting Thor, and exhausted because well you slept, and felt, like shit...

This morning it felt like Loki was nowhere near an apology, he looked at you accusingly as if you were the one who had some explaining to do, if he needed time to cool off, that was perfectly fine with you, but he could save himself the glare and the stiff shoulders. You knew the longer you waited for that apology, the more it'll hurt, but there was no way you'd put aside the dreadful yelling from last night.

You exhaled as you sat down on one of training room benches, your neck pulling and hurting as soon as you moved, and now your other limbs had joined it, maybe training wasn't the best idea, but you needed to let off some steam.  
Steam, shower, you needed a shower now, you groaned at the idea, you couldn't shower at Thor's room, that would be plain weird, but you really didn't want to go to yours and risk seeing Loki.

Speaking of the devil, you saw him appear through the glass doors, looking around, stopping for a second at where Thor was on the other side of the room, then kept looking until he found your eyes, and you stood up, looking away and starting to take the bandages on your wrists and knuckles off slowly in an excuse to not pay him attention, but you heard his heavy steps approaching you, and you fought the urge to make any gestures.

-I need to speak to my brother...- he stated.

You looked up at him briefly to find he was looking to the side instead of you, your eyes went back down, not giving him an answer, what did you have to do with it?

-Then I'd like to speak with you...- he said, breathing in and looking at you.

Now you did meet his stare, scanning his face to find the emotion you were looking for: regret, sorry, or something of the sort, you looked into his eyes, blue and bright and gorgeous, your lip twitched, you hated that they were so pretty and endearing.

-Fine.- you mumbled.

And with that he walked away, heading to where his brother stood, you watched the exchange between them, Loki told him something, Thor responded, Loki interrupted him and Thor shook his head and shrugged his shoulders, saying something else. Loki crossed his hands in front of him and replied, tilting his head, you knew by that motion that he was either making a snarky comment or trying something. You settled for the first when you saw he turned to walk away as he finished, but before he could, Thor placed a hand on his shoulder and stood in front of him, his back to you.

Thor seemed to speak slowly, and moved his hands as he spoke, you furrowed your brows, and then saw Loki's eyes twitch, and he looked over at you. You didn't look away, because whatever he was thinking, it didn't mean good news for you, you knew it in the glare he held you in.

His fingers twitched, fighting the urge to curl them into fists, and you decided it would probably be a better idea to have your talk outside, something told you it wouldn't end up necessarily in a pleasant way. He brushed next to Thor, making his way to you with brows slightly drawn together in annoyance, and you swung the bandages around your neck before he was standing in front of you.

-What did you tell my brother?- he inquired.

You huffed, bloody hel Thor...

-Why?- you simply said.

-Well i wanted to put myself up to speed since you two now seem like such close friends...- he squinted his eyes at you.

Your lip twitched at his scoffing tone. Clearly the apology you deserved wasn't coming soon, which only made your time in this conversation being thrown away to waste, so you decided to cut it short.

-I can tell him whatever i wish because despite what you seem to think Loki, I make my own bloody decisions.- you hissed.

He opened his mouth to sleep but you stepped forward, bumping on his shoulder purposely and walking away and out of the training room into the hallway, you walked fast in frustration, you heard him call your name, once, then twice, then...

-SYGIN!- he exclaimed a third time, loud enough to make you stop.

You turned around swiftly to find him at the other end of the hallway you had entered, leading up to the rooms. You could feel the anger and hurt bubble up at his volume.

-What?- you snapped.

-You make your own decisions as long as it is about your own life, but you do not get to decide if our privacy can simply be shared with my brother whenever you feel like being petty!- he snarled.

You mouth fell open, not at shock or surprise, but at pure pain and rage, you couldn't even start to find the words to express how much he infuriated you, a thousand curses and screams running around bumping inside your head, until they escaped.

-You really think, that i cried to your brother, and told him how i found my dead family laying in a pool of their own blood, and simply explained the soul bond to him, and told him i loved you...BECAUSE I WISHED TO SPITE YOU???- you screamed.

Now tears followed your words, you head shaking and your teeth gritting as you spat them at him, hoping they'd wound him as much as his had wounded you.

-YOU THINK I WAS TRYING TO BE PETTY?! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! DEMANDING FOR AN EXPLANATION AND DARING TO ACT LIKE YOU'VE DONE NOTHING TO HURT ME WHEN JUST LAST NIGHT YOU WISHED DEATH UPON ME!!-

The groggy sound of your pain bounced and echoed off the walls, slicing and tearing the silence, and somehow building a brand new, more heavy one, your mind now ringing with the firing shots of your words. Loki stood still, his stance rigid and straight, his face falling slowly as he took in your accusation, he looked at you, at your heaving chest and your tear flowing eyes as reality sunk into him, or better said, was forced into him.

As his eyes softened and so did yours, making way to a painful small sob, you thought he'd finally come to his senses, finally see that he was being mean and hurtful, you hoped he'd walk to you and hug you, and whispered how sorry he was into your hair, and then you could sleep with him again tonight.

You were disappointed again to stand in silence, waiting for something that never came. And you sighed, disheartened, but not shocked one bit, your shoulders slumped and you looked away from him, before turning, and walking away with heavy steps, your vision fogged, drowning in tears the farther away you walked without him chasing after you.

The room was cold, you had locked the door, you just wanted to stand, or sit, under a hot shower, and later sink into the bed to get an actual decent sleep. You cried in the shower, and then you cried against the pillow, moving as far away from his spot as you could, refusing to take in his scent, refusing to let it make you think of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! Just wanted to let you know, i you love Adam Driver like me, I’m writing a Philip Altman fic! It’s called Someone Like You, and you can find it on here or in my Wattpad @redlacegirl


	23. Be Better

If Thor hadn't insisted on you assisting Stark's engagement party, you would have probably stayed in your room for the rest of the day, waiting for Loki to come crawling and begging. Because at this point, sadness was gone, it had morphed in with anger and now they oozed from you in the form of a glare, pressed lips, and crossed arms, your index tapping at your oposite elbow as if waiting impatiently for something.

And you were waiting. Waiting for an apology, waiting for Loki to ease the battle between pride and regret. Because you knew he was too proud to come knocking at the door asking you to let him in, but you also knew that he knew the more he delayed the apology, the more it would take for you to forgive him.

When the clock hit 8 at night and nothing had happened, you lifted your chin, and decided that if you had to go to this thing as a not proclaimed prisoner and see your stubborn husband, at least you'd have your fun. You missed your wood and stone house back in Norway, you missed your lose dresses and Narvi, but at least here you were having some old fashioned fun like the one you had back in Asgard.

You showered and dried your hair, you came to stand in front of the mirror and took a look, your resentment filled eyes looking back at you, determined to make Loki feel...jealous? Regretful? Sorry? Something like that, at this point you didn't bother caring anymore, he was smart, he knew what he had to do, and you knew he had the strength to do it.

A faint glow of blue magic came down your head through your body, dressing you in smoky brown makeup, a blood red lip, and an elegant deep green silk dress with a slit on one of the legs that you took a second glance at, and decided to make it higher until it reached your hip, exposing your entire leg.

You ran a hand up your thigh and hip, following with your eyes as you checked your appearance, the black heels simple as the dress, but still delicate and sensual. The glint of the golden necklace giving it a final touch, you smiled down at yourself, satisfied with your appearance, and made your way out of the room.

It had been a while since the last time you'd gone to a party, last time had been years ago, funny enough, it was a celebration on the royal palace of Asgard, Loki had managed not only to sneak you inside and spend a good portion of the evening with you, he had also managed to conceal the not so small detail that it was a celebration meant for him, it was the youngest prince's birthday, his birthday.

You rolled your eyes at the memory, and shooed it away, it was a beautiful memory, it was happy, but you didn't want to think about it now, it brought you more sorrow now than it did smiles. The music and chatter sounded closer as you rounded the corner to appear at the balcony surrounding the incredibly big room, an adorned staircase going down from the long balcony to the lower room, one side entirely covered with windows.

Your eyes quickly scanned the room for the black long hair and sharp cheekbones you wanted to avoid, not finding the sight of it, you made your way down the stairs, holding onto the railing, but looking still around the room, loose hair bouncing with the sway of your hips, heels clicking and echoing around the talking of people, your exposed leg and back catching the attention of a few men you caught on your peripherals.

A small smile drew on your face, wishing for a second Loki were in the room to see the bold stares of men who felt powerful enough to dare look your way, clueless as to what you'd do to them if they took the chance to act on the actions that hid behind their eyes.

You found the bar and decided to settle there, you'd rather be sitting and drinking than standing around in a single spot, in the distance you heard Thor's unmistakable laugh and turned your head to follow it, he was talking with Stark, probably congratulating him and the woman leaning by his side that you guessed was his fiancé, she seemed firm and decisive, had a nice white smile.

-Opposites attract...-

A smooth female voice caught your attention, behind the bar stood the red headed woman you identified as the Black Widow, she was looking the same way as you, but turned as you did, your exposed leg crossed over the other one.

-I suppose they do...- you replied, turning to look once more before she spoke again.

-The same with you and Loki isn't it?- she offered you a small closed smile.

Your brow raised in a small scoff, not giving her further reply.

-Trouble in paradise?- she asked with a now bigger smile.

She grabbed two glasses and a bottle, pouring a light golden bubbly liquid in them, and you took one, taking a closer look at her and her actions, emanating a similar air than the woman by Stark's side.

There was a difference in the way the two women looked and the energy they emanated, Starks fiancé looked determined and confident, she oozed power she didn't exactly know she had, or maybe she did, but was incredibly humble about it. The Black Widow you could relate to more, in her appearance you saw she had power and knew it, your confidence mirrored hers tonight.

You smiled to yourself.  
I like her...

-With Loki?- you said, sipping from the tall glass, the alcohol much lighter than Thor's special liquor- Trouble is the paradise-

-Must be rough...- she said, raising her brows.

-Just how i like it.- you smirked before sipping from the glass again.

Her head tilted and her brow raised, you could tell she liked you too. Before the conversation could go on, a man approached the spot next to you, he seemed old, not too old, definitely not your age, but mature.

-Hi there...- he said, you side eyed him up and down.

His eyes were green and hungry, but instantly nervous when you looked at him, his physique was okay, just okay, and he was not as tall as Loki, then again, not many were, but you admired the courage. He exuded another type of confidence you also knew, overwhelming, unattractive confidence, at a point where it was repulsive, one of the most fake types.

-Hi.- you replied.

-I don't believe we've met, how do you know Mr Stark?- 

My husband tried to kill him.

-Mutual acquaintances...- you stated.

He nodded.  
-And are you here with someone?-

-Not exactly...- you trailed off.

-I see, i have to say, and forgive me if I'm being bold...-

You swallowed another sip of the drink and turned to give him a stern look, waiting for whatever boldness he was about to spit. His fingers lifted to run through a thin strand of your hair and your stern look turned into a full on glare.

-You are drop dead gorgeous...- he started, looking up at you with what you thought he probably thought was a flirtatious look.

You exhaled and turned to look forward at a glaring Black Widow, you placed down the glass and exchanged a look with her to tell her you could handle this, and she backed off, turning her attention away.

-Really?- you said in a sarcastic tone.

-Of course...- he accentuated- You know i have the Jaguar outside...perhaps we could take a ride to a more private place?-

His hand came to rest on your thigh, close to the knee, and you eyed the ice picker behind the bar, but you really didn't want to stain your dress with blood, maybe you should've worn black.

-You have around...- you tilted your head looking at him-...five seconds, to take your hand off of me, if you don't want your night to get ruined.-

-Oh come on beautiful...what's the big deal? You're here alone aren't you? Have some fun...- he shot you another disgusting smile.

-Actually, she's here with me.-

You knew the low gruff voice and the warning tone as soon as you heard them, Loki stood by the man's side, looking down at him with a glare so ice cold and sharp he could cut the man's head off. Said man also caught this glare, and made the smart decision of scurrying away from the bar stool, Loki followed him with his eyes until he was no longer near, and now he was left with you, alone.

-I had it under control.- you said, not meeting his gaze.

-He had his hands on you.-

You cocked a brow.  
-Well, he didn't call me a bitch.-

There was a silence, and as you gulped the last of your drink you also swallowed a tinge of guilt, perhaps that was a bit too mean too suddenly. He bit his cheek, his gaze down, you thought maybe he'd lash out, that his shoulders would be tense and his fists curled, but apparently not. You took a moment to look at him, he was wearing an all black suit, it had faint details in gold here and there, like two thin chains hanging from the waist.

Only he could wear that intricate suit and look that good, to top it all off, his hair was tied in the same messy bun he had on last time you were mad at him. He knew exactly what he was doing.

The bastard looked delightful. And it bugged you, yes. You didn't think that was his point though, he probably wanted to make it easier for you to forgive him, and you were still deciding if you'd let it work or not. For now, he wasn't saying anything, the silence wasn't awkward, in fact it was comfortable in a very annoying way, but also heavy.

-Parties here are quite different...- he observed.

He wasn't getting a word out of you until he apologized. And explained.  
You simply gave him a solitary glance and drifted your gaze off to the now empty glass in front of you, around the room the music became a bit louder, still a simple, soft tune, but a bit more resounding now, encouraging dancing from the couples scattered around the floor.

You looked back at the few couples that now walked to the center, near the musicians playing, to start their dance. Now your anger was growing cold and you started to feel slightly hurt again, you wished he would just apologize and talk so that at least you could dance with him for a while, you loved dancing with him.

-I love dancing with you as well...- he whispered to you, almost inaudible.

You turned to look at him, of course your minds had decided to bridge at this exact moment. He lifted a careful hand with soft eyes to you, a silent and broken request, you looked at it, then up at him.

-You can't expect to act like nothing happ...-

-I know...- he cut you off, not mad or snarky, but knowingly.

You sighed and took his hand, following whichever game or strategy he was trying to pull off. He walked besides you, when you were standing on a side of the improvised dancing area, he turned and pulled you closer, slowly and careful, you didn't meet his eyes until his hand was on your waist and yours was on his shoulder, his fingers interlaced with yours on the other hand, and he brought it to his chest, right next to his heart.

Your nose brushed his as he came closer, his forehead lazily leaning against yours, barely touching as you started to move slowly with the rhythm of the music, you closed your eyes, trying to take in the moment and at the same time not be too taken away by it, you were still hurt.

-You look breathtaking...- you heard him say, and you inhaled sharply- You always look breathtaking...-

-Stop.- you whispered, you didn't want his compliments.

His head lifted, and he placed his chin to your temple, he knew you wouldn't meet his eyes, that you didn't want to, you were thankful he wasn't trying for you to meet them. You opened your eyes, they slowly fell to the side, unfocused and still, you could smell that same scent you tried to avoid yesterday in bed, and a hint of cologne. Seconds passed and turned into minutes while you danced, close and calm, intimate as if you two were alone back in your very humble, dimly lit home in Asgard.

And finally he spoke.

-I'm trying to do things right...- he started, whispering so only you could hear him- I'm trying to be the person you deserve...the man you didn't have all those years ago, the man who could've protected you, and not turned his back against you.-

You breathed slowly, taking in his words, analyzing and figuring them out, just listening.

-I have serious doubts that i could ever be that man...- he trailed off.

Now your head lifted, pulling away from his close touch to look up at him, you met a pair of pressed lips and sorrowful eyes. His lip quivered, and he continued.

-And I'm sorry...I'm sorry i brought so much trouble into our lives, I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, but mostly, I'm sorry for all the times I've been the one to hurt you...I'm sorry for the times my own pain and irrationality blinded me and resulted in your tears.-

His eyes shone with the glint of forming tears, he swallowed, containing himself as much as he could.

-I don't want to lose you, Syg...- he exhaled.

In his words, in between them, others may have seen mild manipulation and his silver tongue at work, but the truth was, he meant everything he said, and the choking out of those last words told you that they didn't mean "please stay with me even though i hurt you", they meant "please understand that i couldn't bare if you died". It was a true, heartfelt apology, your heart fluttered, he wasn't perfect, he was broken and sometimes emotionally closed up, but he loved you, and most importantly, he was trying.

-I'd rather be dead by your side, than alive and away from you.- a feeling both your lips and your eyes spoke up into his.

You felt his body and shoulders release tension you didn't feel in them until now, his hand brought yours up to kiss it lovingly around your knuckles, and then place it back over his chest, his heartbeat calm and steady. His face then lowered to plant kisses down your cheek to your jaw, a small smile drew on your face.

-I have mixed emotions about that dark shade of lipstick.- he mumbled against your skin.

You giggled softly, you wanted to kiss him as well, but you couldn't exactly take it off right here, instead you placed both your hands on his collar, gripping at the suit fabric, encouraging him to keep his small acts of affection going, he growled so faintly you almost missed it if it weren't for the vibrations on his neck, and his lips made his way right below your earlobe, his hands now encasing your waist.

-I'm also sorry for the degrading slur...- he whispered.

You rolled your eyes, but smirked, glad that he'd apologized for the two terrible things he said separately.

-That's alright...- you whispered back- Let's keep it for under the sheets though.-

You felt his lips tug and form an evil grin, he chuckled, low and satisfied, before pulling you even closer, hands gripping at your waist possessively as he nibbled on your neck, a rather corny giggle came out of you, trying to not forget there were people around, you felt his hands sliding slowly down to your hips before his lips came back to your ear.

-You've caught the attention of more than one clueless mortal- 

-I'm aware...- you responded teasingly.

His lips were pressed right between your temple and your ear in a way he could still have his way with kissing your skin without letting his intentions show more than a simple dancing position.

-I would've loved to see what you would've done to the disgusting creature from the bar, if only he hadn't put his hands on you...- he spoke lowly.

A shiver ran down your spine, the hand on his shoulder slid up to rest on his collar, cupping his neck and jaw. He was feeling possessive, you liked it because he had a right to, you were his, and he was yours, a mutual devotion neither of you shied from.

-You've been an attraction for some of the women as well...- you said, looking around.

There were a few faces relishing on the sight that was your husband when he walked you to the dance floor, you had caught them eyeing him up and down, and who could blame them? He was a god. You heard another short chuckle from him.

-Let them look, let them all look so they'll see how none of them could ever live up to neither of us...- he whispered.

You hummed, a sigh forming on your lungs and a smile stretched from your lips as he spoke your thoughts, you and him, you had been made for each other, him so cold and you so warm.  
His body pulled away to twirl you gently and leave his arm around your body, pressing his against your back, the arm that wasn't around you now placed over your exposed hip.

-Because I'm yours, my goddess...-

A melody to your senses spoken against your hair, sending yet another shiver down your body as you relished on the feeling, his arms around you, possessive yet worshipping for you, and his scent you so profoundly missed and evaded these last two days finally coming back to be breathed into your lungs, his hand so shamelessly stroking at your thigh. Your body ached for his touch just as you had ached for his words of apology, and you could tell he ached for you as well.

The music came to an end and there was a light applause, everyone was facing the small group of flattered musicians and you saw your chance, as if he were a shadow Loki trailed right behind you when he felt you walk away, his hand pressed flat on the small of your back, he followed you up the stairs, turned to the right and into an empty corridor, lit only by the far light coming from the large room down the staircase, the glass walls still well visible and tall, and the chatter still being heard from where you were.

As you turned to face him, leaning your back against the wall, you changed your illusion, urging your dark lipstick away, and as soon as that was gone, he pressed his body against yours, kissing you frenetically, tongues and teeth clashing in the depths of your mouths as he held your waist in his arm, crushing you against the wall, you draped one arm around his neck and left the other one to caress at his chest, his free hand slid up on your thigh and lifted your naked leg up to wrap around his hip, you hummed in approval.

-A revealing dress...- he said as his hand found your bare ass-...and nothing underneath. Are you trying to kill me darling?-

A satisfied grin appeared on your face.  
-I wouldn't dare your highness...- you sung.

He wasted no time, drifting down to your jaw and back on your neck, where he sucked and bit at your skin, your head fell back when his kisses trailed your collarbones and fell to the exposed top of your breasts. As you were getting lost in the wetness of his tongue he lifted you up with both arms holding your ass up against the wall.

-Take me out.- he growled into your neck.

Your hand snaked down to unbutton his pants, his cock already pulsing against the fabric as you stroked through it, springing it free when you tugged at the hem. The slit on your skirt making it easy for your legs to slip out and give him access to you, the smooth fabric cascading to the side. You felt him rub down your folds and into your entrance, he slammed up and split you apart. 

A choked whimper escaped your throat, louder than you intended as he moved up into you. He lifted his face to look at you, breaths crashing together and chests pressed tightly, his hips bucked up hard and steady, building up speed into your core, making your cunt clench and your brows furrow, your hand squeezed at the tensed bicep holding, biting your lip and humming lowly. 

-That's it darling...- he exhaled- Be quiet, wouldn't want to ruin the party now would we?-

You whined quietly, your teeth sinking into your lip just as far as his cock sunk into you, slamming up hard into your cervix making your torso shake with every increasingly fast thrust, stretching you and filling you out, his own breaths coming out shallow and harsh in an attempt not to moan.

He caught your lips on his once again, a moan slipping out into his mouth as he quickened and strengthened his pace, your legs tensed and your hand gripped tight into him at the pounding of his cock deep inside you, making your walls clench and your body drag up and down the wall, his fingers digging into your ass, he pulled away and your mouth fell open, feeling your climax closer.

-Loki...- you panted.

-Tell me darling...-

-Faster, oh gods, fuck me faster...- a small whimper escaping through your words.

Your eyes rolled back as soon as you said it, feeling him pump you fast and hard, hitting the right spot, he buried his face on the crook of your neck, panting hot ragged breaths into your skin, fighting back grunts and growls. His thrusts were hard but becoming sloppy, your breasts starting to bounce even under the tight dress as his hips moved erratically, sending you to your edge, your nails digging and scratching at the fabric of his suit jacket, you let go small mostly controlled moans as you started reaching your high.

-Aaw yes, yes, fuck i'm so close...- you gasped.

His face came up to rest his forehead against yours, gifting you a lustful sea of blue.

-You love it don't you?- he panted- Knowing that just a set of stairs away...there's a room full of people...that they could hear, aagh, that they could hear how good i make you feel...-

You only managed to respond forcing out a short, pathetic whimper, beginning to crumble as your orgasm prickled at your lower belly. His thrusts got harder and his jaw clenched, reaching his high as well, and you managed to get a few words out.

-Make me feel better, cum inside me, cum...- you whined.

That was more than enough to make him tumble and fall from the edge, he snapped his hips up, your body flattened impossibly tight against the wall, and with that your orgasm washed over and down your quivering legs, making you see blurry as you both made an inhuman effort not to scream.  
His shoulders relaxed as he came down, and his thumb caressed at your hip, you panted and gulped, legs starting to go numb, you were thankful he was holding you up, otherwise your walk would've been that of a newborn deer. 

Through the haze of the orgasm, he found your lips, and kissed them softly, tenderly, missing you with his lips, another way of showing how sorry he truly was. His chest shook and he chuckled as he kissed you, you joined him, laughing for a moment at the situation. Your hand ran through the small strands of lose hair around his forehead, forgiving him with your touch.

-Let's not fight ever again...- you whispered.

-No.- he stated, pulling away and looking at you- Let us fight...-

He kissed you again, slowly and deep, and spoke against your mouth.

-And let us learn...- he swallowed- To be better...-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that ladies and gentlemen, is how you apologize to someone. 
> 
> Don't be too relieved, shit's about to go down ☺️


	24. Recognize That Look

Loki's POV:

He held her that night like if he let her go she'd fall apart, he nuzzled her against him and let his embrace try and tell her how sorry he was.

There were a couple of times Loki had seen Sygin with the look she gave him the other day, the morning after their fight. It was a look of pure sadness, it was an expression that conveyed the feeling of a stab in the chest, her eyes puffy and bloodshot and welling up with heavy tears, the way her cheeks flushed when she cried them, and the quivering lip that accompanied them.

He knew that look. The first time he'd seen it was when she found out he was a royal, one of the sons of the king that sent men to slaughter her family, and on top of all of that, he had lied to her, for so long, and she was in love with him even before she found out. That was when he knew he was in love as well, because that face could cause anyone's heart to ache, but his heart shattered, it made him hurt so bad he even cried too, he felt like pleading for forgiveness and disappearing from her life to never hurt her again at the same time.

Now she was tangled against him, her skin so soft and warm and her face relaxed as she slept. He hadn't been able to sleep well until last night, fuming with the fear of not being able to protect her blindfolding him, and behind it all, missing her, not having her besides him to share rage and worry. 

He absentmindedly stroke the scars on her back, watching her exposing them yesterday in that dress felt like swallowing acid, and yet heads had turned and men had drooled at the sole beauty that was his goddess. It made his stomach churn and flutter at the same time, the sheer impression she implanted. But she looked absolutely the most stunning back in Norway, in the wood and stone cabin, around the mountain and the forest, he felt himself going back to the eternal nights with her on Asgard, it was her place, she looked utterly graceful in a palace, and breathtaking around Midgardians, but it was nothing like the nostalgic pure beauty she radiated in the lower profile life, and he wished to gift her that life and savor it with her, because she was his place.

She stirred besides him, and planted her face on his neck as her hand lazily went up his shoulder to find his hair and run it around her digits like pitch black waves flowing around her skin.

Your POV:

You felt Loki pull you closer, if that was even possible, he was holding onto you tight and lovingly, your hand running through his soft hair as you took in his scent, leather, some leftover cologne from yesterday, and him, home. You missed him so terribly every time you two fought, and in the countdown to war, fighting hurt even more, you didn't know what fears you'd have to face out there, you were hoping you were ready, a part of you knew you most probably were not.

Everything was so different here, and you constantly found yourself in a state of nostalgia, of missing, you missed your cabin, you missed the heavy humid mist of the mountain in the morning, you missed Narvi. Your heart longed to simply go back, spend the winter with Loki taking walks on the thick silent snow, but your mind knew there was a battle to fight, there was an old enemy to face, and it was thirsty for revenge.

You laid a kiss over his neck, and then another one, just to let him know you were awake, you felt him smile and hum, burying his nose in your hair. Loki and you were so different here as well, perhaps because you needed to be, you with your attitude correction, playing the mom as always, but him, this place, better said, these people, awoke something in him, the past most likely, he probably felt the need to wear a mask and keep a signature demeanor on, and a part of you liked it, a part of you likes the Loki that nuzzles his nose in your hair and hums as you kiss his neck.

-I don't like this place too much...- you mumbled against his neck.

-Hmm?- 

-I don't love how it makes us act...- you said with a small frown.

The way it made you act was a bit defensive, a bit too aggressive, like you have to keep a constant guard up, it was a bit exhausting and out of yourselves, even for him.

-I know darling...- he sighed, kissing the top of your head- I promise you, as soon as Thanos is stopped, you can go back to your tall trees and mountain mud...-

You tskd and slapped his shoulder playfully, there wasn't even that much mud in the mountains, almost everything was covered with luscious green. He chuckled against your hair and you shook your head, he couldn't see it but you rolled your eyes.

-Those tall trees and mountain mud became my home while i waited for you...- you warned.

He moved and changed your positions to roll your back onto the mattress, leaving him over you, he kissed down your temple and to your cheek.

-We'll be back my dear...and you can bake those blueberry pies you so like...-

See one of the things that made Loki irresistible, beyond the hand sculpted looking physique and the outstandingly charming character, was he paid incredible attention to detail, you had mentioned the blueberry pie once, and he already knew how much you loved it. You laughed softly.

-I only bake those pies when I'm mad at you...- you said in a soft tone.

-Ah, i see, that's a shame...- he said, his hands sliding up and down your sides and his kisses now on your neck- I would've loved to eat some off of you...-

You bit your lip, humming and melting under the low seductive music of his voice, he sucked and nibbled at your neck as you felt his hand stroke your thigh, going from the front to the inside and slowly down nearing your panties, your hand tangled on his hair again as the other one hugged his broad shoulders, you felt two fingers tease around at your underwear, and you bucked your hips, asking for more, already feeling your core dampening.

-So eager for me...my good girl...- he whispered, his mouth reaching your shoulder.

A small quiet moan rolled off of your lips, and you felt his hand under the hem of your panties and his fingers reaching your slit, your legs spread wider and wrapped around his hips, feeling his finger tips run up and down your folds, stroking through them, barely grazing your clit and teasing you, the touch so gentle and slow you were mewling already.

You heard three knocks on the door, you opened your eyes to look that way but closed them back again when Loki found your clit, drawing amazing patterns over it, you let out a little gasp and arched your back, he kept the movements slow and tempting, his free hand came up to knead at your breast and roll and pull on your nipple with his fingers, you whimpered and he growled, sucking at your neck intensely.

More knocking came through the door, this time a bit louder, Loki growled, this time a representation of his patience running low, you bit your lip and chuckled at this, he pinched your nipple hard as a warning and you almost yelped, except your mouth transformed it into a loud moan and it was his turn to chuckle.

-Loki! I know you're both in there because unfortunately I'm not deaf!!- 

It was Thor, he was at the other side of the door, you giggled uncontrollably in an attempt to not laugh out loud, Loki left your breast to grip at the pillow besides your head tight enough that it was left wrinkled and growled in pure frustration, he shot up the bed, leaving you naked and spread open for him under the sheets, you covered your chest as he walked up to the door and opened it furiously.

-If you do not want to hear then by all means be my guest and leave.- he snarled.

-Good morning to you too- Thor said, you couldn't see him but you knew he was probably smiling- Happy to see you two have made up...-

You heard Loki take a deep slow breath, but he didn't say anything, and so Thor continued.

-I come to inform you of something...-

-What in the nine realms could be so important?- Loki cut him off.

A short chuckle came out of you at the sexual frustration taking over Loki's speech.

-You'll be glad to hear your prayers have been answered, i am leaving, for a few days at least...- Thor said.

At this you got up, picking from the floor Loki's dress shirt from last night that had barely made it with it's buttons on, to be fair you almost didn't make it to bed for round 2. It was big enough to cover you up, you buttoned it almost all the way up and rolled up the too long sleeves as you walked to the door with a frown, looking up at Thor.

-Leaving where?- you asked.

-I'm going to find myself a new hammer, i will need one if i want to stand a solid chance against Thanos- 

-I thought your hammer wasn't the source of your power- you squinted.

-It is not, but it does help me concentrate it, and i think it is best if i concentrate in this battle- he raised his brows and smiled.

-Alright, and how does this concern us?- Loki tilted his head, his lips in a thin line.

-Yes, i need your help.- he stated- I have been working on an agreement to settle our people in Norway, it has finally come to terms and well, since time is allowing us, i thought it would be good for our people to finally have a more fitting place, i think it would bring them tranquillity...-

Loki's brow pinched, and you could tell he was thinking, so were you, yes they had agreed to settle the Asgardians, give them a new place to call home, but the timing could not be worse, who knew how long settling them would last, you were sure they must understand that right now there was a bigger "task" to be fulfilled, and that your time would be much better spent training and preparing for what was about to come.

-I know you two are wondering why now of all times...- he chuckled- But I'm afraid you'll have to trust me...-

Loki diverted his quizzical eyes at you, a brow raised, silently asking what you thought, you could feel the look on your peripheral view, but your eyes stayed on Thor, trying to figure out yourself what to do or say, and in Thor's face you saw a little something, a spark almost, that type of glow a child wears when they've got a little something up their sleeve, you squinted and wondered how Loki didn't recognize that look, he practically created that look. 

-Alright...- you started- And you want us to take care of installing the Asgardians?- you asked carefully.

-I would, yes- he smiled again.

Loki raised a brow.  
-Me and Sygin?- he asked.

-Well Heimdall will be with you but yes- he nodded.

-Wouldn't it be more convenient for Heimdall to accompany you?- Loki asked for both of you.

Thor hesitated at his answer, it seemed like he was getting cornered in his own secrecy, it wasn't that you didn't trust him, but it was a bit of an odd request and moment for said request, he was asking Loki and you, but most importantly Loki, to take control over the new accomodation of their refugees, refugees of a realm that Loki, the obvious black sheep of the family, supposedly loathed. But then again you took Thor's face in, he wasn't looking at you, he was exchanging an uncorresponded and slightly nervous smile with his brother, the trickster, and in his expression you reminded yourself that this was Thor, he loved Loki, he wanted the best for him, he wanted to give him a chance.

Your eye twitched and your cunning buzzed.

-Maybe but the Asgardians are fond of Heimdall- you said matter of factly, aiding Thor. When he looked at you, you gave him an almost unnoticeable smirk.

Loki scoffed then looked at you, you gave him a soft look with raised brows, a nod that everything seemed okay, he trusted your cunning, who wouldn't? You were always right after all.

-Right...when do we part?- he asked.

-Today! The sooner the better- another wide smile.

After a groan from Loki and an agreement to meet at the entrance for departure, Thor took off, there wasn't much to pack, but you still had a good few hours before leaving. Thor informed you of how New Asgard (lazy name as described by Loki) would be founded in Tonsberg, like you had talked about some time ago, this made you a bit more eager to go back, a sneaky but not unwelcomed smile tugging at the corners of your mouth as you brushed your teeth and thought of stepping back in the wooden floors of your cabin and hearing the kettle whistle as the water boiled by the kitchen window leading to the tall wave of emerald green that was the mountain.

-I'm beginning to think all you agreed for was to go back to that creaky humid cottage- he teased at your minds bridging.

You walked out of the bathroom to him as he was zipping up the last bag, he looked down at you and your hands ran up his chest to this collar and finally his jaw, holding it with both your thumbs and index fingers as you gifted him a small closed smile and stood on your tip toes to kiss him softly, he kissed you back just as slow, his hands encasing your waist to then wrap around it, you pushed your tongue in, moaning into his mouth, a sharp breath came in through his nose and you slowly broke the kiss.

-No, but if you come with me to the creaky humid cottage, you'll get to see me walk naked around it...-

He chuckled, short and wheezy. His nose trailed from your cheek to your temple, drawing his mouth to your ear.

-I can see you naked whenever i please darling, i don't need you to tempt me with it...-

Now it was your turn to chuckle, extended and playful, with a sigh at the end.

-Oh you will regret challenging me...- you whispered, playing with a black lock from his hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is embarrassing but, reading back i found quite a huge plot hole about the whole Asgardian refugees thing, I'm trying to fill it in with this because i came up with something that i actually liked so plz bare with me


	25. New Asgard

A cargo ship almost the size of a town had been stationed outside the compound waiting for you, besides it, the Guardians ship was also ready for departure, Thor and the Captain were seen standing and talking to each other in front of said ships as Loki and you made your way to them, everyone ready for departure. 

Mornings and days in this place seemed to be so dull to you, they didn't quite feel like anything, the scenery was plain and filled with the modern print of the Midgardians, perhaps that was why you didn't like it. With the mountains, the pines and the fog, you could connect, feel the buzzing of life around you, here that buzz felt beaten up by the noise and weight of the disrespectful presence of these people. You finally thought for the first time since Thor told you to this morning that it was probably around the right time for you to leave this place.

They turned to face you and the Captain's stance shifted from casual to serious, you could feel Loki stand a similar ground.

-Morning. Loki...Sygin- he nodded, you nodded back- The Asgardians will be settling in Norway, Thor put you both in charge for the next three days, after that you'll be meeting us in Wakanda, we'll be waiting there to finish preparing for battle when Thanos comes to us, we'll guard the Mindstone there. Hopefully we can separate it from Vision before he gets here.-

You squinted at the man in front of you.

-And you are okay with this sudden interruption of plans? You don't find it unnecessary?- 

-To be honest ma'am...- he said, turning to Thor- I am not, but i also simpatize with the need to put the people first and foremost.- he said with a curt nod and his chin up high.

Loki's eyes rolled so hard they could orbit the Sun, and you felt it in his loud, exasperated scoff and the way he walked away, you held back a grin and nodded the Captain goodbye as you followed the snarky teenager you had for a husband to your transport, where you found Heimdall and greeted him with a smile. You were placed in the long cockpit of the cargo ship, the refugees being aboard the back of it where the space was bigger, it had been a while since you'd seen your people, you wondered how they would react at Loki being left in charge, you knew they wouldn't recognize you, although you had been a princess and a queen to them at one point, you had never made your titles public, and you found just a bit of relief in that.

The ship grumbled and came to life, the engines roaring, through the cockpit window you saw Thor seated on the other ship right in front of you, Brunnhilde sitting besides him, he gave you a smile and a wave of his hand before taking off into the sky, and at a slower, but still fast speed, so did your own ship, making it's way to Norway. Home.

***

The deep green of the praires and mountains came to view, accompanied by a dark grey day with cold wind pushing the foamy waves to clash at the shore and the rocky cliffs, it was a dark, gloomy day. You smiled to yourself, already smelling the icy breeze that carried the scent of fog, ocean and forrest.

There was much to do, you realized this as the ship roared to a stop on the ground and you walked to the wide division of the ship where the Asgardians awaited for guidance to their new place of residence. Hundreds of hopeful eyes looking forward at you, putting their well-being and trust in you, but most importantly, in Loki. He had ruled two times back in Asgard, had it not been for his fall and then later redemption, maybe you'd be a lot more confident in the people reacting well.

You always thought Loki was fit to rule, he knew so, he was witty, smart, knew how to negotiate and speak publicly, and most importantly, he wanted to rule, not for the sake of battles like his brother did at one point, because he was a natural leader, although you knew he hated pity, many times had you wondered how good of a ruler Loki could've been, had it not been for the rocks life had thrown at him. But soon you learned that life threw those rocks with a purpose, and now that Loki had finally seen what really mattered, you could feel in him a renewed sense of his old worthiness for leadership.

Your cunning hummed at your thoughts, and you furrowed your brows, looking around and glancing shortly at him before coming back to the present.

Loki and you stood besides Heimdall on a platform with a wide throne like seat on the center, Heimdall turned to Loki.

-I believe they could use some words of assurance...- he tilted his head to him.

Loki turned to him with furrowed brows, and you mimicked this action with a less confused expression, if anything it lingered proud excitement, but you understood why Loki would be confused, yet his emotion quickly turned into eagerness as he looked around, now that was more like it. He briefly looked at you and raised a brow, you shrugged with a small closed smile, and he smirked.

-Asgard...- he begun, standing determined, but approachable, in a way- These are trying times we're living, our people have been through much, and now more than ever, we must stand together.- his tone showed sympathy, so did his gesture- Asgard isn't gone. It never is, not as long as we're alive.- he stated- Change can be difficult, but most times, necessary, it can be rejected, but can leave us feeling grateful. We must pull through, stand tall and rise from the ashes, for the people that are gone, and the people that will come.-

A sense of pride fluttered in your chest as you watched him speak, smiling to yourself, knowing his words were perfect and heartfelt, the small moment you took your eyes off of him, you saw heads nodding, some people tearing, most likely at the loss they had to face. You also felt sympathy for the people, sure you were never too fond of Asgards web of lies and secrets, but these people didn't know, and they had lost everything in one single atrocious day, and to that you could certainly relate.

Heimdall stepped forward, standing besides but slightly behind Loki, not stealing the sense of leadership he was giving off from him, giving the Asgardians a small glimpse of what their new life could be like, assuring them you'll be here for them to help them out through the process.

The cold in the air swept and intruded as the ramp from the ship opened to a new beginning, there were a few hesitant faces, they'd have to get used to the cold days and nights, back in Asgard the sun that hit the day was enough to make it warm, at night it would cold, here, the majority of days were just cold all throughout. You knew they'd have to get used to many things, just like you did, it would be a lengthy process for them, but now more than ever you felt like you could sympathize with your people, and you were ready to help them pull through.

It was a beautiful village, there were a number of houses and cabins prepared for the refugees to move into, they would probably have to occupy them by groups at first until more structures were built, but you thought maybe in that closeness they could find comfort. Heimdall, Loki and you separated a group of people willing to help distribute clothes suitable for the winter, water, and other goods. And so you went house by house and with an encouraging smile handed out these elements, and since you had the chance, your personal help as well.

-If you have any doubts, any fears or insecurities about this process, or you need something else, please don't hesitate to let me know. This is a big change, and you have been through a lot, and we all need to be there for each other...- you softly and genuinely explained to the current group you were with, they all nodded and thanked you in whispers.

You noticed a man in the back, his eyes looked tired and puffy, his gesture devoid of rest and life, dark circles around his eyes, he was holding a little girl in her arms. The look of children after they'd been through loss was incredibly upsetting, it washed uneasiness down your throat, they always looked distraught, but confused, like something had happened, they didn't know what, or when, they didn't understand how, but they knew it had happened, it was the dark, betraying, completely disgusting look of trauma.

She was looking at you with glinting eyes that had seen things she was too young to see, her small hand on a fist gripping at the man's clothes, you assumed that was his father, you didn't need your cunning to know, the turning of your stomach told you her mother was most likely dead. You held her gaze, shared it with her, just two young girls that had encountered fear and cruelty, the rest of the group had begun to walk back inside.

-Hi...- you whispered softly to her.

She held her father tightly, peeking over at you without answering, her brow pinched in shattered innocence.  
You swallowed and pressed your lips together, they needed you, they needed to know they were not alone, they needed hope.

In very soft and slow movements, you lowered yourself on the ground, your hand lifted and swayed above the humid grass, blue glow cascading from your palm and knuckles, a stem pulled up from the ground, growing and blooming into a bright yellow flower with soft round petals, you gently plucked it and stood back up, the little girl looked at it and then at you, her eyes now showing a tinge of surprise, you held it up for her, a small smile on your face, she looked at you and you cocked your head to the flower, urging her to take it.

Her small hand extended slowly and her father leaned closer for her to take it, once she held it on her hand her expression softened, she looked up at you again with eyes full of youth and pureness, her lips pursing very faintly into a smile as she leaned her head on the man's shoulder, caressing the petals with her fingers. When you glanced up at him, he was looking down at her daughter, holding her tight with love and protection, a small, quivering smirk had tugged on his mouth, and when his eyes lifted to meet yours, they glinted with tears.

-Thank you...- he said, slightly choked out.

You nodded once, almost a reverence.  
-Anything you need- you repeated.

He turned to walk inside their new home, you watched them leave, sighing, hoping you could help them, give them a sense of warmth and assurance, the little girl perked up from his shoulder to look at you, and waved.

You waved back, a closed smile on your face that she mimicked and hugged his dad's shoulder, a silent connection between you and her.

***

The hours went by and the sun was going down by the time you had settled the Asgardians with at least the basic needs for now, you stood at the edge of the village, going up the mountain looking from above at it, in the distance you could see and hear Loki discussing the assembly of different groups according to the skills the people possessed, the healers would probably be the most busy, you'd help them tomorrow.

You wanted to do as much as you could for them before you had to leave for battle, you hoped and prayed that everything would go well, that the fight would be rough but worth it, you tried finding reassurance in the number of warriors you'd have by your side, with the people from the country called Wakanda that seemed to be fond of the Captain and his "friend".

It was a pity that just now when you were finally starting to feel a true connection with your own kind it was the time to leave for such a battle, it was a pity that you were feeling this at such tense and risky times, the clock ticking above in the sky, a countdown marching to either the victory of your life, or your complete demise and that of the entire universe. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, the face of that little girl when you gifted her a sliver of happiness coming to your mind, you would win this, you would win this fight.

Whatever it takes.

The grass rustled with steps around you and you opened your eyes, Heimdall coming up the hill to you, he stood besides you and you gifted him a small closed smile as he looked around.

-I think you'll grow on them quite fast if you ask me...- he looked down at you.

-We'll be there for them...Hopefully we'll help them build home again.-

-You already are...- he said, cocking his head to Loki, who stood tall and concentrated as he gave each group a task to help and they listened intently, nodding.

Your smile grew.

-Those were some well picked words back there...- he raised a brow.

-He's always been good with words we both know that, it's like he was made for public speaking...- you smiled, Heimdall chuckled.

-Just like a true leader should be.- he smirked, looking forward.

Your cunning tugged at you, and your eyes squinted in suspicion as you turned your head to look up at him, he met your gaze with a raised brow.

-Do you know something i don't Heimdall?- 

He huffed a laugh.  
-You are one of the few people we cannot hide things from, and because of that, I'll let you figure it out- he tilted his head.

-Hmm- you simply said- We...- you thought out loud.

Thor.

-I promised myself to take a break from betraying my kings- Heimdall joked, you laughed with him.

-Old habits die hard Heimdall, don't make any promises- you told him, side eyeing him- Besides, kings shouldn't give you a reason to betray them.-

He looked down at you with what could be read as a proud grin.

-Spoken like a true leader...- he reiterated, looking ahead once again.

There was no pull from the cunning this time, but you didn't need it, there were hidden intentions here, Thor being suspiciously trusting with Loki, and even a bit eager for him to come here, literally putting him and you in charge while he was away, he could've given that responsibility to Heimdall, but he was here for different reasons, extra help, yes, but also, evaluation.

Evaluation of leadership, evaluation of hope and trust, evaluation of strength, evaluation of a king.

Realization came to you in the form of a smirk full of pride and joy, and you bit your cheek, you could tell why Heimdall could barely contain the secret, you already wanted to be there when it was out.

-New Asgard...- Heimdall said, his eyes settled on the village.

The words were a subtle confirmation, your smile growing wider, watching Loki take care of his people, watching him lead.   
A breeze ran around the tall grass of the mountains, dancing with it, creating a calming whispering tune as you pondered on your discovery, imagining Loki standing where you always pictured he deserved to be, your joy didn't only correspond to the image of your husband smiling with lighten up eyes that shone with happiness, but also at the proof that Thor trusted him again.

-When did the king take this decision?- you sparked curiosity once again.

-Would you like me to tell when i knew he had, or when he said he had?- 

-Are your eyes yellow?- you teased, he laughed.

-It was when he found out about you.- he stated softly, you looked at him with furrowed brows, and he continued- It's every time he sees his brother around you, in the way he looks at you he sees a spark of who his brother used to be, a spark he hadn't seen in so long, it gave him the hope he needed. And in that hope he thought of this decision, he came to me, he asked me if it was possible i saw that same spark, and i did. I always did, but this time, i am proud to say i saw a permanency in this spark...-

Your gesture relaxed, listening to his words. A question stuck in your mind, pushing to get out, a question your cunning urged you to ask.

-Do you think that this spark is dependable on my presence?-

-No.- he stated- I think that spark had been waiting to resurface for a while now...It was close when he ruled Asgard, before Hela came back...- he explained- And it finally lit up when he came back to you, you are the final push, you are a motivation, but inside Loki, you are a spark of your own, maybe even a star.- he smiled fondly.

A feeling you hadn't felt in a while came to you, your heart felt flustered, you felt happy and even honored, special to be light for him, light that helped urge his own back out the surface after being shoved into the darkest pit of his beaten iron heart. As you looked around everywhere and everything, as you took in the moment, you let the circumstances of the present dim for a while, relishing on this small moment of anticipation for what was around the corner, for once looking around at a place called Asgard and finding that if the care of those people were in your hands, if the crown were to be offered to you again then, well, you might take it this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters may take longer to write since we're nearing the end, but thank u so much for the love, and don't forget to leave sum kudos! ❣️❣️


	26. Sleep

While you walked up the mountain to your home, Loki spoke of starting constructions tomorrow, he was sure with both your powers combined you could most definitely build at least three houses to accommodate more people. You simply smiled to yourself as you listened to him, looking around and noticing how it was about to start snowing.

When you did get to the house, you took a deep and content breath, and let it out in a relieved and satisfied sigh, letting yourself drop on the couch as Loki hung his coat and started a fire. He sat next to you, leaning back with his legs spread, blue eyes clashing with the warm hue of the fire, he turned to look at you and patted his thigh, instructing you to sit. You rolled your eyes and smiled playfully, moving to position your legs over his and sit on his lap, you snuggled up to him, sinking into his broad chest as he wrapped an arm around your waist.

-That was a great speech you gave today- you said, nuzzling your head below his jaw.

-Hmm...- 

Even though he didn't say much and you couldn't see his face, you felt the faint smirk tug at his lips, and he caressed your side.

-Heimdall thought so too...- you smiled, trying to find ways to let out your pride without letting anything slip.

-Did he now?- he asked, almost sarcastically, and also a bit surprised.

You lifted your head to look at him, his pale skin tainted golden with the flames on the fireplace, his eyes standing out above the sharp cheeks.

-Yes, you know he cares about you...-you gave him a soft gaze, he hummed again.

-He was better at caring than my father ever was- he almost murmured.

The hand that wasn't rested around your waist came up to lightly stroke at your jaw, he looked down at you with gentle eyes, and you let yourself fall and melt against his body, your eyelids starting to feel heavy at the feather touch of his fingers, you realized how tired you felt after walking around offering your help and support all day.

-I feel like i finally connect with them Loki...- you lifted your eyes to his, he held your gaze- I want to help and guide them, now that i can sympathize with what they've been through...- he gave you a very small closed smile, but you frowned at your own intentions- Is that selfish?-

-My darling...you are the least selfish person i know, had it not been for your battle skills i could bet you wouldn't dare kill a fly...- he said innocently.

You tskd at him, rolling your eyes and pretending to be mad, but he quickly dismissed it with a chuckle, lifting your chin with his fingers to place a slow tender kiss on your lips, his thumb circled your chin and he hummed, conjuring a spell on you with his actions that you let enchant your lips, tilting your head to lay on his shoulder as they danced with yours delicately. The hand that was encasing your waist lifted your sweater, sliding underneath to grasp and caress the skin, moving up slowly, you smirked to yourself, he took it as encouragement and kept stroking up until he reached your breasts, he started to push you down slowly onto the couch when you shook your head and pulled away. He gave you a quizzical look.

-Remember this morning...- you said, kissing his lip's commissure- When you said you could see me naked whenever you pleased?- your tone was suggestive, laying another kiss over his lips.

This time you were the one conjuring the spell, running the tip of your finger along his jaw as you whispered with velvet voice and pressed your chest to his, he hummed, signaling he did remember.

-Well you see...- you sat up, your index and thumb holding his chin- Sex means I'll be naked...- you pursed your lips pretending to think- And I don't want that now-

-Hmm...- he looked up at you, seeing your little game- And do you remember how i told you...- he leaned over to plant paused kisses on your neck- That i could see you naked whenever i pleased?-

You chuckled. He was determined yes, but you were stubborn, even with the pulsing between your legs, there was no way you were undressing, even less having sex with him, he challenged you, and you took it seriously, both of you did. His kisses became slower, more delicate, until he reached the spot below your ear, where he hummed and breathed in your scent, his nose tickling at your skin, tracing up until he reached your ear.

-I know your body too well my dear, the way it responds to my touch...- his hands trailed up and down your sides- I know you want to give in, i know you want my fingers, and my mouth, all over you...-

You were straddling his legs now, listening to him whisper low and gruff on your ear, trying to maintain steady breaths, you wouldn't budge, not tonight, but that didn't stop him from being absolutely charming.

-Mmm, that's nice, but you're wrong...- you half sung.

-Am i now?- you felt him smirk maliciously- If i were to slide my hand in between these gorgeous thighs... How wet would you be?-

Dripping wet, you could feel it, could feel how slick your folds were getting, and how your clit already begged for attention, thinking of his long fingers playing with it, flicking it around, you breathed in and huffed out a fake laugh.

-Oh don't flatter yourself Lokes, you'd be disappointed at the results...Maybe even a little embarrassed.- your tone was pouty, almost mocking.

The encasing of your waist became a grip, his jaw clenched slightly against your neck, he was getting irritated now, the nickname and the mockery getting to him.

-Careful with your words, or I'll make sure you choke on them.- he hissed on your ear.

Your lips stretched in a malicious smile, and you angled your face enough to have your mouth right next to his ear, taunting him.

-I'd love to see you try...-

He growled into your ear, the grip of his hands became harsh, he dug his fingers in your ribs and in a harsh movement he pushed you off of him, sliding you onto the floor in what resulted on you kneeling between his legs, you yelped as your knees hit the floor, already feeling you blood pumping faster as you looked up at him again, his hand snatching your jaw and squeezing.

-You have a nasty little mouth you know that don't you?- 

Your mouth opened to throw another snarky response but his hand left your jaw and gathered your hair, pulling hard and making you gasp, your center tingling with the pleasure of pain. His eyes were on yours, pupils spread and pooling onto his irises as the white around them seemed to turn into fog, his mouth parted in a satisfied evil snarl, your heard the shuffling of fabric and looked down where his hand was undoing his pants.

-Open.- 

You looked up again and opened wide for him, tongue sticking out and all, your own eyes becoming fogged as well, your clit pulsing, he spat into your mouth and pulled away slightly, your hair still on a tight hold.

-You don't want me to see you naked? Fine. You're gonna put that filthy mouth to good use, you're gonna learn to respect me.- 

His mouth tugged up into a snarl as he spoke, his voice dark like his eyes, digging into yours, making your breathing hitch and your insides shiver, your eyes now doe and wide, waiting for his next instructions, you placed your hands on his thighs as he leaned back on the couch.

-Suck.- he ordered.

You felt your mouth already watering, your eyes fell down to his cock, big and hard and waiting for your mouth to be wrapped around it, he tugged at your hair and guided you forward and down, you tilted your head, leaving a trail of wet kisses up and down his shaft before wrapping your lips around the tip, starting to take him in, sucking lightly trying to keep a little upper hand by teasing him, your eyes went back up, this time with a look of defiance.

He simply chuckled, twisting his wrist to tighten the hold on your hair, and forced your head down onto his cock while bucking his hips up, you shut your eyes, your nose crushing against his lower stomach, the tip hitting your throat unexpectedly and making you gag, you felt tears slowly pricking at your eyes. He snatched your head back by your hair, pulling you away from his dick, a rope of spit stretching as your mouth lost contact with it.

-Are you going to continue being a bitch, or will you take my cock like a good whore?- he looked down at you, the only evidence of pleasure being his relaxed jaw.

You panted a bit, swallowing the leftover spit that pooled at the bottom of your mouth, meanwhile, at the bottom of your panties wetness also pooled through them, but you wouldn't give in, you wouldn't plead for him to satisfy you, so you settled for a nod, of course that wasn't enough. 

-Yes what?- 

-I'll be good...- you said in a thin voice.

He smirked down at your submission, and this time you didn't need guidance, your mouth found his cock and took it in, sucking hard at the tip and going down, your tongue swirled around the head and that earned you a groan from him, his hips bucking up to join your rhythm and ask for more, your hands gripped at his thighs as you leaned forward to take him deep in your throat, containing a gag and breathing harshly through your nose, he moaned and you tried to pull away, only to be stopped by his grip on your hair holding you down on his cock.

You looked up at him, fluttering your lashes, trying to keep your mouth on him and suck as hard as you could, spit dripped down your chin and coated his shaft, his grip loosened letting you breathe, you came up to be able to breathe and sucked at the head while your hand moved to stroke hard at the base, your cheeks hollowed and you bobbed your head, he let out a gruff moan, looking down at you meeting your eyes, you only focused on sucking him hard, your tongue rubbing and pressing over the head licking off any drop of precum that formed.

-Good girl, suck it hard...- he growled between breaths, his hand left your hair to fall loose and came to cup your jaw, thumb caressing it as you sucked and jerked him off.

You gave his length another long wide lick up and down and took it in your mouth again, your hand sliding down to cup and tease his balls on your hand, he groaned and grunted, laying his head back as his hand came up to your head to pet you like a purring kitten as your tongue went around his cock. Thighs pressed tightly under you to gain some type of pressure, deciding how much pride you'd have to swallow if you decided to give in and let him have you, his legs tensed and bucked up, urging you to take more, and you were happy to oblige, hollowing your cheeks and picking up speed.

His thighs tensed under your hand, he grunted and moaned in response, his orgasm evidently near as you pressed your tongue on the underside of the head, the hand on your jaw pulled you away from it, your jaw fell slack as you gasped for a full breath of air. His cock was throbbing and veiny in his hand as he pumped it slowly, it was very much evident he was on the edge, and you looked at him quizzically before he placed the tip over your bottom lip and you understood, swiping your tongue underneath it.

His jaw tightened and his mouth barely parted as he grunted through gritted teeth, you batted your lashes at him, your tongue tentatively holding the very tip of his cock, waiting for his cum. After only a few more fast strokes he came undone inside your mouth, white hot ropes of cum splashed on your mouth except for one that shoot up to your cheek, his hand gripped at your jaw, preventing you from swallowing.

When he was done spilling himself on you, his head fell back with heaving breaths and his shoulders shook with the start of a low and growly chuckle, then he sat straight and looked down at you, your clit was literally beating and you were sure your panties were drenched.

-Show daddy that filthy mouth full of his cum.- he cocked his head, commanding you.

The words sent a single spark of electricity right to your core, you opened wider, his seed pooling on your tongue, bitter and salty. His eyes moved over your face, looking down to your mouth before moving up and settling on your eyes, then your face entirely, in his own hungry eyes you imagined what you looked like, eyes hazy and teary, looking up at him innocently, cheeks red and mouth wide open with white cum filling it up.

-Such a good little whore, and all for me...- his thumb rubbed on your cheek-You can swallow now.-

He let go of the hold on your jaw and you swallowed him down, wiping your cheek with your finger and sucking on it as well before you yawned, half from the soreness of Loki's cock in your mouth, and half from the day draping over you, his fingers encased your chin and you looked up at him, he kissed you tenderly.

-Should we get you to bed?- he murmured against your lips.

You hummed and nodded, watching him smirk and help you up before leading you to the bathroom where you washed your face, you walked out and flopped onto the mattress, stretching around the covers before Loki kneeled at the edge of the bed to take your shoes off, kissing your ankles.

-Should i add foot fetish to the list?- you joked.

He chuckled with you and walked around, sliding into the opposite side of the bed, you dragged yourself to lay over him, clinging to his side and resting your head over his chest, his arm tugged at the blankets and covered you both with them, you hugged his waist, then felt him kiss the top of your head, and you sunk into deep sleep.

***  
Gasping for air your body jolted up in bed, almost falling off the mattress, your ears imploding in sharp pain stinging down your jaw, your cunning pulled and knotted and whipped at your head, your eyes were hazy and hot, fighting against the excruciating pain at the need to look around for safety, you whimpered at this pain, this burning, this throbbing and stinging that cut your breaths in half, there was pain, and blood, heat and cold, you forced your eyes to open, to look down.

There was nothing.

Your eyes blinked profusely, irritation gritting your teeth at the lack of focus your dilated pupils were providing you with, pants beating out of your lungs, your lips dry but your mouth salivating, once your eyes finally gave view to your body under you, you watched your arms untwist from around your stomach, trembling, fingers a lingering and light shade of purple you weren't sure if it was real. Inside you your blood slowly started pumping slower again, your heart wasn't thumping anymore, eyes twitching around, trying to find what you saw, what you felt, those foreign yet very real feelings your vision had suffocated you with.

You remembered the slow, painful passing of the glow in lifeless eyes. Eyes you knew.

Your face turned, slow as if fighting its own movement, scared to see anything. Loki laid on his side, your soulmate, the sight and the memory caused so much fear and agony in the very core of yourself that you whimpered, lips parted and curled in a plead.

He stirred under the covers with a frown, you were starting to assimilate everything to the sight of him when his eyes fluttered, before they could open tour hand swiped over fast.

-Sleep.- you whispered with your cunning.

His brow relaxed, and his eyelids settled down, drawing him back to a peaceful deep rest. You took in the sight with deep breaths, looking down at him, feeling your entire world resting in between the black silk of his hair, matching your breathing with his in an attempt to feel them, to share them forever. Your fingers lowered onto his jaw, slowly and with care, your hand so dead still your thumb felt like it had a life of his own when it swiftly caressed his skin.

The sadness in your eyes shifted and mixed with sympathy, or was it pity? Just how different can those two be? You turned around, dragging your drained body out of bed like you were controlling it, but not leading it, instead it slowly took you out of the bedroom, guided by the never dying entity whose visions fell striking and unstoppable.

You lit a lamp in the living area, there was silence except from the last faint cracklings of the dying fire Loki had set up before, it was still nighttime, you noticed, the bare soles of your feet feeling the cold wood as you stood looking around, simply needing to stand away from the heavy air filled with the remnants of your vision. 

It was almost as if you were waiting for the instruction of your cunning, thinking how you could possibly keep going after what it had shown you, eyes wide open staring at the lamp, Loki's resting face unfolding in your sight again, you closed your eyes with a huff, and your cunning buzzed with your actions as you looked for what you needed in between the books, paper, and a pencil left besides the lamp.

Visions were unstoppable, but as the pencil circled over the paper, you found the smallest bit of solace in your own words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ: I've been having a hard time writing this fic tbh, between stress, finals and writer's block, it's been tough, somedays i feel like i should unpublish it and start over, i think I could've done a lot of things way better, this is my first ever fic and it's very special to me, i love the idea but I can't help but feel like it's not very good...But i promise anyone still reading that I’ll finish it ❤️


	27. The Last Few Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: heavy, and i mean real heavy, smut, be mindful, there is also smut.  
> TW: humiliation, belt whipping, knifeplay. If any of these affect you stop reading at the ♥️ and resume reading when it appears again.

Next morning, though your head was buzzing and your heart was pounding with a slow thump in your chest, you forced yourself to acceptance, moving on from the inevitable, pushing it aside, there were more important things to do, for example...babies.

There were a number of new born babies that needed urgent care and supervision, along with a few pregnant mothers who needed to be checked on.  
Loki came with you as well, not to help you, you were sure he wouldn't totally be up for that, but to be present, he was positive he needed to be, specially around people who needed medical attention, although most of them did.

You hoped your skills as a healer weren't as rusty as you thought they might be, you treated Loki a while ago but babies did not have a healing factor.

-Morning!- you heard Heimdall as you walked in the direction of the first house to visit.

-Morning Heimdall- you smiled- Any news from Thor?-

-Not really, but do not worry, he will be here just in time for battle- he assured, your stomach churned.

-I bet he wouldn't miss it for the world...- Loki mocked.

You slapped his arm playfully but smiled, the morning air was cold and silent, the only sound your breathing and the rustling of the gravel stone under your boots, Heimdall and Loki shared a few words about the schedule for today as you approached the first house, around 12 feet away from the entrance a girl rushed out of the door, a worried look on her face as she whipped her head around before her wide eyes landed on you and she came running.

-Help!! Please please help!!!-

The girl gripped on your clothes and you looked down at her before looking back up to the house. She was panting desperately, clearly scared and confused, overwhelmed to the brim of tears, you crouched down to her height.

-Hey, hey, look at me darling, look at me...-

-No no!!! Please help!!! I need a healer, my mom, my brother i...- her breaths were hoarse and forced, her chest heaving, she gripped at your clothes.

You couldn't leave without calming her, she would fall unconscious if her distress kept building up, you grabbed her face and caressed it with your thumb, her skin was tanned and her eyes were a deep green, glinting with tears.

-Honey, look at me, let's breathe, watch me- you said so softly and started taking deep slow breaths to let her follow you.

She slowly took shaky breaths, each a bit calmer than the other, her brows still furrowed in concern, when her breathing had significantly calmed you gave her a small smile.

-Alright now, tell me, is your mother hurt?- 

-No but she's in pain- she said in a high and worried voice.

You had a good guess of what was going on, your cunning buzzed.

-Is your mother pregnant? Is that the brother you're talking about?- 

She nodded quickly, her eyes wide as you spoke the explanation she was trying to give you, her mother was giving birth.

-Is she alone in there?-

-No- she shook her head- My papá is there, and so is my grandpapa, but they don't know how to help her- tears gathered in her eyes again.

-That's okay, that's okay- you assured- I can help your mother okay? But i need you to wait outside alright? Can you do that for me?-

You couldn't ask her to go back inside with you, there will most likely be screaming, and blood, and lots of stress, and she couldn't take it, not now, it was better if she stayed outside with some fresh air. You offered her your hand and she took it, squeezing tightly as you walked to the entrance, Loki trailing behind you, you looked down at the little girl.

-What's your name sweetheart?-

-Amira...- she said shyly.

-Okay Amira, I'm gonna be inside helping your mother, but Loki is gonna keep you company while I'm gone okay?- you casually pointed to the tall pale man besides you.

Amira turned to him, and when you did so too you found a taken aback, wide eyed Loki, you knew he didn't want to, but you needed him to, he was gonna have to suck it up. He looked at you like you just commited treason and simultaneously like he was screaming for help.

-I need to go with her mother, she's giving birth- you explained to him.

-And can't the infant go with you??- he half whispered.

-Loki! She's afraid, it'll only for a while, she needs someone to be with her- 

-I can call Heimdall- he gestured with his arm, his pose that of a child throwing a tantrum.

-Oh come on you big baby, you're a God you can take care of a child- you cocked a brow.

You gestured Amira to stay with Loki and she grabbed onto his wrist, clinging to him, you figured a tall brooding man could be scary to her, but also protective, you were glad she felt the later.

-I can't do this! Sygin!!- again, he half whispered as to not scream in front of the girl.

-You can, and you will, I'll be back, be good- you gave him a warning look as you ran inside the house.

Loki's POV:

He watched his wife run through the door and disappear, leaving him, the God of Mischief, with a little girl to babysit. What was she thinking? He couldn't do this, he didn't want to.

He looked down at the small child, she looked up at him shyly, almost waiting to see what they did, his eyes twitched around her face, scanning it, he tried thinking back to when he was a child himself, what he liked to do, he liked to read, and mess with Thor, practice his magic, he wondered if she had the gift.

-Are you king Thor's brother?- she asked slowly.

Oh this is wonderful.

-Yes.- he said, huffing through his nose.

-You don't look like him...- she curled her lip in slight surprise.

Loki sighed audibly, closing his eyes to arm himself with patience.

-No i don't, do you read?- he asked, hoping the answer would be yes.

-No...-

-Do you practice magic?-

-No-

All heavens above.

He huffed again, giving up, that was all he had, she didn't have siblings, the only one was being born right now, Loki felt the child cling onto his side.

-Right, well...what do you enjoy doing?-

The small girl looked around while thinking.

-I like to play with my dad, and we used to watch the stars and find different shapes in them...- 

Loki looked around, almost waiting for someone to come aid him, and the little girl tugged at his wrist, he looked down at her.

-Is my mom gonna be okay?- she looked up at him with big round green eyes.

His brow softened, his mouth pressed into a thin line, so much innocence, so naive, poor little girl, had still to experience life.  
Loki didn't know a thing about childbirth, except it was rather painful, she was waiting for an answer, he looked back at the house, he knew his Sygin would do everything in her power to help the mother.

-She will be fine...- he looked down at her- Sygin is a good healer- he nodded.

-Is she your girlfriend?- she asked, shuffling her feet a little, she was so tiny.

-She is my wife...- 

The girl let go of him, giggling before she fiddled with her tiny fingers, were his fingers also that small when he was a child?

-She's very pretty- she smiled up at him, her teeth were also tiny- Do you think she's pretty?-

He furrowed his brows, as if that was the most insulting, stupid question someone had asked him, but he let it slide, children tended to ask obvious questions, he guessed.

-Of course i do- he told her.

She giggled again, covering her mouth, Loki's brows raised in surprise and confusion at the reaction, but there was a small, very faint smile tugging at his stern lips at the sweet sound of the child's entertainment.

He wasn't really used to people, specially children, having a positive reaction towards him, they would usually shrink at the sight of his always present stern frown, with sharp cheekbones, pale skin and pitch black hair, he didn't exactly look approachable, he knew this, and he didn't really cared. He guessed with children there was always a possibility opened by the purity of a young mind, still yet to be influenced by knowledge and opinions, there was always a chance to be better with a child.

Maybe they are not so terrible.

-Do you know what Amira means?- he told her, finally lighting up with something to say.

The little girl shook her head.

-It means princess- he said.

-How do you know that?- she asked, keen to know.

Loki tried thinking of an answer that would be interesting to her, instead of going into detail about the linguistics of the name.

-Well i am a prince...- he tilted his head, cocking a brow.

-Because king Thor is your brother? And he's the king?- she said slowly, taking her time to piece together the question logically.

Loki took a deep breath.

-Yes.- his tone went back to usual.

She nodded looking up at him, her head falling back due to the vast height difference, she then turned to look over to the house.

-I'm excited I'm getting a brother- she smiled, her hands clasped together.

-Really?- Loki said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

-Yes, it'll be nice to have someone to play or talk with- she looked at him again briefly.

Loki looked down at her, or better said the top of her head, he wondered if Thor had asked for a sibling before Odin came back home with a kidnapped baby in hands, surely he also must've thought Loki could be someone he could fight with, that he'd enjoy it as much as he did, instead Loki was always different.

-And what if he doesn't want to play with you? What if he likes to be alone?- Loki furrowed his brows.

She pursed her lips, looking up at him, her expression mimicking his.

-Nobody likes to be alone, my mom says nobody should be.- she explained- And if he doesn't want to play with me, that's okay i guess, maybe i can play with him!- she shrugged.

Her lips tugged into another smile, a glint of a young star in her eyes, she was so vivid and positive, not a single dark thought or corrosive emotion inside that body, he couldn't tell if he felt pity for her, or if he was jealous. His first instinct was that she was wrong, there were people who liked to be alone, like him, then he thought of her, his companion, his soulmate, there was no scenario where he would actually rather be alone than be with her, so maybe Amira's mom was right.

-That is very nice Amira...- Loki acknowledged softly, admiring her optimistic take on life, though deep down he knew, but suddenly feared, all the realities he knew she'd be presented with.

Your POV:

You pushed the heavy door of the house with your open palm, opening your mouth in a smile to introduce Amira to her little brother, when you found her you took a second to admire Loki talking with the child, he didn't look thrill by her conversation, but he was certainly trying to be polite, or nice, though nice was such a curious adjective to use on Loki. When you approached and cleared your throat to catch their attention, his eyes let a faint sense of relief pass down to yours.

-Would you like to meet your brother Amira?- you smiled at her, further opening the door.

When the little girl didn't let go of Loki's hand, instead dragging him inside with her, your eyes widened in surprise as Loki's had, he looked to you for an explanation, or maybe some help, but shortly after the girl beamed up at him as they walked together, he seemed to relax and walk besides her.

You followed behind, still not completely processing the picture in front of you, Loki Odinson holding the dainty hand of a short girl, even cutting his long strides to small steps to match her speed absentmindedly. She guided him up to her mother's room, where you stepped forward and walked in, the tired woman laid peacefully on her bed, her husband by her side caressing her hand, her eyes fluttered open and saw Amira, flashing her a tired but reassuring smile.

Loki let her hand go when you picked up the newborn boy to crouch next to his sister, leaning in to show her.

-Amira, this is Frode...- the father said softly.

Behind her you saw Loki walk closer carefully, taking a look at the baby as well, when you looked up to face him his lips were parted as his eyes roamed around the baby.

-He's beautiful!- Amira beamed in happiness- How's mamá?- she diverted her gaze to the bed where her mother stirred.

-Your mother needs to rest Amira, she's done a great amount of effort...- her father explained.

At the mention of her she opened her eyes to smile at her husband, as she turned to talk to her daughter, her eyes met the towering figure of Loki, they widened and she tried to sit up straight, not in fear or shock, but out of respect.

-Oh dear, why did no one tell me i was receiving the Prince in my quarters, I would've made myself more presentable...- she ran a hand through her messy hair, blushing.

Loki brought up a relaxed hand at her statement and gifted her the smallest of smiles. You stood up slowly as to put the baby back down to rest, Loki came closer as you did, stopping your actions to look down at the child, you smiled up at his curious and evaluating expression, and when he caught you his lips tugged with a small closed smile, the blue in his eyes soft over your face. He looked at the baby once more before lifting his hands hesitantly.

-Can i...hold him?- he asked, though you weren't sure if he was talking to you or the mother, she nodded her head when you looked at her.

-Alright...careful, hold his head- you slowly gave the small, carefully wrapped boy to him.

He held the back of his head with the palm of his hand, though it was so big if he were to close his fingers around the head as well they would touch the baby's forehead, and you simply watched, entranced and surprised by Loki's stern glare slowly turning into a soft gaze as his eyes twitched over the baby's head, you secretly hoped your minds would bridge in that moment to see if he was thinking what you thought he was thinking, the darker part of you didn't wish to know.

-It is good for you to be so close to the people.- you both turned at the woman's words- It builds trust, and sympathy...- she smiled.

She carried a wise predisposition as she spoke, even for a young woman, still, you thought, you were also wiser than your age let on, you were guessing she, like you, had seen and lived a lot. You agreed with her, and you were sure Loki did as well, it would be negligent and even cruel to not walk besides the people during these times, and you were more than up to do so.  
The sounds of the baby waking up startled Loki a little, he looked at him as his small round hands stretched to the sides and his brows pinched in the beginning of a cry.

-Oh, someone's up, and I'm guessing hungry...- you slowly took the baby from Loki's arms and laid him in his mother's, the father leaned closer smiling at his newborn son.

-Thank you...- the father said genuinely.

You left after that, Loki gave them a half bow as a farewell and Amira waved at him with a smile he returned with a smirk and a head bow, he was such a royal, you guessed he missed it, but still you found yourself chuckling at it at the end of the day as you got ready for bed.

-Something entertaining?- you heard Loki walk into the room as you closed the dresser drawer.

You only turned halfway to face him, and with a teasing smirk you mimicked his bow in an exaggerated movement, giggling when you came back up.

-Ah, i see...you think my manners are funny?- he tilted his head, giving you a glare.

-I do...- you teased, smirking.

His eyes narrowed on you, you already knew where he thought this was headed, and although your body wanted it, you hushed it as Loki made his way closer to you, you were not about to give in, but he wasn't about to give up.

He stood in front of you, posture so straight his chest brushed yours and shoulders so broad it felt like looking up a wall, your head was already angled to look up at him when his fingers came up to lightly hold your chin, eyes trained on your lips only to snap up at your eyes with an intensity in them that took your breath away.

-I do like your giggles.- his thumb parted your lips, eyes shooting with icy blue- But I'd rather have you moaning...-

You cursed him inside your head, the hoarse low grumble of his voice making you shudder, you tried your hardest to contain yourself.

-What a shame you won't be doing that tonight...- your voice came a lot softer than you wanted it to.

A sinful glint took over his dilated pupil and tugged a smirk from his lips.

-I think it's fair to say...- his thumb barely went into your mouth, pressing down your warm tongue and sliding out again- That i don't need to have you naked to make you moan...-

Your eyes fluttered in an effort to keep them from rolling to the back of your head, he was so close all you could take in was his incredible scent, his hold on your chin so perfectly put it left your mouth open in a naive gesture, looking up at him.

-Prove it.- you managed to say, ignoring how it sounded like a plea.

He barely grinned before chuckling, a short, but heavy sound that echoed in your mind, swirling right down your body to the wetness under your panties, just like the rest of his words were.

-No. I have something better in mind for you my dear...- he whispered, but that didn't take the lust out of it.

♥️

His fingers let go of your chin only for his dagger to be manifested and replacing them, holding your chin up, the pointy tip barely pressing against your neck, now your breaths were deeper, your body still as you crumbled and trembled over the cold shining metal. 

-Do you remember our safe word darling?- you nodded slowly.

-Embers-

He lifted the dagger and tapped it over your mouth, you opened, understanding his actions, and the blade slid inside, pressing with the flat side over your tongue, only to slowly glide out and down your bottom lip and chin.

-That pretty little mouth...- he grumbled, you could feel your knees about to buckle under the heavy air he provided with his stare.

The blade slid down your throat and collarbones, making you gulp with adrenaline, he wouldn't hurt you, not unless you wanted to, but never enough to do any real harm, still you loved the risk. It reached your heaving chest and hooked at the neck of your top, his eyes finally let go of their pull on yours, falling down the where the sharp blade pressed, in a quick move he slashed down the fabric.

-You weren't too fond of that were you my dear?- an evil smile stretched on his face.

The blade cut through the sleeves, slashing them in clean cuts, the torn fabric fell from your shoulders and left you on your bra, which didn't last much either before he cut through the elastic between your breasts, making it spring open, he dragged the straps off of you with the tip of the dagger as well and so in a few clean movements you were half naked in front of him, nipples hardening as the cold metal caressed over them and down your ignited skin.

He reached the hem of your shorts, carefully sliding the blade in cutting towards the outside from the elastic at the top to the seam in between your thighs, the dagger so sharp it didn't take much effort to do so. As he hooked a finger to pull down what was left of the bottoms, he came closer, close enough that your deep breaths collided with his chest.

All that was left were your panties, wet and hot against your sex, the pointy tip of the knife drew a line up your mid thigh to your center, and pressed flat over the lace fabric, moving down against your mound, making you shudder. Loki leaned down to you, his nose rubbing down your temple and to your cheek, he took in your scent, sniffing slowly like a wolf at fresh meat, at this point your knees were shaking.

-I can have you whenever i please, however i please, is that understood?- he grumbled against your cheek.

You nodded slowly, your eyes fluttering with lust and submission as you searched for his. He lifted his head, his face still so close his lips barely grazed yours.

-Good girl.- he said low and slow- Get on the bed. On all fours.-

You blinked a few times before moving, taking your surroundings in again as if you had forgotten where you were. Your feet took slow steps towards the bed and climbed on it just as slowly, you knew he was watching your every move, and so you gave him a show as you positioned yourself, when you heard his slow steps approaching you waited and felt a chill ran through our spine as his hand caressed up the back of your thigh to your butt, understanding what was on his mind, you lowered your torso down against the mattress, leaving your ass high up for him, he chuckled.

-Suddenly so eager to please...- his fingers caressed your ass cheek softly- When will you learn, you can't deny me what's mine. Doesn't matter how strong you want to seem, you'll always give yourself to me like the little slut you are, won't you now?-

You gulped, his words and his touch in the cold night made your cunt spasm around nothing, your body giving him the obvious answer to his question, though he was clearly searching for words as he landed a hard and loud smack on your ass that made you gasp.

-Won't you now?- he repeated, a bit more stern.

-Yes.- you meant to snap but your voice quivered.

His hand left your skin, already starting to buzz with the stimulation, and you heard rustling, a drawer opening and what sounded like a buckle, your breathing picked up with anticipation at what you knew was coming, your cunt dripping through your thin panties. 

There was silence, and then another loud smack, not from his hand, but from a belt, stinging at your skin and leaving heat to rise to the surface, you moaned in pain and pleasure, and that gained you another smack, and then another, two on each side, the skin hot and buzzing, by the time Loki was done whipping you, you had lost count after the fourth smack on the right cheek, and you were panting and clenching, legs trembling.

Like a cool balm, his hands rubbed over the most likely red skin, and you hummed thankful, though you knew he was just getting started. 

-Lay on your back.- he commanded.

Your entire lower body shuddered in a mixture of heat, lust and stinging pain, Loki's eyes never left your body, he was methodical, looking you up and down to see what punishment he could lay upon you next for defying him, and you laid there at his mercy, anticipating with a dripping pussy and excitement.

His right hand lifted only slightly an twisted, bringing your arms up over your head to leave you tied up to the headboard. No not tied, but chained, you were chained to the headboard, you bit back a smile.

Always so dramatic.

His eyes snapped back up at you with a scowl and another whip from the belt hit right across your breast, it was clear your minds had bridged and he heard that, your body squirmed and you gasped, looking up at him with shock for a moment.

-Oh don't look surprised now, you know you love it.- he narrowed his eyes at you- Go ahead, ask for more.-

Your eyes fell on him for a second, your un restrained legs pressing together for relief, your attention was caught by the pressing bulge against his pants, and you bit your lip.

-Please your highness, give me more...- you pleaded.

His jaw clenched with a bubbling growl at his throat followed by a smack at your ribs, you only moaned, looking up at him as he delivered another one to your thigh and you pressed them tighter.

He left the belt by your side on the bed, close to him in signal that he wasn't done with it, he positioned himself close to your legs at the edge of the bed and with the soft touch of his digits dragged your panties down your legs in a soft caressing motion.

Once they were off, he held them up around his fingers, pressing the delicate lace up against his face, inhaling the scent of your wetness, he smiled once he was satisfied and barely rested his hand over your knee before you opened your legs wide for him, letting him see what he knew he was doing to you, letting your wet folds glint for him.

He was admiring you, exposed fully naked for him, breasts rising and falling in deep breaths, his hand slowly picked up the belt again.

-This body...-he started, the belt running up your outer thigh- Is mine to enjoy. This cunt...-he rubbed the belt against your folds, you shifted in anticipation- Is dripping for me and only for me...-

There was silence following his words, soon broken by another smack, directly over your pussy.

-Say it. Whose cunt is this?- he hissed.

You yelped and your thighs closed instinctively, but not for long before they fell open again, the pleasure making its way through the pain.

-Yours.- you struggled to say, your belly tight with the need for relief.

SMACK

-Yours what?-

-Yours daddy- you stuttered, he rubbed your thigh in approval and settled the belt down again.

You wanted to protest when he pulled away again, depriving your skin of his touch, you were done with the teasing, your center begging to be touched and satisfied. You followed his movements with lustful needy eyes as he knelt besides the bed on one knee, still taller than you, Loki scanned your panting body and finally, finally slid his hands towards your pussy.

His fingers parted your folds and coated in your wetness, you sighed and moaned in relief, eyes following their movements as they slid slowly up and down through your folds, almost petting you, drawing a few faint circles over your clit before continuing up and down. You turned to him, begging with your eyes for him to sink his fingers into you.

Thankfully he complied, long fingers sliding easily inside you, your walls instantly clenched around them and you closed your eyes, arching your back as he rubbed over your clit with the heel of his palm and fucked you with his fingers. 

-Mm yes, yess...- you exhaled.

Short moans escaped your mouth, his fingers curled inside you making you arch your back, your orgasm already escalating before Loki pulled his fingers out.

You turned to him and whimpered, biting your lip and flashing your best puppy eyes, your toes curling in need as your orgasm was stolen from you.

-Please...- you whispered.

He looked at you with pooling irises and a devil's grin. The pads of his fingers rubbed circles on your clit and you whimpered, mouth falling open as you looked at him.

-Gods you are just desperate, look at you, whining and pleading, gifting me those doe eyes as if you weren't a filthy little whore...-

He narrowed his eyes as he watched you, calloused digits rubbing on the sensitive nub making you stir in your chains and trash against the bed, his words inducing whimpers that were prayers for his touch.

The patterns over your clit became sloppy and faster, making you buck your hips up, stuttering gasps chocking in your throat as you threw your head back, climax once again building with pressure on your belly.

And then once again, his fingers came to a stop.

You were on the verge of tears, so incredibly close your thighs were shaking, you cried and cooed at him, watching his grin go wider as he burned his stare into you, he leaned closer, looking down at your bitten lips and your teary eyes.

-Show me you deserve to cum. Beg like the pathetic slut you are.- the circles started again, painfully slow.

-Please daddy, please make me cum...please- your voice trailing off in a whisper.

He hummed, though it sounded like a growl, and his eyes slowly admired your face and chest, forehead sweaty, neck and chest probably red with bottled up satisfaction, and he stood up, his fingers leaving you. You shut your eyes, thinking you were being denied your release once again, you pressed your quivering legs together once more to provide any amount of relief.

His hand twisted again and your legs were opened by the force of magic, and he held them there for him as he undid his pants and pulled them down, followed by his shirt and underwear, leaving him completely naked in front of you at the foot of the bed.

Your eyes roamed down the tall broad body until they met his throbbing, twitching cock, a drop of precum at the tip he squeezed as he stroked himself slowly for you, his jaw tense, you couldn't possibly went any longer.

-Please fuck me daddy, fill me up with your cum please...- your voice came innocent, furrowing your brows as you looked up at him.

His chest heaved with a deep breath exhaling in a growl and he climbed over the edge, grasping at your hips before he lined himself up and at last slammed himself balls deep into you, your eyes rolled to the back of your skull a long high moan slid out your throat. He didn't waste time to thrust hard and fast into you, making your body jerk back and forth, Loki leaned forward, a hand wrapping on your neck as if lips found yours.

You hummed in delight at the kiss, savoring his lips and his tongue as he fucked you nice and hard, legs bending and wrapping around his waist, you needed to feel him as close as possible, you tugged at your chains and whined against his lips, his dick sending tingles of electricity through you.

-Loki...aaw, please...- you moaned between kisses, hoping he'd understand.

Fortunately for you he did, and so the hand that wasn't around your neck swiped up and the chains dissipated, you sighed grateful and instantly entangled your hands on his raven hair, always searching to feel more of him, more skin on skin, more of his lips molding yours, any contact he could provide you with you wanted it.

His mouth dropped to your earlobe, nibbling on it before sucking and kissing your neck, leaving a trail of his mark behind as he grunted hot breaths with each hard pump of his cock. He picked up speed, slamming hard into your cervix, your brows knitted together with pleasure, accompanied by whimpers and gasps.

-So warm...so tight...my little slut, always to eager to be full of me.- his voice hoarse against your neck.

-Mm... don't stop, please, please- you pleaded in whines.

Needy and longing for your release you clung to Loki's body like it was your lifeline, his thrusts became more erratic and you climbed your orgasm quicker than before, desperate to reach it, your mouth fell open in a choked moan, your back arched and your nails dug into his scarred back, scratching viciously at the tender skin as you neared your high.

-Oh gods yes yes, mmm please Loki yes!- you screamed as your body trashed and spasmed under him.

You felt the sharp pain of his teeth boring into your shoulder as you threw your head back and attacked his shoulders with your nails, your orgasm crashed into you so hard you swore you saw the stars up in the sky and your hips bucked and stuttered with the strength of your pleasure, Loki still pumping as you orgasmed.

He wasn't quite there yet though, and he didn't waste time slipping out and manhandling you to turn you over on your belly and pin your arms on your lower back, using his other hand to take a hold of your hips and thrusting back inside you from behind. If you thought before was hard you were wrong on all levels, he was feral, skin slapping and low groans and moans escaped his mouth as he pounded you into the mattress searching for his own climax.

-You're so perfect, you were made for me...- he panted, leaned over against your ear 

Your head sunk into the mattress as you fluttered your eyes, the new angle and the force of his pounding already making you lose yourself, you moaned seductively at him, biting your lip.

-You're going to cum for me again is that understood?- he growled, you only managed a lustful cry.

His hips moved sloppily and fast, crashing down against yours, his cock hitting hard on your cervix and making you buzz and tense with your second orgasm, he moaned loudly, and in one last effort you searched for his eyes.

-Fill me up with cum daddy...- you mewled.

This pushed him right over the edge, he twitched inside you and squeezed hard at your hips making you yelp, a few more hard slams into your insides and he came, still moving rhythmically as you milked his cock and he screamed and hissed.

Sweat lined you spine, your body a motionless slump, cum dripping in between your slightly spread legs, and Loki lowering himself to plant gentle kisses on your shoulders and back as his low, satisfied chuckling ceased.

-Good girl, very very good girl...- 

♥️

He rolled off of you and to your side, you were still catching your breath when he slowly pulled you closer and let you snuggle close to him, a silent agreement that you were at a loss of energy to stand up and get cleaned, instead you wanted to buzz with post orgasm shocks until you were taken by sleep.

The day had started out with childbirth and had now ended in whipping and rough sex. You weren't complaining, as a matter of fact, what you had witnessed today left you wanting, wondering if there could be a real chance of the next baby in your arms to be yours.

You allowed yourself to think of that hypothetical future you truly never thought your smile would stretch thinking of, Loki with a baby in arms awoke things inside you that you didn't think were there, you daydreamed about it, until the tears started to crowd and sting, and then you forced yourself to stop, looking back up to the ceiling.

How does one go about being a mere audience to the crumbling structure of a life and peace you were slowly starting to build? How does one ignore the depth of an ocean if you're drowning in it? How can one speak words of doom?

You don't.  
You don't say anything, you drown in the suffocating forced acceptance, you don't cry or scream, your heart isn't allowed to hurt. Not this time. Not the last few days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wheeew, that was some chapter huh??  
> Did you guys like that? Good, cause it gets really sad from this point on
> 
> Tiktok @redlace.girl  
> Twitter @redlacegirl

**Author's Note:**

> Hello fellow simps  
> Welcome to my first fanfiction ever 😅
> 
> I'll post updates and other content on my tiktok @redlace.girl also if you're wondering what the hell the song you're singing is, here's the link: 
> 
> https://youtu.be/KvtT3UyhibQ  
> (yes ik it's Swedish and not nordic)


End file.
